Just for D, here’s some Justin, minus his box.

Enjoy Justin channeling his inner John Holmes in the upcoming Mike Myers film The Love Guru.

TGIF!

Wait, people don’t do videotape any more, do they?  Well, anyway, you get the idea.

I feel absolutely dirty even posting this link.  I seriously need a shower or something.  My OCD is kicking in and I must go wash my hands.  So while I do that, you go check out the chat between Perez Hilton and the guy whom he promised to help if he’d just send Perez some nakie stuff of himself.

I absolutely must warn you.  The language is NSFW, there are some definite NSFW photos, and I know more about little Perez than I ever wanted to know (although I’m sure he, like most other males, exaggerate).  Do not say you haven’t been warned.  Although…I’m not sure who comes across (no pun intended) as the more pathetic, JJ or Perez.

Never put anything in writing, video, or photos what you don’t want to come back to haunt you.

I’m so ending this article.

Whatever Michael Jackson is paying his lawyers must be worth it, because it’s coming out that he might be able to keep kiddie-bait Neverland Ranch after all:

“Michael Jackson’s ranch is not going to be auctioned off at the courthouse,” the Jackson insider said. “The financing is all being worked out.”

“There are plenty of lenders willing to work with him. The real estate market is very bad right now and Jackson is being affected just like many other Americans,” the source said. […]

The real estate source said other options are available to Jackson, including selling the ranch directly to another party or making a payment on his $24.5 million Neverland debt that would satisfy the trustee.

The recorder’s Web site also reveals there was a release of lien on Jackson on February 4, showing he paid off all or part of delinquent taxes to the state of California.

“It seems unlikely that someone would pay off back taxes, only to let the ranch go up for auction a few weeks later,” said the real estate source.

Jackson has not lived at Neverland since June 2005, after a Santa Barbara County jury found him not guilty of child molestation charges.

News is that he is also missing payments on his family’s Los Angeles home:

Public documents show Michael Jackson has repeatedly failed to make mortgage payments on a Los Angeles home that has been used for years by his family.

Documents filed with the Los Angeles County Recorder’s Office indicate the reclusive pop star was most recently in default last month on the property in Encino, an area in the San Fernando Valley.

The singer had $153,910 in missed payments as of Jan. 17 on a $4 million loan serviced by Pasadena-based mortgage lender IndyMac Bancorp. Documents dated Feb. 7 show the notice of default was withdrawn.

Documents also show Jackson previously faced possible default over missed payments on the home in April and August.

And even if he does find a way out of this, he’s still in deep doody:

According to experts, Jackson could be very much on the hook with the Internal Revenue Service for around $5 million in capital gains taxes. In other words: His home would be gone, but he’d still be significantly in debt.

The reason for this is: Jackson bought Neverland for between $12 million and $14 million back in 1988. If it sells for the full amount owed, $24.5 million, there’s a conceivable difference of $10 million.

According to California law, Jackson would then be taxed on that money as if he’d sold the property and it was income. According to a California state-sponsored Web site, www.ftb.ca.gov, Jackson would be liable for this money. A ballpark figure could be as much as $5 million.

To add insult to injury, the Neverland auction, as it stands, will take place on the steps of the Santa Barbara County courthouse. The auctioneer likely will be a representative from Financial Title Company of San Francisco.

Bidders will have to come with cashier’s checks for the amount they want to offer. Once the bidding begins, Fortress Investments — the original lender and beneficiary of the bid — can’t stop it. Someone will win Neverland.

The good news is that once a bid is accepted, Jackson is no longer the debtor. If Fortress accepts a lower bid than $24.5 million, Jackson is not liable for the balance. The debt is cleared. 

Neverland has been in default since October 19.  He had ninety days to fix this, but did not. 

So let me get this straight.  MJ doesn’t work, doesn’t want to work (among others, he recently turned down a series of concerts at London’s Millennium Dome for a reported $1M each), sales of his re-release of Thriller are off, he lives off the kindness of friends, and he has people lined up to loan him money?

Where can I get these people?  Because where I come from (hereafter to be known as “The Real World”), if you refuse to work and have no money, people do not stand in line to give you more money.  If you do not have money to pay off your bills, then you don’t go shopping for new things until the bills are paid off.  I need a vehicle to drive out-of-state, so do I now march down to the bank and ask for more money, borrow more than I can reasonably make payments on, conveniently forget to pay it back, and when they turn up wanting their money I just go to a different bank and take out more, starting the whole cycle over again?  If I did that for long, I’d be homeless, broke, and probably in jail.

