Tom Cruise and Oprah Rematch Part 1, or When Wealthy Folks Visit Each Other
So here it is sweeties. Your play by play of Friday’s Oprah Interview with Tom Cruise. I should state for the record that in general, I tend to be sympathetic of Oprah. She’s not perfect and she has, I think, lousy taste in reading material, but I’ve always liked her and she reminds me of my stepmother, so I tend to cut her slack. However, she managed to break the bonds of my patience this time, although she had the help of Mr. Cruise.
From the start of the interview it was like some nightmarish Robin Leach “When Wealthy Folk Visit Each Other”. Both Katie and Tom were on hand to welcome The Oprah and guide her in to “the mudroom”, where Chez Cruise had provided Oprah with her own brass plated cubby with her own monogrammed slippers to wear around the house. “Let me know if these aren’t comfortable,” says Tom. “I can always get you something else,” which somehow brings to mind a sweatshop in back full of pre-clears busily sewing Oprah labels on the back of an infinite number of slippers. Katie gives her totally authentic sounding contractually obligated “I love you” before leaving to “take the kids into town”.
Others have commented on Oprah’s somewhat tacky obsession, possibly even mania, with money and expensive things. Girlfriend is always bringing up the Benjamins, and not necessarily to her credit. Anyone remember the time she interviewed Anderson Cooper, whose old money mom Gloria Vanderbilt was in the audience, and she started going on about how she’s always impressed by people who don’t have to work who do make something of themselves? You could just see that Cooper was so appalled and mortified. It was a car crash of old money and the nouveau riche.
I’m afraid this unseemly aspect of her personality was in full force. First, she walks in to the huge spotless multi-jillion dollar kitchen which is possibly bigger than the average person’s home and says “It’s just SO NORMAL and kitchen like!” and then proceeds to compliment the wood paneled refrigerator. Show of hands of everyone out there with their fridge paneled to match the rest of their solid oak kitchen. Later, when Tom is showing her all his scripts, which he’s had leather bound, she becomes almost apoplectic over how much he could get for these on eBay, which she insists on repeating multiple times. It was not attractive.
Possibly my favorite moment of “When Wealthy Folk Visit Each Other” comes after visiting the gym, the toy wing, the spotless kitchen and then the dining room, Oprah tells Tom why she loves his home, and this is a direct quote: “[it’s] so earthy and so simple…Oh! There’s the photo that Annie Liebowitz did [of TomKat & Suri for Vanity Fair]”. Uh, yeah. I’m not going to ask for a show of hands for how many of you have an Annie Liebowitz portrait of yourselves on your earthy, simple dining room wall.
Lots of other sites offer a play by play of “the Interview” that follows. Oprah does bring up the “tough” questions, though you get the sense that Tom had received a list of them weeks before hand. As I watched the interview, I realized something about the way Cruise handles interviews which I’ve never witnessed so clearly before. Cruise has two ways of answering questions. Well, technically three.
One is to recite a very carefully rehearsed anecdote which has nothing to do with the topic at hand. Hence we get him telling the (highly suspicious) sounding story of how he himself carefully waxed the floor so his socks would slide for that shot in Risky Business, and later the oh so cute story about how he dressed up like Santa but his genius daughter Suri saw through his sham immediately.
The second similar way he has of answering questions is to repeat a carefully rehearsed sound bite. Thus he repeatedly said in answer to the Oprah Q&A about Brooke Shields “It came out wrong” and “It should be up to the parents”. Since we’re talking about Tom accusing Brooke of ruining her career by taking anti-depressants, and no one said a darn thing about giving drugs to kids, it sounded really weird.
The third way he had of answering questions is to simply repeat the question he’s just been asked in the form of a statement. “Were you surprised?” “Oh…yeah…I was totally…you know…surprised….absolutely surprised.” “Were you prepared [for the crazy fame that followed Risky Business]? I mean, how could you be?” “Oh, no, no, of course not….how could anyone be…prepared” God, I wanted to slap him myself through the TV, and though I haven’t been giving Oprah credit for much in this dog and pony show, I do give her credit for not smacking him.
He declined to say anything substantive about Scientology except “I think it’s best for people to read about it for themselves,” and then quickly reassured the world that respect for other religions is an absolute tenant of faith for Scientology, and OF COURSE he believes in God. I was particularly interested in how he handled Oprah’s questions about whether he was preventing Nicole from having access to the children. He described their relationship as “good, easy”, and “we share custody, that’s what we do.” Then, in case we didn’t get that, he said again that they “share custody, whenever”. So, whenever what? Whenever Nicole makes up her mind to move back to LA and stops behaving like a Suppressive Person?
Honestly, it’s hard to tell sometimes if Cruise is a lousy liar or just a lousy interview. Perhaps it’s the same difference. I have no doubt that he’ll be totally controlled and perfect for Monday’s chapter in front of a live audience, especially since the whole point of the show is to laud him for a movie which most people barely remember from twenty five years ago. Yay! Let’s pretend we all care! Yay!
I don’t think I can bear to watch it. Best of luck to you if you manage!!
[Above is a guest post from KT at Populucious, please visit often, and thx KT]
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Oprah’s not just obsessed with money and stuff, she’s obsessed with “celebrity”. She practically salivates around her guests. It’s really rather embarrassing to watch. And it’s sad to see when compared to how blase she is with “plain folk”, you know, the kind who do heroic things or have accomplished amazing things.
