Last week I wrote about the sad story of 2-year old Caylee Marie Anthony, who was missing for close to a month before her grandmother reported her missing. What has happened since is a quagmire of deception, treachery and a tragically dysfunctional family.

While those following this story continue searching for clues as to what may have happened to little Caylee, a website has posted an extremely chilling and in-depth timeline of events. No small feat considering the vast amount of lies and covering up that’s been done by Caylee’s mother, Casey (currently in jail on a $500k bond for neglect and obstruction) and Casey’s family, including her duplicitous mother Cindy, clueless father George, and inept brother Lee.

The following timeline borrowed from The Criminal Report Daily, who did a TREMENDOUS job putting all of this together. Please visit for documents and audio related to this case, I am only posting the timeline itself. I offer my predictions after the report, and I encourage you to post your thoughts as to what may have happened to the sweet, innocent Caylee.

But wait, there’s more…

Shia LeBeouf, actor, dumbass, poor choice maker

Sunday morning, around 2:45 am, Shia LeBeouf made a poor choice (a term I use with my kids). Although in actuality, the poor choice began when he decided to get behind the wheel after drinking WAY too much, minor details folks.

Back to 2:45 am. This is apparently when Shia and his unidentified female passenger, were struck by another vehicle which caused his truck to roll over on its roof. While Shia’s passenger and the other drive sustained minor injuries, Shia had to be admitted to the hospital to have surgery on his hand, but only after he was arrested on misdemeanor DUI charges. Shia is extremely lucky the other parties’ injuries were minor, or he would have been charged with a felony DUI, and subjected to more severe punishment. From the CNN report:

LaBeouf was trying to make a left turn at a West Hollywood intersection around 3 a.m. when his pickup collided with another vehicle, rolling the truck over, Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Sgt. Scott Wolf said.

“It was immediately apparent to officers responding on the scene that LaBeouf was intoxicated and he was subsequently placed under arrest,” Wolf said.

Wolf said LaBeouf was booked then released for misdemeanor DUI. The 22-year-old actor was taken to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center and was being treated for injuries to his left hand and a knee, as well as a minor head injury, Wolf said.

Shia’s spokesperson released this statement:

“Attorneys for Mr. LaBeouf confirm that an automobile accident involving an additional party occurred early morning in Los Angeles on July 27, 2008. Shia is currently recovering from extensive hand surgery with plans to return to work on the set of ‘Transformers 2′ within one month. No further comment will be issued at this time.”

Shia, 22, who had been enjoying his box office success starring opposite Harrison Ford in the Indiana Jones 4 film, is no stranger to trouble, but this is his worst incident thus far. Shia has previously been cited for smoking in a non-smoking area in Burbank and for unlawful trespassing at a Chicago Walgreens. Both charges were dropped, which is NOT likely to happen with his current DUI charges. Shia also had a video surface recently showing him drunk and encouraging a friend to punch him, which included the use of gay slur. Clearly the kid has a drinking problem.

Shia now joins a growing club of Hollywood’s less than stellar stars who’ve been busted for drinking and driving, proving that this group is too stupid to learn from the mistakes of others. I find it especially galling that these stars get themselves into this kind of trouble because unlike us regular folks, they have handlers, assistants and loads of cash to keep them from making poor choices. Why not call a cab, why not call your assistant to pick you up? Why not hire a limo for the evening if you know you will be drinking too much.

Shia, I have defended you in the past. I have declared you one of the good ones, who was a bit on the edge, but smart enough to make decent decisions about your life. You have a history of drug dependency in your family and I would think you’d take that into consideration when make life choices. I am not going to tell you I am surprised you were busted, but I will tell you you’ve lost a fan. You could have killed someone, an innocent person, because you showed no regard for the safety of others. For your sake, I hope they throw the book at you so you will learn a valuable lesson.

Now do me a favor, don’t show up in the police blotter ever again, and I may forgive you some day.

Dumbass.

What do you call two short dudes, dressed in leather who believe their bodies are infected with alien spirits?

There’s no punchline, I’m just at a loss as to what to call the sheer queerness being exuded from these two weirdos. And I mean queer in the classic sense of the word.

Well, it’s good to know that Tom Cruise hasn’t alienated all his friends. His best buddy David Miscavige, leader of the Church of Scientology is still in his corner. No, seriously, I think the guy sleeps in the corner of Tom Cruise’s bedroom and watches him sleep. I’ll bet Katie really enjoys the subtle nuances of their “bro-mance.”

Image courtesy of IDLYITW via Enturbulation.org.

Caylee Anthony, Missing Since June

Please excuse me while I part from celeb news to discuss something which is weighing heavily on my mind. If I didn’t cover celeb news, I’d be vying for Nancy Grace’s job on CNN, with a slightly less annoying voice. Only slightly less.