Let’s face it…all Michael has his lawyers do is shuffle papers around.  There’s no real money, just papers with figures.  I mean, there are decent, hardworking people all over America losing their homes to foreclosure through no fault of their own, but rather to a sagging economy or layoffs or illness…if they could work to pay off their debts, they would.  And then you have this guy.  Let’s let Joe Schmoe try showing up at the local credit union with some papers detailing his “financial assets,” or let him go to the local bank and tell them he doesn’t have a job, he doesn’t want to have a job, he is living in a house loaned to him, but he wants the bank to give him a bunch of money, and see what happens.  Fun for the whole family!

I still say he should sell it to Britney Spears.  Two problems solved with one fell swoop!

Two doctors are being investigated in the death of actor Heath Ledger.  Federal drug authorities are looking into the drugs prescribed, because Heath’s death was blamed on an accidental mixture of prescriptions:

The doctors - one in California, one in Texas - are believed to have supplied the “Brokeback Mountain” star with the powerful painkillers Oxycontin and Vicodin, law enforcement sources said. Authorities want to know if the drugs were prescribed illegally. “It’s an ongoing investigation,” a law enforcement source told The News Tuesday. “It’s not clear if there was any wrongdoing.”

The revelation came more than a month after the 28-year-old Australian heartthrob’s naked body was found in his SoHo loft.

The city’s medical examiner ruled Ledger died on Jan. 22 of an accidental overdose of six prescription drugs, including the two painkillers, sleeping pills and anti-anxiety medication. The federal Drug Enforcement Administration has subpoenaed the medical examiner’s findings as part of its probe into the doctors, the sources said.

Do they always have to say he was found naked?  Like that in and of itself is some sort of crime or weirdness.  Lots of people sleep naked.

It may or may not be that these doctors are guilty of any wrongdoing.  However, it is only prudent of physicians to check what prescription or OTC medications a patient is already taking, and writing new prescriptions accordingly or advising patients on the safety of taking one medication with another.  Heath may or may not have told his doctors of any other medications he was taking.  It may come out that he purposefully obtained the prescriptions without the doctors knowing of each other.  Or, it might be as simple as he just didn’t realize the dangers of taking one with the other.

Heath had fought a long battle with drug use, but by all accounts he was trying to get clean when he died, and illegal drugs played no part in his death.  He also suffered from severe insomnia, which led him to take a prescription sleep aid that turned out to be not much help to him.  Plus, at the time of his death, he was suffering from pneumonia, which undoubtedly weakened his immune system.

Always check with your doctor before mixing any sorts of medications, and make sure you know what you’re taking and what it does to your body.

UPDATE:  These two doctors have been cleared:

Federal officials have ruled out two L.A. and Houston-based doctors as the providers of the OxyContin and Vicodin that played a part in the accidental overdose of Heath Ledger, reports the New York Post.

After questioning the docs, the Drug Enforcement Agency found they had prescribed the Brokeback Mountain star other medications, just not the heart-stopping drugs that resulted in the 28-year-old death in NYC on January 22.

Well MY illusions have been shattered.

It would seem one Mario Lavanderia, better known as Perez Hilton, told an aspiring young blogger that he’d promote his site in exchange for some sex videos, and then bailed on him faster than you can say, “Hand me a tissue”:

Jonathan Jaxson - a former publicist and founder of gossip site JJ’s Dirt - told Page Six he sent Lavandeira sexually explicit videos of himself with the hope of Lavandeira’s help, which never materialized.

“He would tell me he would give me stories for my blog,” Jaxson, 24, said of Lavandeira, 29. “He used me.” […]

The New York Times ran a gushing puff piece on “Perez” Tuesday, reporting he gets 2.8 million visitors a month and is in talks with Warner Music for his own label because he has such a great ear for new music.

In an exchange from Sept. 1, 2007, Lavandeira told Jaxson, “you should totally make a sex tape . . . (but not with me).” Jaxson wrote back, “I will have to make one on here for you tomorrow and e-mail it to you.” Lavandeira responded, “Hot! Do it now!”

