Something nice…..Hawaii is a beautiful place to vacation.

Kelly looks happy.  See that wasn’t so hard.

The deplorable and disgusting 70’s rocker Gary Glitter, best known for his sport anthem “Rock n’ Roll Part 2″ is serving time in Vietnam for his conviction of “committing obscene acts” on underage girls. The children were ages 11 and 12, and as part of his “punishment” he will be clearing trees in the jungle with a chainsaw.

In his defense, he said he had been teaching the girls English at his home and considered them “like his grandchildren”.

Glitter had been sentenced through November 2008, but is now being released three months early in August 2008.  His lawyer says he’s “losing a lot of weight and getting very fit.” 

Excellent! 

It sure would be awful if he suffered from some sort of chainsaw accident, or worse, a tree fell on him and crushed him into oblivion?

It would seem the saintly image the media has cast Angelina Jolie into isn’t as angelic as she would like us to believe.  With barely a week having passed since Angelina brought home another adopted child from overseas, her Vietnamese son Pax, the actress has signed on to begin shooting another movie starting in April, an action film called Wanted, with filming based in Prague.  Many were surprised to see her show up in Chicago for screen test for the film on March 23, with new son Pax only just introduced into his new family.

Angelina had said in interviews that she had no plans to be away from her family as they transitioned another child into their growing brood which now stands at 4: 5-year-old son Maddox from Cambodia, 2-year-old daughter Zahara from Ethiopia, 10-month-old daughter Shiloh - her only biological child with partner Brad Pitt — and now Pax, her 3-year-old son from Vietnam.  That’s four children under the age of five.  Not an easy task for any mother, but an especially difficult one for a mother who has a busy schedule that keeps her away from her children for days at a time. Angelina’s statement on March 16 to Ho Chi Minh City Law newspaper :

“I will stay at home to help Pax adjust to his new life.I have four children and caring for them is the most important thing for the moment.”

While some are slamming Us magazine as being jealous and angered over Angelina favoring People magazine for her coveted pictorials, that is simplistic at best.  I doubt a whole editorial board of a major magazine decided to go after a huge star with such a stark tone, without some kind of actual concern for the situation of her family.  This is Us we’re talking about, not the National Enquirer. 

And I am reticent to point this out, but I have been voicing my concerns about the Angelina Manipulation machine for months. Not once have I ever felt comfortable with the image she portrays to the world.  Something deep within me feels stirred and uneasy about the facade of “goodwill” she wants us all to accept  – perhaps it is my own maternal instincts.  At the core of my concern is that she really does favor her adopted children over her biological one, a claim Us makes as well. 

If this is true, which I fundamentally believe it is, then that is the sign of a horribly sick mind.  The kind of mind that would eventually do something either consciously, or subconsciously to harm her biological child.  I doubt in a physical way, but absolutely in a spiritual and psychological way.  I am confident that Brad also has deep concerns about Angelina’s relationship with Shiloh, which may have led to the fight Us reported they had they had prior to her visit to Vietnam. 

In fairness to Brangelina, we don’t REALLY know what goes on behind closed doors, and it’s doubtful that the children aren’t being cared for properly by a trained army of handlers.  That’s not the central issue.  The central issue is Angelina projects one thing to the world in an effort to manipulate and control her image as she would like it to be, but the real Angelina, the private one we don’t see - is not a saint, and truly as her own father said has “serious emotional problems.” 

I’ve said it before, and I guess I need to say again, Brad isn’t going to make it with her for the long haul.  He may be a philandering cad, but he genuinely seems to care about his children, and no good father would stay with a woman who isn’t true to her own flesh and blood. 

Maybe it’s the fact that Fox’s American Idol infused some fresh blood into the show by having Gwen Stefani on to mentor the Top Ten final contestants, or the anticipation over the fate of pop culture phenom Sanjaya Malakar, but the show is now becoming interesting.

I like Gwen, think she’s really a great performer and an icon.  I don’t say that lightly because I pretty much hate ALL celebrities and most popular music.  But anyone who can reinvent ska and pop gets a thumbs up from me, plus her single with Akon is fun and light.  Just like her. I loved her honesty on the show, and clearly the contestants took her advice to heart.

Gwen told Blake to put the beat-boxing on the dl while performing the Cure’s “Love Song” - and he did an incredible job, sans beatbox on a classic alterna-rock ballad.  The guy has a nice voice and a unique quality.  I agree with Paula, he’s the best male on the show. He’s safe.