So about ten days ago a story broke on CNN about a toddler who was missing for more than month before her disappearance was reported to the police. The grandmother of the missing girl, Cindy Anthony, reported her granddaughter, Caylee Anthony, as missing after questioning her 22-year old daughter, Casey Anthony, and getting no real answers. Finally, according Cindy her daughter Casey stated her daughter was kidnapped by the babysitter. Mrs. Anthony (the grandmother) called police and reported the missing child.

Ok, let’s fast-forward a bit here because the facts (if you can call them that) are so convoluted, bizarre and difficult to keep track of, that in order for me to accurately present this story would take about five pages. So I will boil it down.

But wait, there’s more…

Remember the Waffle House deal?  Kid Rock, aka Bob Ritchie, was sentenced to a year’s probation and a fine of $1000, plus eighty hours of community service and sixty hours of anger management counseling for his part in it:

The October incident involved a predawn fight at the suburban restaurant after Rock’s gig at Atlanta’s Tabernacle. According to reports, a man named Harlen Akins, 39, got into a verbal altercation with a female friend who was accompanying Rock’s crew. The argument escalated into a physical scuffle in the parking lot with Rock and five members of his entourage, during which Akins allegedly broke a window at the restaurant. Rock and his crew allegedly hopped on their tour bus and drove off, but cops stopped them and arrested Rock and the five other men on misdemeanor battery charges.

After Rock pleaded no contest to one count of simple battery in the case, four other counts of battery were dropped. Guitarist Jason E. Krause and group member James W. Murphy pleaded no contest and got similar sentences, while charges were dropped against the other three men. Rock’s attorney said his client was “not terribly unhappy” with the sentence, though he still didn’t think the brawl was his fault.

What?  Bob don’t need no anger management.  Level-headed and serene, that’s our Bob.  He’s so laid back he’s practically comatose.  He just shoulda got outta there faster after he chased everyone once around the parking lot in his tour bus, that’s all.  Uneasy rider indeed.

In case you’re wondering just what did happen, here’s some video of the fight.  Six on one, huh?  Make up your own minds.

I don’t know if this counts as celeb news or not, but since I do kinda like Rush (see, Dawn, my musical tastes aren’t that bad), I thought it was cool.  They gots some gaming skillz.  And my son wants to be Neil Peart, so I have to listen to a lot of Tom Sawyer.

Media personality and talk show host Michael Savage is known for being a bit of a loose cannon (read:douchebag). It’s his job to make controversial statements, offend the masses and be somewhat of a fire-starter in order to drum up ratings. This however, does not give him the right to ignore facts, medical professionals, historical data and general perceptions of reality.

Savage, whose show appears on the TalkRadioNetwork has mostly conservative views and is listed as the third most popular conservative radio host in the country. Savage is also a major homophobe and was fired from MSNBC for making some very insensitive comments to caller who was pranking the host. Who had the last laugh there?!

So what’s Micahel Savage done now? Oh, not much, just bash a bunch of physiologically challenged children and their parents. Savage, had the audacity to call autism a “fraud, a racket” as well as stating the following about the children diagnosed with autism and the parents of these afflicted children:

“Now the illness du jour is autism,” Savage said. “You know what autism is? I’ll tell you what autism is. In 99 percent of the cases, it’s a brat who hasn’t been told to cut the act out. That’s what autism is.”

“What do you mean they scream and they’re silent?” Savage added. “They don’t have a father around to tell them, ‘Don’t act like a moron. You’ll get nowhere in life. Stop acting like a putz. Straighten up. Act like a man. Don’t sit there crying and screaming, idiot.’ ”

Now you don’t have to be a bleeding heart liberal or even a person with 3rd grade education to see the issue with the above statement from Savage. Clearly the guy is an ignorant, unread, unsophisticated, lazy-ass rabble-rouser. Having witnessed children with autism first hand and the parents who are desperate to try and help these children, it floors me that someone would make such a statement.

When you compare a “normal” kid’s behavior, to a child with autism, the differences are marked and disconcerting. Autistic children are hyper-sensitive to a variety of outside influences such as noise, smell, light, as well as, foods, textures and the moods of others. Handling these children so as to ease their emotions and sensitivities requires a lot of love, patience and hand-ons parenting.

I am all for disciplining one’s children, but there’s a huge difference between behavioral issues with “normal” kids and those with bona fide emotional issues stemming from a disability. I have tremendous respect for parents of children who must dig deep for reserves of understanding and compassion for the special needs of their kids.

So, essentially, because Michael Savage spends his time looking down on anyone and everyone whom he deems beneath him and raging on them through jaded eyes of ignorance, he has essentially cast doubt into the minds of millions of listeners of his show of the existence of a very real illness and the inherent struggles and difficulties of dealing with children with autism.

Great job Michael, what’s next? Punching a litter of kittens, slapping babies for pooping, spitting on Alzheimer’s patients? How about you shut yer cakehole assface and do some research before you go spouting off a the mouth. Go to the library, volunteer at a children’s hospital, feed the needy, do something useful you cancer on society.

For more on autism, go here. It’s real and it can be heartbreaking for anyone who knows a child who suffers.