The next afternoon, Lavandeira asked Jaxson, “When are you sending me that video you promised?” Jaxson responded, “If you do a phone blog with me for my blog . . . as if I am cold calling you in attempt to get advice for my blog. You can be totally rude. I don’t want others to know we talk.”

The next day, Lavandeira asked again, “Where is that video?”

Jaxson told Page Six he sent Lavandeira videos of himself masturbating and other forms of “sex videos,” but said he only met Lavandeira in person three times - once in Florida and twice in New York.

“I fell in love with Perez. I thought he had a huge heart . . . but he’s just a [bleep]hole,” Jaxson told us. “We started working together and communicating on how to make my blog bigger. Then it got more personal and intimate.”

Hmm hmm hmm.  I mean, I’ve used Perez’s site for information before, and generally he can get some good dirt on celebs, but this is something different entirely.  Is Perez the pottymouth calling the celebrity kettles black?

I mean, it could be a case of a spurned lover wanting to extract some publicity, or cash, from someone who is in a more advantageous position than they are.  But, then again…in things like this, it’s often he said, he said.  This one ought to get good.  Nobody can hold a grudge like the gays.

But there is a lesson to be learned by all you young thangs out there:  Never put on video or audio what you don’t want people to see.  Oh yeah, and people will say anything for sex.

Don’t you know how people are, nobody loves you when you’re down on the floor after you fell off your shoes because they’re stupid and everybody is laughing at you?  (My apologies to John Anderson)

Baby needs a new pair of shoes, but these are evidently for people with more money than brains:

The 5 1/2in creations by Briton Antonio Berardi can hardly be described as high heels, since they lack the most important part - a heel.

For the bargain price of £1,800, the wearer will get to totter around with all her weight balanced on a thickened platform sole.

Unsurprisingly, fashionistas are jostling to buy a pair.

Stars including Gwyneth Paltrow and Uma Thurman invested in a black patent version costing more than £1,100, shortly after they were unveiled in Berardi’s spring/summer collection in Paris.

And Victoria Beckham apparently has a snakeskin pair.

They are going on sale in Browns stores in London, where they have to be ordered up to five weeks in advance.

Lincolnshire-born Berardi, 39, said he was inspired by Latin American music and 1980s post-modernism, adding: “When you walk, it is almost on tiptoe. You look really dainty.”

Uhm, no you don’t.  You look like an idiot.

Maybe this explains the “dainty” appeal of the shoes:

A spokesman for his Paris-based fashion house said: “The shoe has a bigger platform sole which stretches back further than normal and gives support under the arch of the foot.

“When walking though, you have to put your toe rather than your heel down first and you cannot wear them for very long.

“They are not dangerous because you would have to lean quite far back before you fell over.”

A reminder…don’t drink and couture. 

Seriously…$3600 to traipse around on my tippietoes, with my foot bent into a position feet are not meant to be bent into, just for a pair of shoes?  No thanks…I’ll stick to my crocs.  At least my feet don’t hurt and I don’t have bunions the size of ostrich eggs.

Oh yeah…and at least I have a brain and know how to use it to be individual, instead of being a slave to every crazy fashion that clomps down the runway.

This is a brief video which shows what the inside of the RPF looks like. The RPF, or Rehabilitation Project Force is where Sea Org members go who’ve been disaffected with the movement.

A re-education camp where they do about five or six hours of manual labor and then spend the rest of their day being re-orientated with the ideology of Scientology, or what they call “auditing.”

Essentially a forced labor camp used to re-indoctrinate Scientologist back into the fold. This has been called a modern day “gulag.”

Here’s more on what goes on inside the RPF from an article in Rolling Stone. After the jump is a section of the article which discusses 13-year-old Jeffrey’s life in the Sea Org and his experiences with the RPF. I encourage you to read this, and if you have time, the entire Rolling Stone article.

But wait, there’s more…

All you tweenyboppers and young thangs so infatuated with hot star Orlando Bloom? Yeah, you might want to rethink that…if you’re into not stinking up the room, that is:

“Miranda thinks Orlando is too smelly. Recently, she asked him if he could wash his clothes and perhaps shower more often.”

When he’s not working on a film, the Pirates of the Caribbean star, 31, “goes days without washing his clothes,” adds the source. “He’ll wear the same jeans for a week before he throws them in the washer. Same goes for his sweaters, T-shirts and socks.”