I also agreed with her suggestion that Chris Richardson needs to keep the “vocal olympics” to a minimum, while performing No Doubt’s “Don’t Speak.”  He’s hot, he’s got JT all over him, but seriously that whole effected voice thing is lame and gets old real fast.  He’s safe.

She also suggested that Chris Sligh get the timing and the rhythm down before he performed the Police’s “Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic”, too bad he wasn’t able to handle the song.  I like Chris, but he’s losing my interest.  Bottom three tonight.

LaKisha looked good and sounded great doing Donna Summer’s “Last Dance”.  I like her, she’s a great performer and deserves to win.  Plus, she’s nice and fluffy up top!

Haley Scarnato looks good, but she’s boring as hell.  Bottom three. 

Phil Stacey has an awesome voice and I really like to hear him sing, but he’s not showing as much charisma as I think he has, plus his look is killing me.  I don’t know.  I want to see him stay, but I feel like he’s going to be in the bottom three, despite doing a great job on the Police’s, “Every Breath You Take.”

I had great concern over Jordin Sparks doing No Doubt’s “Hey Baby,” the song as they said is very stylized and not easy to mimic.  She did an okay job and for some reason people like her.  She’s too perky for my taste, but she’s safe.

Melinda Doolittle needs to stop mugging for the camera, we get it, you’re humble and surprised that everyone loves you.  Enough already.  Safe - and annoying. Safe.

Gina Glocksen did a nice job.  Her face scares me, she might be in the bottom three.

Sanjaya, safe.  Why? Because his hair rules!

UPDATE: Sanjaya Safe, Chris Sligh Goes Home. I guess he isn’t bringing chubby back.

The always great Radar Online has an interesting little bio on Daisy Lowe, the 16-year-old love child of Bush frontman Gavin Rossdale and singer/fashion designer Pearl Lowe. Not sure exactly how this was kept a secret for so long, but it won’t be a secret much longer, as we are about to be served up a dose of Daisy Lowe — all up in your grill UK style. Think I’m kidding. Just ask Lily Allen and Amy Winehouse how they became household names? I digress.

So it seems that Little Ms. Daisy’s pedigree is impressive. Until recently she thought Gavin Rossdale was merely her godfather until DNA tests proved otherwise. Mom and her dad are at each other’s throats over child support back payments. Speaking of dads, her mom’s long-term partner is Supergrass drummer Danny Goffey and she has three half-siblings, Alfie, Frankie and Betty. Her mom was supposedly having an affair with Jude Law AND his ex-wife, Sadie Frost. She and mum Pearl are recording an album with step-dad Danny titled Getting Back On Track. Thank you Wikipedia.

Mom’s working on a memoir titled All That Glitters and discusses her life and her drug addiction.

Poor Gwen, who needs that kind of drama? She has said this about her marriage to Gavin Rossdale and having baby Kingston:

“We’ve had an ongoing love affair with peaks and valleys. Having him [Kingston] has been the most romantic thing to have happened to us.”

Kingston is WAY cuter than Daisy, and I bet when he spits up fruit loops it’s on accident.

Don’t forget to watch Kingston’s mom on American Idol tonight, performing her new single “Sweet Escape” with the super-hot Akon!

I was trying to find the name of a song I keep hearing on the radio that I think is either Coldplay or Adam Duritz, but instead I found this video. 

I would like to be able to say that I am too mature to find this type of thing funny, but sadly I am not.  I would also like to say that I am too mature to not own such a thing as a “farting” machine, but alas I cannot.  And lastly, while I wish I could proclaim my maturity level is above pulling stunts like this, unfortunately that would be a lie. I am extremely proud of my ability to laugh until I cry at fake farts. 

Found the song I was looking for, was neither Coldplay or Adam Duritz, but Mat Kearney. I like this song, even though my husband said it was lame. He also thinks fart machines are lame, so I think that says it all huh? Loser!

TMZ is reporting that E! News  Los Angeles office buildring has been evacuated due to two separate overseas bomb threats.  So far, nothing has materialized, in other coincidental news, PerezHilton’s site is down.  Hmmmm…. very interesting 

Ohh, I so hope the bomb squad is probing his every orifice right now.  On second thought, I hope not.  Why should he have all the fun?