Who’s slip needs to be just a bit higher? Hint…don’t tick off her mother. Or her dad. He might mumble at you.

Answer after the jump!

But wait, there’s more…

Actress Sienna Miller has been making the pages of all the redtops over in the UK for her promiscuous ways.  Add Balthazar Getty, himself no paragon of virtue, throw in a yacht and a sunny climate, dispense with the bikini tops, and you’ve got the makings of a little scandal going.  In case you haven’t been following, Sienna and Balthazar, a married father of four, have been spotted sneaking around, meeting in Prague and playing around on a boat, in full view of the world.

It seems that Balthazar has finally admitted that his marriage is over:

Sienna Miller’s lover Balthazar Getty has publicly announced his marriage to Rosetta Getty, the mother of his four children, is over.

It comes just a week after steamy pictures of the actor and scantily clad Sienna were spotted cavorting around while holidaying on the Amalfi coast.

He said in a statement: ‘The breakdown of a marriage is a very difficult and painful experience especially when children are involved.

‘In light of the fact that many pictures have surfaced in print and on the Internet which has caused myself and my family great embarrassment, I felt it necessary to at least acknowledge publicly that yes indeed my wife and I have separated and I will not be commenting any further.’

This, after photos surfaced of he and a topless Sienna kissing on a yacht in Italy.  So much for their continued denials of a relationship.

Look, I realize that sometimes a marriage just breaks down and there’s nothing that you can do to save it.  I’m not a big fan of divorce, but I realize that sometimes it happens.  But at least get the divorce first before you start in with another woman, huh?  That’s really just crass.  Separated does not mean divorced.  I mean, this guy is married with four kids.  What is he doing hanging around with Sienna Miller?

Besides, does he really want to throw away his marriage for Sienna, by all accounts a serial maneater?  Does anybody remember why she and Jude Law broke up?  Yep, it was because he was having an affair with the nanny for his children by his ex-wife Sadie Frost…who became Jude’s ex-wife because Sienna had an affair with him.  And that’s just one of the scandals concerning her.  What’s to say he won’t end up as just another notch on the bedpost?

Sienna once said this about Daisy Wright, the nanny with whom Jude Law had an affair:

‘Daisy better live in fear. I’m quite looking forward to the days when our paths will cross, which I know they will. I just hope that woman doesn’t run into me in a dark alley.’

For Sienna’s sake, she’d better hope Rosetta Getty doesn’t feel the same way, although who could blame her if she did.

Reports out of London say that Batman, Christian Bale, was arrested there after allegedly assaulting his mom and sister:

The Hollywood actor was questioned for four hours at a central London police station and later released on bail to a date in September pending further inquiries.

Bale, 34, is alleged to have lashed out at his mother Jenny, 61, and sister Sharon, 40, in his suite at Park Lane’s Dorchester Hotel on Sunday. [...]

Bale was arrested just hours after he attended the first European screening of the new Batman blockbuster, The Dark Knight.

To tell the truth, I don’t know much about Christian Bale except that he’s the title character in the new Batman movie and Dawn thinks he’s hhhhhhhot. But from what I’ve read about him, he’s a talented actor right on the brink of making it really big. I hope that this is a misunderstanding that got blown out of proportion and not a symptom of something larger.

Dawn and I talked yesterday on BTR Today about how preparing for the role of the Joker had such a detrimental effect on Heath Ledger’s psyche, to the point of depression and serious insomnia for which he took prescriptions to attempt to control. Perhaps the dark tone of the movie got to more than just Heath, because this seems to be out of character for Christian. After all, they had just come from the premiere, and perhaps seeing the movie and Heath’s character was upsetting…but that’s a complete guess on my part. Maybe mom just got annoying and he hollered at her. Or maybe it’s all just a big misunderstanding.

But Christian. Dude. Big-time movie premiere, red carpet, swanky hotel suite…come on, let’s all be cool and not go all chav. Just learn a lesson and move on, because I really hate to see young stars ruin themselves right from the start, y’know?

Update by D: Christian Bale’s spokespeople release statement:

“Christian Bale attended a London Police station today, on a voluntary basis, in order to assist with an allegation that had been made against him to the police by his mother and sister. Mr Bale who denies the allegation, co-operated throughout, gave his account in full of the events in question, and has left the station without any charge being made against him by the Police.

At this time, there will be no further comment by Mr Bale.”

Other reports are stating Christian was arrested on “VERBAL ASSAULT” charges which are classified a 4 and 5 in British penal codes. We still aren’t entirely sure what the argument stemmed from, but apparently the altercation took place BEFORE the premiere, and Bale turned himself in afterwards for questioning. Again, we don’t know what happened, but Bale’s never had any issues before, and for his mom and sister to rat him out like that just before his big premiere, for VERBAL assault no less, is low, cheap and really twisted. Some family.

On a sidenote, if there were such a law here in the U.S., I’d be serving a life sentence. I am well-known for unleashing verbal assaults on a pretty regular basis. But those on the receiving end were totally asking for it.