Kiki Dunst Just Isn’t Working For Me Anymore
I don’t know when it happened but Kirsten Dunst just isn’t working for me anymore.
I realize that I am the last remaining human to admit this. Maybe it’s a failure on my part somehow, I just don’t know. But whatever it is, I am unable to understand her appeal.
It doesn’t help that Kirsten Dunst has become more universally hated than the one hot girl at fatty convention.  Let’s face it, I am not an island, I could only withstand the peer pressure so long. I AM HUMAN DAMMIT! And to be perfectly honest people, Kirsten Dunst is…well…she’s fug in ways I can’t understand.
Maybe I was under some kind of Spider-Man spell. She looked hot in that dress when Doc Ock had her all chained up and her bazongas were all full, wet and busting through her dress. Wow, that sounded vaguely arousing. I am not aroused okay. Anyway, since that time I have watched Spider-Man 1 and I have watched Spider-Man 2 and I am over it. She is not pretty.
You know what, her ass doesn’t even try. Dirty blonde hair, pale skin, pointy teeth and a sour expression are not the key ingredients to hot. They are the key ingredients to urban legends involving tales of the undead who feed on the flesh of the living. And my nightmares.
So call me a sell out, call me shallow, call me short-sighted, okay, that’s enough name-calling jackass. Bottom line: Me and the Kikster, we’re through.Â
Pink Stripe WordPress Theme Designed by Joni Mueller & 
the cigarette killed it for me. it’s over.
dammit.
Comment by Mark Saleski — March 6, 2007 @ 4:56 pm
butts suck, but I still think she’s appealing in a not-especially hot girl kind of way. Fight the tide Dawn, fight the tide.
Comment by Eric Olsen — March 6, 2007 @ 6:04 pm
I am trying, but she’s making it hard with that new Nosferatu-look she’s sporting.
And yes Mark, the cigarette was the final straw. Just what she needs to complete the fug conversion.
Comment by dmdo1016 — March 6, 2007 @ 6:51 pm
and dang, she looked so cute…SO cute, at the academy awards.
Comment by Mark Saleski — March 7, 2007 @ 11:44 am
well this i cannot believe… if those couple pictorial numbers up top there weren’t as entrancing as the tongues of the muses, i dare say i’d be raging with all the zeal of a slighted baptist in a field full o’ heathens.
Comment by DukeDeMondo — March 7, 2007 @ 4:18 pm
Duke, I know this would anger you, but I tried to be a wall of strength against the growing tide of Kirsten haters, but she’s not EVEN trying anymore.
Can’t you fall in love with say, Scarlett Johannson or something?
Comment by dmdo1016 — March 7, 2007 @ 6:34 pm