Paris Hilton Fires Spokesperson Elliot Mintz After Court Fiasco
Elliot Mintz is no longer representing heiress and celebutant Paris Hilton. Reports are stating they have parted ways in light of her recent court date, and despite his efforts to defend her in court, efforts Judge Michael Sauer who presided over the case against Hilton called “completely worthless,” he was given the boot. Mintz, who’s also repped Yoko Ono released this statement to the media:
The day after the hearing, I sent an e-mail expressing my sadness over the ruling of the judge and the irrational sentence he imposed. In that e-mail I also offered my sincerest apology for any misunderstanding she received from me regarding the terms of her probation. To the extent that I have miscommunicated information I received from her attorneys……I am deeply and profoundly sorry. I told her that I assume personal responsibility for my part in this matter. I believe when stated in court that she believed it was o.k. for her to drive under certain circumstances she was being absolutely truthful. Due to this misunderstanding, I am no longer representing Paris. For the record, I have nothing but love and respect for Paris and her family. Paris is a wonderful person and does not deserve the punishment that was handed down by the court. I only wish her my best.
One can only imagine that today is the happiest day in Elliot Mintz life. No longer will he be forced to release dissembling statements so skillfully crafted, so tautological and yet incoherent, that the web of deceit he weaves is perceived as truth and the media is left with a bewildered mix of frustration, confusion and a sense of vertigo. He’s got mad skillz!
Here’s some of Mintz’s greatest hits:
In response to FirecrotchGate of ‘06, wherein we all observed Brandon Davis in a drunken rant going on and on about the unique characteristics inherent to Lindsay Lohan’s ginger-hued nether regions, whilst Paris cackles in delight, and Mintz winces in pain – the pr man released this gem:
“The only thing I want to underscore is the person making the statements was not Paris Hilton,” he says, “It is unfair to characterize Brandon’s statements as being reflective of Paris’ feelings about Lindsay. We’re dealing with two different people. It was Brandon who was speaking, of course there are moments when Paris was laughing, but she never said anything. Brandon was speaking for himself not for her. Personally,” he adds, “I found the incident unnecessary.”
A couple of my personal favorites were his responses to pictures of Paris at a Dolce and Gabbana fashion show, her purse wide open displaying a tidy bag of what could only be the finest sativa in all the land, and in a separate incident were she is witnessed smoking something that could only have been described as a joint. With this kind of flagrant and taunting display of disregard for the law, he pulled out all the stops and released prevaricating statements in spite of photographic evidence to the contrary:
“Things are not always as they appear. It would be unfair to draw any conclusions based solely on these photos.”
and
“I just want to get something clear, Paris Hilton rolls her own tobacco cigarettes. It was tobacco.”
Then of course there’s this statement in reference to rumors that Paris Hilton has herpes, which we all now know she does [Please see Exhibit A below]:
“She doesn’t have herpes.”
Really, the list goes on and on, because Paris is a publicist’s worst nightmare (well except perhaps for Lindsay Lohan). In fact, if you were to judge Mr. Mintz solely on his job requirements and commitment to his clients, he’s a hero; a prince among men. Mintz is more than willing to tell flat out lies to the media to protect his client and he also goes the extra mile to present them[clients] in the best possible light, despite their[Paris'] efforts to present themselves in the worst.
For Paris to place sole and complete blame on her publicist for her run-ins with the law– it is obvious that she does NOT accept responsibility for her behavior and is completely pampered and shielded from the harshest realities of life.
In my opinion, by allowing Mintz to take the fall for her actions Paris Hilton is at her most selfish and immature.
I would bet hadMs. Hilton stood up before the court, taken complete responsibility for this mess and laid the blame squarely on her own shoulders, she would have gotten a much better result from the judge, the media and the public. Really, this is all we want from any individual – take responsibility for your own actions.
As for Elliot Mintz, I wouldn’t worry about him. Any professional PR person willing to go to the lengths this guy has gone is guaranteed a long and successful career in Hollywood — there’s always some celeb looking for someone to take the fall.
In conclusion, Elliot Mintz cannot tell the truth, so his statement to the press should be taken on its opposite meaning, which would read:
I believe when stated in court that she believed it was o.k. for her to drive under certain circumstances she was being absolutely untruthful. Due to this misunderstanding, I am no longer representing Paris. For the record, I have nothing but hate and contempt for Paris and her family. Paris is a horrible person and does deserve the punishment that was handed down by the court. I only wish her my worst.
See telling the truth is easy and feels good!
Exhibit A:
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