Britney Spears Films New Music Video
 
Above is a picture of Britney Spears on a film shoot for a new music video. Really? Haven’t we all suffered enough? Are my prayers falling on deaf ears? Well I guess that’s obvious.
I really hate to be negative. Well, maybe “hate” is a strong word. Perhaps prefer NOT to be negative is more appropriate, but what kind of mirrors do they have in Britney’s house? Funhouse mirrors? Trick mirrors? Maybe it’s like that magical mirror in Harry Potter and The Sorcerer’s Stone. You know, the one where you see what you WANT to see, not the trainwreck standing before you. And are those around her intentionally going out of their way to make her look like absolute hell?
Britney is also said to have completed a tell-all interview with OK! Magazine where she will talk about her mommy dearest, Small Fry and Tator Tot, The Federator and the dementia she is apparently suffering from. Okay, I was kidding about that last part. But still? OK! Magazine? Why not The National Enquirer for crying out loud? These girls are so trifling. Here’s the statement from OK!’s editor Sarah Ivens:
“OK! Magazine spent a heartbreaking day with Britney Spears and witnessed first-hand an emotional cry for help that will leave you shocked and sad. This week, on newsstands Friday, the truth will be told.â€
Well I am sure it was heartbreaking, as any day with Britney Spears should be viewed as a tragedy, but I don’t know about the whole “truth will be told” crap. Didn’t she tell Matt Lauer the truth about how great her life is and how in love she and K-Fed were? Yep, Britney is a veritable pillar of veracity.
And please spare me the Britneyspazmatics who can’t bear to hear a word of criticism about their beloved trailer park angel, because instead of making me feel bad about my critical analysis of the fallen poptart, your barely literate musings provide me with jovial fodder and we here at the Glosslip family gather ’round to read them out loud as part of our evening amusement ritual.
Kind of like a hillbilly rendition of Garrison Kellor. Except on crack, maybe we could call it a Mobile Home Companion.
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i love britney but you are too funny!
Comment by rebekah — July 24, 2007 @ 12:25 pm
ABOUT BRIT FROM DR ABBY:
PLEASE READ ::::::::::
What is bacterial vaginosis?
Bacterial vaginosis is an abnormal vaginal condition that is characterized by vaginal discharge and talking to reporters without the aid of a publicist or stylist.
The condition results from an overgrowth of normal bacteria in the vagina when it comes in contact with flamin’ hot cheetos and pure-bred dog hair.
In the past, the condition was called Gardnerella vaginitis, after the bacteria that was thought to cause the condition.
However, the new name, Brit-Brit-Bacterial-Vaginosis, reflects the recent research establishing that there are a number of species of bacteria that naturally live in and around the routinely unwashed vaginal area.
The Gardnerella organism is not the sole culprit causing the symptoms, sometimes infections are caused by cocoa soy latte contaminated fingers inbedding in the lining of a freshly shaved labia minora.
When these multiple species of bacteria become imbalanced, a woman can have a vaginal discharge that is associated with a foul odor much like when an air-tight bag of raw chicken is left in the sun.
Bacterial vaginosis is not passed by sex and is not dangerous, but it can cause disturbing symptoms:
Drinking and driving, coke binging, puppy buying, and slutty clothes wearing are just a few.
Any woman with an unusual discharge or the urge to pee in front of cameramen should be evaluated so that serious infections, such as chlamydia (SEE ALSO: Parishiltonosis) and gonorrhea, can be excluded.
Comment by DR ABBY RHODES — July 24, 2007 @ 3:49 pm
We all love Britney, but COME ON! Thanks Rebekah.
And Dr. Rhodes, are you for reals? I had NO idea that those various pesky vaginal infections were also responsible for mental incapcitation. Jeebus talk about medical mysteries!
Comment by dmdo1016 — July 24, 2007 @ 4:44 pm