I’ve not seen any hard evidence, and mind you, I’m just speculating.  So now that we’ve gotten that out of the way…

I’d heard that Amy Winehouse’s performance at the Brits left a lot to be desired, but when I finally got to watch footage I realized just how much she has slid backwards since the Grammys.  In the style of music that Amy sings (I call it a sort of jazz/blues/rock fusion), you can play around a lot with the lyrics and main beat…syncopation and improvisation are the names of the game.  Her performance at the Grammys was a great example of it.

But at the Brits…what a difference.

The problems started long before the performance.  It seems that in the midst of a two-day alcohol bender, Amy tripped and fell on her face while rehearsing, and the shaky rehearsal left programmers wondering if she’d even show up at all…indeed, they were thinking of scrapping her performance altogether.  She eventually arrived at the awards 45 minutes late and did her set with Mark Ronson, apparently attempting to hide behind him during their song Valerie.  (I have yet to see this performance, as all the video I’ve found of it has been pulled.)

Later that night, as she performed her song Love Is A Losing Game (oddly apropos), she was visibly nervous, shaky, and out of time with the music.  She managed to pull it together enough to finish the song, but ended it with a shout-out to Blake Incarcerated-Druggie, which the crowd ignored.

And news is that she not only has trashed her life, but a luxury hotel room as well:

The mucky star has been living in the luxury London hotel since leaving rehab nearly two weeks ago and has refused to let in the cleaners.

Hotel management finally went into her room while Amy was performing at the Brits on Wednesday — and found at least £3,000 worth of damage in the executive suite.

Booze was spilled all over the wooden hallway and cigarette butts, countless bottles of champagne and unwashed knickers were all over the floor.

The blackened bath had to be scrubbed and unclogged after she dyed and washed her famous beehive in the tub.

She had even taken a large mirror off the wall and placed it on the floor. Staff were baffled why. I’m not. […]

Last night Amy was due back at the hotel. God knows what the total bill will be when she finally leaves but staff have already had to replace part of the wooden floor, which was £3,000 alone.

A source said: “It was covered in booze and fag butts, absolutely disgusting. The bed hadn’t been changed since she arrived and most of the room had been used as an ashtray.

“There was dirty underwear everywhere and the place smelt incredibly stale. She had taken a mirror off the wall and laid it on the floor. One can only guess what for. She’d also taken down all the pictures.

“The bath had to be scrubbed and unblocked from balls of matted hair.

“It took three maids two hours to get it in a habitable order.”

 

Lastly, she had an emotional meeting with Blake at Pentonville prison, in which apparently both were in tears even after two hours of conversation.  It would seem his ban on visitors was lifted:

Yesterday a very hungover Amy had a tearful meeting with jailed hubby BLAKE FIELDER-CIVIL — after a two-day bender.

She arrived at London’s Pentonville nick just after 2pm, looking tired and dishevelled.

The singer was in tears as she spoke to Blake through a pane of glass, in a room separate from other prisoners.

Their marriage has been under strain since we revealed Blake has been trading signed photos of her for heroin.

A source revealed: “Amy arrived at the prison looking a bit of mess. She had bags under her eyes and her make-up was smudged. She looked really tired and it was obvious she’d been up all night boozing.

“She was in tears as she spoke to Blake. He kept putting his hand on his forehead and at one point it looked as though he was crying too. It was a very tense conversation.

“Amy stayed the full two hours chatting with Blake and left still looking upset.”

So okay…now comes the editorial part of this article.

First, I’m not so sure that Amy should be out on her own.  She spent a scant two weeks in-house at a rehab center before being let out.  Granted, she is undergoing outpatient therapy, but is that enough when you’ve got a habit as big as Amy’s beehive?  Look at Lindsay Lohan…she spent months inpatient, and she’s still having problems staying on the straight and narrow.