Comment by Joanie — May 5, 2008 @ 9:23 am
Hehe, Tom. How about a little mea culpa? Nothing is your fault and why are you re-writing history? You remember that all your previous words at the Lauer intervew, your video where you were talking to “your congregation” are still out there, right?
What is this about you and Kidman sharing custody? Are the children in Nashville, you know that city that is just about 4 hours away from LA? or do you expect her to pack her bags to come live in LA because you say so? Why don’t you buy a house in Nashville if you are thinking of being inconvenienced?
Liar never prosper Tom, remember that.
Oh, why didn’t that “Tigress” wife of yours stay during the interview to defend her family and why on earth were you not in that Holmes family picture that looked like it was taken long before you met your wife. And are you sure people live in that beautiful house of yours, nothing was out of place, not even one of Suri’s toys was littering the place and yet, you want us to believe that you have 2 teenagers living with you?
Comment by Anon — May 5, 2008 @ 9:44 am
Oprah fed him the answers in her questions.
“Objection, your honor, leading the witness.”
Shameful.
Comment by marcab — May 5, 2008 @ 9:54 am
oprah had little credibility before this interview…and NONE now. lol.
Comment by meh — May 5, 2008 @ 9:56 am
Doprah needs to do a little research into Cruise’s belief system. Here’s a sample of L.Ron Hubbard the racist: http://www.solitarytrees.net/racism/deny.htm
Comment by Sponge — May 5, 2008 @ 10:25 am
All hail Oprah, Queen of Cults.
Shameful…
Comment by terryeo [tmcrxs] — May 5, 2008 @ 10:59 am
I remember Risky Business quite clearly, though thankfully not for Tom Cruise, but for a really righteous Porsche 928 and Rebecca DeMornay. I try very hard to block Tom Cruise’s cornball “acting” from memory.
And Oprah sucks a$$ inside out. I’m surprised that she hasn’t had people read her own checkbook for her book club.
Comment by Pat — May 5, 2008 @ 1:05 pm
I came away from the interview feeling like there was nothing Cruise really said. Did anyone notice that Oprah was the one who said *I love you* back to Holmes but Cruise never said anything. Cruise didn’t even look at Holmes when she left. But he still swears up and down how incredible Katie is and strong and how he never felt this way about anyone but he didn’t even turn around to say I love you when Katie was obviously speaking to him. Okaaay.
He said that the Brooke Shileds comment should have come out differently which sounds to me like he would have still said the same thing but differently. Whatever that means. I didn’t understand why it took him so long to apologize to Shields anyway. It was like a year or something. That says to me he was really sorry about what he said.
I liked Oprah more in her early years. She was more like US. She was really an everywoman. Now I just get tired of these love fests with other celebrities and I don’t feel like she really connects with her audience like she did before.
Comment by Halli — May 5, 2008 @ 2:58 pm
[…] Our friends at Glosslip weigh in. (actually its guest blogger "KT at Populucious") GlossLip Tom Cruise and Oprah Rematch Part 1, or When Wealthy Folks Visit Each Other Highlights to look for when you read it: –comparison of Oprah to Robin Leach –subtle […]
Pingback by Tracklist: Mass Media mentions of the Cruise/Oprah lovefest - Page 2 - Enturbulation.org Activism Forums — May 5, 2008 @ 5:55 pm
Everytime I hear about Nicole Kidman being declared or leaving the church or wanting to get the kids out of Scientology and disconnection I have to laugh because according to all the gossip news: if she had been declared, her adopted kids would have had to disconnnect from her; If she actually said she wanted to get the kids out of Scientology she would have been declared; If she had left Scientology she would have been declared; If she were suppressive she would have been declared; If she had bought a house in LA, she would have a house in LA.
Comment by KathyG — May 5, 2008 @ 9:40 pm
KathyG, the reason Kidman has not been declared is because it will not look good for Tom Cruise who is publicly fronting a cult that says that scientology is all about keeping families together. Nothing is going to have her declared, the most Cruise can do is act as if she doesn’t exist on the basis that she is the ex-wife.
Bad move to get a house in LA, what the children need is to get away from the environment but how on earth will that happen without splitting up their lives further? While people are going on about how she should go and take those kids away from Cruise and the cult, are they aware of how fractured their lives already are? Only for the Grace of God.
Comment by Anon — May 5, 2008 @ 10:55 pm
“Honestly, it’s hard to tell sometimes if Cruise is a lousy liar or just a lousy interview.”
It doesn’t have to be either/or. Actually, he’s both.
Comment by cvanony — May 5, 2008 @ 11:12 pm
This is in answer to Anon (comment #2): Tom’s teenage children do not live with him; they actually live with his SISTER in LA.
Oh, and I love how he says he felt pressured during the Lauer interview. It’s on youtube. Just search “Lauer Cruise”. Yeah, Tom, real pressure there. I don’t know which is worse. Cruise sitting there lying or Oprah not calling him on it. Of course, it’s hard to s*ck c*ck and talk at the same time.
Comment by cvanony — May 5, 2008 @ 11:18 pm
Actually Tom’s sister, Tom’s children, Tom’s mother and anyone else Tom can lure inside the gates all live together in Hacianda del Cruise in LA. So technically yes, his kids live with his sister, but his sister lives with him. One big happy family!
Comment by Kati — May 6, 2008 @ 1:04 pm
Thanks for a good read, KT.
“an absolute tenet of faith” fix’d.
Comment by Plups — May 10, 2008 @ 6:42 pm