I So Need This: The Walkstation
I just wanted you to know that I’ve been very, very, very good this year and I have not been bad at all…at least, not so’s you’d notice. I can explain about that time I hollered at that old grandma in Wal-Mart. And there’s a perfectly good reason why I tailgated that guy on my way to church this week. And I swear, I didn’t mean to be so nasty when that teenager working at Taco Bell forgot my chili cheese burrito. There is a perfectly good explanation for all of this.
I’m just a wee bit crazy.
So, if you can overlook that, and realize that I really am trying, and that I have a good heart (that I’d like to get healthier), then you can understand why this is all I am asking for this year as my Christmas present. You see, my badonkadonk has a bit more kadonk that I like, and I want to get it in shape. But who has time, now that I am writing for GlossLip? I barely have time to work in my three-hour daily nap, my afternoon carb overload, and my midnight Moon Pie odyssey, let alone find a chance to get on the treadmill. This could solve all my problems. Yes, I do need to learn how to type and walk at the same time, but I recently mastered the art of walking and thinking about where I am going, so I am pretty sure I can do it.
I know it is going to run about $6500 USD, but think of the joy you’ll give me when I find this under the Christmas tree. And I promise, if you bring me one, I won’t write that piece about you and those suspicious “reindeer games”. Hey, I can understand how these things happen, but I’m just sayin’, that’s all. You forgot the numero uno rule of celebrityism…never record in any way what you don’t want to come back to haunt you.
Have a nice Christmas. I’ll try to remember not to eat all the chocolate chip cookies and to leave you a couple.
kthxbai
k
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Oooohhhh, I want one too!
Comment by D — October 20, 2007 @ 10:47 am
Ha ha! That’s great, I want one too! I really do!! Between the office and my home, I spend at least 12 hours a day in front of the computer.
Comment by Mitsu — October 20, 2007 @ 1:35 pm
As much time as I spend in front of the computer, my badonkadonk would be a badinkadink in no time.
Comment by k — October 20, 2007 @ 2:31 pm