Next, it’s totally disgusting to me that she trashed a hotel room in such a manner.  I’d expect it out of drunken meth addicts at the local Podunkville Motel 6, but not out of an international star staying at a luxury hotel.  Yes, I know that rock-n-rollers have been trashing motel rooms since time immemorial, but hello…it’s usually because they were partying/drunk/high/wasted/all of the above.  A well-grounded person who is not under the influence of anything mind-altering might leave a bit of a mess (after all, not picking up your underwears and leaving some toothpaste in the sink while you’re in a motel room is kind of messy, but not unusual), but they do not take mirrors off walls and use any available surface for an ashtray and leave flooring so bad that it must immediately be replaced.  She’s a famous singer, for cryin’ out loud…she doesn’t have a hair person to come in and dye her hair?  And let’s face it…if she lives in this sort of squalor all the time, then there are bigger issues she needs to address within herself.

And finally…I sincerely hope that this latest row with Blake is the final push she needs to get him out of her life for good.  According to father Mitch, while Amy must take responsibility for her actions, it was Blake who pushed her over the edge to hard drugs:

While Mitch concedes Blake Fielder-Civil is “not entirely responsible” for Amy’s drug problems, he believes they worsened after the two married last year.

Before getting together with Blake, Amy had told her dad she thought class A drugs were “for mugs”.

Blake, 25, is currently languishing in London’s Pentonville prison awaiting trial for GBH and alleged trial fixing.

In an interview with Closer magazine, Mitch said: “He’s not entirely responsible, she’s got to take a portion of the responsibility, but it’s clear, it really kicked off when they got together.” […]

And in a marked contrast to his previous forthright views on Amy’s choice of husband, the former taxi driver admitted that he had learned a bit more about his incarcerated son-in-law, and his background, and realised that “to a certain extent he’s just as much of a victim as Amy”.

Mitch said: “He had a problematic upbringing, he moved out of home at 16 and was homeless in London at 18. That’s why I do have sympathy for him.

“Blake’s got the chance now to prove how much he really loves Amy by staying drug-free. Their marriage can’t survive if they’re together on drugs.

“One or both will die, that’s all there is to it.”

Well, I think Mitch put his finger on it there.  While there is no hard evidence that Amy has relapsed, taking the mirror and pictures down off the walls can’t be a good sign.  The argument could be made that she did it in a drunken state (after all, she seems to be okay with continuing to get drunk), but with her past history, you can’t help but wonder.  And since Blake has been busted more than once for doing drugs while in the pokey, it would seem that he either isn’t taking any thoughts of coming clean seriously, or he is simply unable to while incarcerated.  Either way, he apparently continues his hard-living ways, selling off autographed pics of Amy for drugs.

Which brings me, finally, to the title of this article.  By continuing to give shout-outs for Blake, demonstrating her love for him with her eyeliner tears, and resolutely (some would say stubbornly) standing by her man, i believe that Amy is flushing her career, and life, straight down the toilet.  Take a look at her face, both in the Grammy and Brits performances, when she hollers for Blake…the look on her face is pure defiance, a look of “I dare you to say anything about MAH BLAKE!”  It’s almost as if she’s stubbornly staying with him simply because everyone wants her to leave him.  And if she keeps this up, audiences will tune her out in droves, because they realize that he’s a bloodsucking leech and a millstone ’round her neck, even if Amy herself refuses to admit it.

Who knows?  If Amy has returned to drugs, maybe it’s out of a misguided attempt to sympathize with Blake…maybe her thinking is why should she be clean, when her husband is holed up in prison?  Or perhaps, when she finally looked at her life with a clear mind, it was too much to handle.  There are reasons why people turn to drugs in the first place, and they are rarely happy ones.

I’m not saying Amy has definitely relapsed.  I sincerely hope my thoughts are wrong.  But her onstage performances were so changed between the Grammys and Brits, that I have to stop and wonder just what is going on.  It does seem to me to be more than just an off night, when you put the pieces together.  And I do hope she realizes just what she’s throwing away, before it is too late.