  Jennifer 170 - hell no                  Jennifer 140 - um, no

I am not trying to harsh Jennifer Hudson’s mellow or anything, but she doesn’t weigh 140lbs.  I am guessing she weighs about 160 pounds, if she’s lucky.  According to the April 2 issue of In Touch, J-Hud claims that she’s lost 30 pounds since her time on American Idol in 2004, by working out and eating smaller portions and healthier food.  That’s awesome, but the numbers she gives:  I call total BS.  She looks like she weighed closer to 200 during her time on American Idol.  Sure the camera adds 10 pounds, but seriously, I have a scale too and I know what weight looks like what.

Obviously Jennifer’s lost a lot of weight, there is NO doubt, and she looks great, but she needs to start being honest. 

If she’s going to make statements like, “There’s something wrong when you’re just skin and bones,” then she should be forthcoming about how her figure reflects her weight.  In a world where women are obsessed with their weight and see images of celebrities and try to emulate them, how can we possibly attain any level of equilibrium within ourselves when celebrities lie about their weights.

Jennifer is 5′9″.  For her to be that tall and be that curvy still, there is NO way she weighs 140.  Look at Tyra Banks, she claims she weighs 161 and she looks a damn site better in a bikini than Jennifer Hudson would.  Again, not trying to hate on J-Hud, just trying to be real. 

Show me the scale with her on it, and I will eat my words with a double helping of whipped cream.  mmmm…whipped cream.

Kate Hudson and Owen “Butterscotch Stallion” Wilson are the most annoying couple.  Owen is a perpetual teenager unable to commit to even the hottest female celeb like Kate Hudson, and Kate, can’t seem to take a hint.  Does Owen have some sort of magical weenis?  Maybe it does some kind of laser-light show after dark.  All I know is that everytime I read a story about these two it aggravates me how unwilling he is to give her what she needs in a relationship and how totally “penilized” she is by his special charm.

Kate has been in Australia for the past few months filming Fool’s Gold with Matthew McConaughy and according to reports, the two are getting chummy, and maybe Matt’s been the source of comfort Kate needs as she finally figures out that Owen is a worthless pursuit. Matt and Kate worked together on a previous film, How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days, but she was married to rocker Chris Robinson at the time.  Maybe now, the two can finally see if there’s any real chemistry between them.

As for Owen, not only was he out with Woody Harrellson on the night of the infamous brawl at a Venice bar, but apparently he’s been seen with two “mystery” women in the last few weeks and has bailed on visits to see Kate down under several times.

Truthfully, I hope she does move on.  Owen’s hot and all, but no woman needs to put up with that kind of commitment-resistant whack-a-doo.  Go ahead Matt, show her the good lovin’.

It would seem the real reason that Katie and Tom seem so dour as of late is the fact that they have Tom’s mom, Mary, his sister, Cass, and her two sons living with them in their Beverly Hills home. No matter how much you love your in-laws, and no matter how big your house is, having that much family around has got to be really annoying. This week’s In Touch has the details on why Katie is less than happy about the arrangements.

Katie talked to Harper’s Bizarre about her living arrangements in a March interview:

“We live with my sister-in-law, her two sons, my mother-in-law and our kids. There’s always something going on in this house.”

An insider close to the family says that while she accepts Tom’s adopted kids Isabella, 14, and Connor, 12, she is NOT digging all the extra family around and as the insider put it, “What new bride wants to eat breakfast every morning with her mother-in-law?”

Um, none. I can relate to Katie’s predicament. I have two older step-children who are awesome, but it’s not always fun and games. They resent the new ones and you are often reminded that you aren’t their mother. Which leaves you somewhere in between being a wretched bitch and occasionally a close friend. But having your in-laws, including his free-loader sister and her two fricken wildebeasts hanging around has gotta really blow. Move out, you damn leeches!

Despite the couple’s plans to buy a new home, a private compound in the Hollywood hills, chances are the baggage is coming with them. Tom likes having his extended family around, regardless of Katie’s need for some privacy with her husband and kids, and let’s face it, Tom’s a momma’s-boy — not too mention — awfully chummy with his three Scientology sisters.

I bet the antennas are on high alert in that household now that Tom’s mom, Mary Lee, has also been converted into a Xenu lover. Poor Katie and little Suri. On a positive note, the new place is said to have three separate houses on the grounds, so maybe she and the kids can escape from the lunacy from time to time.

One more thing, Suri is not only one of the cutest little Hollywood babies, but she is definitely Tom’s kid. Look at her face, she looks just like him. Hopefully his looks are all she inherited. I hear “the crazy” can skip a generation. I got my fingers crossed Suri!