It doesn’t help that he sleeps with his dog, Sidi, and lets her slobber all over him.

Since Miranda, 24, told him to clean up his act, Orlando has been trying. But, says the source, he’s told friends “he doesn’t know if this relationship will last.”

Okay, I’ll be the first one to admit that I personally believe that we are a bit too germophobic as a society at large (and this from someone who deals with OCD). All this antibacterial this and that is just helping to breed supergerms that will someday destroy us all.

Having said that…I shower every day (even if it is at noon), I wash my hands after I go potty, I do my laundry, and I change my socks and unders at least once a day. Because BO is a no-no. And if Orlando thinks that a supermodel is going to stick around with him and overlook his skidmarks and nasty pits and cruddy socks that stand in the corner on their own, he’s got another think coming. I know he likes being “green”, but you can find “green” laundry detergent and soaps and grooming products.

I mean, for some women that stuff might be a turn-on, but they tend to not shave their legs and eat only organic vegan soybeans and pick their toenails with their teeth and read via candlelight and live on houseboats that sink once a day. I can’t see Orlando doing that. For me, nothing says “This relationship is going nowhere” like week-old pit stains or wearing the same clothes day after day (which he has been photographed doing).

Yeah, think about that the next time you gaze at that poster of Will Turner on your wall. It’s more authentic than you thought…pirates don’t smell like Axe Touch, you know!

Whatchoo gonna do, brutha, when your thang on the side tells all about you!

It’s bad enough when your father decides to do a little boinking on the side, it’s worse when it turns out to be one of your friends.  That’s the dilemma facing Brooke Hogan, because it seems her father, famous wrestler/reality TV star/permissive overindulgent father Hulk Hogan, did just that:

According to a tabloid report, Hulk Hogan, who is divorcing Linda Bollea after nearly twenty-five years of marriage, cheated on his wife with a female friend of his teen daughter Brooke.

Thirty-three year old Christiane Plante, who worked with nineteen year old Brooke on her 2006 LP, has confessed to her affair with the fifty-four year old dad of her friend in a snitching report with The National Enquirer.

Christine claims the affair took place in 2007 while the family was shooting their VH1 reality show Hogan Knows Best:

“My relationship with Terry began at a time when Terry and Linda privately knew their marriage was ending. She had left him already, although no official papers had been filed. Terry is a good man, good father and a good friend, and he and I grew close at a time when he was going through a very difficult period. It seemed right then, but I know it was wrong. Having felt the guilt and pain build up, I gave a note to Brooke apologizing for my actions. I will never be able to fully forgive myself for this. I have lost an amazing friend.”

Hopefully the money she received for the interview she did with the National Enquirer will ease the pain she feels.  After all, nothing says “I’m sorry for banging your dad” like a few hundred thousand dollars worth of tell-all interview.  Unless it’s chocolates.

According to Perez, Brooke is rather upset about the whole thing:

Apparently Brooke is so distraught, she has even posted this ominous entry on her official blog.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

hey….
Current mood: distressed
Category: Life

I’m going through one of the hardest issues i’ve ever had to deal with in my life…please keep me and my family in your prayers…. I’m continuing work in the studio… I’m sure my writing will reflect my state of mind at the moment. I need all the support i can get. thank you…

love you much,
b

Wonder what she’s referring to????

We’re there for ya Brookie!

Update: Brooke also posted the following blog but later deleted it!!!!!!

Saturday, February 23, 2008

i never thought…

Current mood: sad
Category: Life

When your best friend and one of your closest family members that you have loved unconditionally since your first day on this earth, betrays you together, you could MAYBE find it in yourself to forgive one day… but you will NEVER forget the hurt they caused you and how it hurt the people who mean the most to you…its the worst feeling in the world to be betrayed. And worse to know you can never trust the one you should be able to…

“I never thought.”  Yeah, let’s stop right there, because that seems to be the motto of the Bolleas.  Maybe they should engrave that on the family crest, along with two crossed muscular arms, a wrecked automobile, a crushed beer can, a bottle of spray-tan, and a syringe of steroids.

Seriously…after all those steroids over the years, having an affair with the Hulkster is probably like trying to get it on with a jellybean.

I found this on the Youtubes. Wow, David really is a very, very, small little man. It’s like you want to pick him up and pet him and make him your very own.