Britney Spears Buys Goldfish; In Related News, She Also Walked And Breathed
Yes, GlossLip fans, I have been reduced to this:Â Britney Spears purchased a goldfish over the weekend.
Should I just impale myself on the turkey carcass now and get it over with? What a slow celeb news weekend this was…and let’s face it, it’s Monday morning, and articles about Brit just kind of write themselves.
It would seem that everybody’s favorite poptart was seen out and about this weekend at a Petco, where terrier London made his celebrated return to the spotlight and an unlucky goldfish was chosen to escape its life of three-second memory in a community tank at a pet store for a life being fed Cheeto crumbs at Brit’s house. A week there and the fish will wish it was back at Petco, listening to kids bang on the glass and running into other goldfish that look just like him.
See, this is what I mean. Did she just suddenly have this intense desire to take her 12-cylinder Mercedes to Petco, trailed by the pap circus, because she simply had to have a goldfish? Doesn’t she have people who can do that?
There are also rumors that Brit will take Billy Ray Cyrus up on his offer of having her over for Thanksgiving. Now there’s a meal I’d love to be a flower in the centerpiece for. (Great, just typing that sentence has put “Achy Breaky Heart” into repeat play mode in my brain. Fabulous. Where’s that turkey carcass?)
Is it cruel to make a Death Pool for a goldfish?
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Like you, I would just love to know the thought process that goes on before hopping in the new Mercedes to purchase a couple of new goldfish. My guess is that she woke up and discovered that the old goldfish were swimming sideways.
Must. Have. New. Goldfish. NOW.
On the plus side, she appears to be one of the few celebs who actually carry cash. How rare is that????
Someone really ought to approach her about a reality show, like “The Anne Nicole Show” and “Being Bobby Brown.” At least this way she’d have an actual reason for being followed by a camera crew. I never watched “Idiotic” - oh wait, it was “Chaotic” but I think I’d watch “Being Britney Spears” because now she’s way more “trainwreck-y” than before.
Comment by crazymom — November 19, 2007 @ 11:25 am
“The Britney Spears Three Ring Circus?!!” Crazymom you are on to something.
My burning question is where did she find this Sam Lufti fellow and are they making “sexytime” because the very thought of Britney making sexytime brings into mind the phrase “if the trailer’s rockin’ don’t come knockin” and images of an alternately sobbing and babbling Britney running around naked saying “Do I look fat in this y’all?” or “where’s my smokes? I’m done sexied out, I need my smokes.”
She used to be so pretty, what the hell happened?
Comment by D — November 19, 2007 @ 2:03 pm
I’m just glad to see that London is alive! Hooray, the little doggie lives!
…although, in almost every picture I see of him, he’s always got that look on his face like, “How do I get away from this crazy lady?” He’s always looking down at the ground like he’s considering jumping.
Comment by Mitsu — November 19, 2007 @ 2:25 pm
p.s.
Death watch for the goldfish - hilarious!
Comment by Mitsu — November 19, 2007 @ 2:25 pm
How long until the ASPCA or PETA involved — Brit can’t be any better for a dog’s well being than Michael Vick, and Heather Mills probably needs some face time.
Comment by crazymom — November 19, 2007 @ 4:03 pm
[...] she trying fill the void after losing her two sons? I thought that was purpose of buying the goldfish. Unlucky goldfish they [...]
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