We haven’t heard from Amy Winehouse in a while, mainly because she’s been soaking up the fun and the sun on St. Lucia.  So let’s see if we can do a quick recap of everyone’s favorite reality soap opera, As The Beehive Turns.

The last time we visited Amy, she was crawling around on all fours begging for drinks and ciggies because the hotel in St. Lucia had been ordered not to serve her any more…in Dawn’s favorite description of her, she would distract a fellow guest and then, when they weren’t looking, grab their drink and sprint away “like a squirrel with a nut.”  I can just see her now:  “”ere now guv, ovah dere, ain’t it Lily Allen?”  “Where?”  *grabs drink and scuttles off*

However, all good things must come to an end, and Amy decided it was time to pack up her sunscreen and head back to Londontown…but oh, the hijinks to be had on the way!  First, during the flight on her way back from her tropical paradise, Amy politely requested that a fellow passenger stop looking at her:

The troubled singer, 25, lashed out at a man she thought was “giving her the eye”.

Back to Black singer Amy cut short her epic holiday in St Lucia after she discovered husband Blake Fielder-Civil, 26, had been freed from jail.

She flew back to London in a bid to save her turbulent marriage — but had to be pulled off a passenger.

A pal said: “Amy went wild. She thought this guy was giving her strange looks and just lost it.

“She was nervous about coming back and seeing Blake so it didn’t take much to push her over the edge.”

Next, she arrived home to find that her address had changed:

Upon her return, Amy moved from Camden, north London to a new home in Barnet, not far from where her mother Janis lives.

Her new gated property is just a few miles from Southgate, where she grew up.

Amy’s parents Mitch and Janis are hoping her new life in the suburbs will keep her away from the crazy party lifestyle she led in Camden, and that no doubt contributed to her ill health.

It seems that her divorce to Blake Formerly-Incarcerated-Deux is still on, despite her apparent change of heart:

The singer is said to want to give their marriage another try, despite the former music video assistant insisting divorce proceedings are still going ahead.

Blake was jailed in November 2007 for assault and attempting to pervert the course of justice and was sentenced to 27 months behind bars last July.

Last November, he was given permission to leave jail early on the condition he went to rehab, but was returned to custody after failing a drug test a few weeks later.

Blake walked free from Edmunds Hill Prison in Suffolk last Thursday and was greeted by his mother and Sophie before going to the family home in Claypole, Lincolnshire.

Speaking about his impending divorce, Blake said: ‘It’s all going ahead - but I don’t really know what will happen.

‘It’s just nice to be on the outside again. Now I am going to get over my drug habit.’

Speaking of Blake, just what has he been up to?

In a huge blow to the singer BLAKE FIELDER-CIVIL is said to be “besotted” with FRANCESCA MORRALEE, 17, who he has been seeing since filing for divorce from the troubled star.

The pair have NOT yet consummated their relationship but have written ’stacks’ of love letters to each other while he was behind bars and declared their feelings in emotional phone calls.

Fran’s family are ‘aware’ of the relationship.

The pal said: “They are willing to give him a chance. As long as he doesn’t hurt Fran they are ok with it.” [...]

Blake’s mum this week denied Blake had cheated on Amy. She said: “Blake’s been a bad lad when it comes to drugs but he hasn’t once cheated on Amy.

“He has a close circle of friends who have helped him through prison. They’ve been there for Blake when his own wife wasn’t.

“But he’s not got another woman - absolutely not. The last thing he wants right now is another relationship.”

[Francesca] has also told pals that she’s “so in love” with the 26-year-old. [...]

A friend said: “They are trying to keep the whole thing under wraps.

“It’s been going on since him and Amy separated. He filed for divorce and only then did he ask her out officially.

“They tell each other that they love each other. They seem so happy together he is absolutely devoted to her even though it is early days.

“He has promised her he wants nothing to do with Amy. She speaks to his mum every day and tries to get through to Blake but he doesn’t want to know.

“Georgette has also reassured her that he has cut all ties with Amy. Blake is in rehab now but when he gets out they want to live together.”

And speaking of court procedures, Amy is being sued for a little spat where she punched a fan:

She is accused of common assault on dancer Sherene Flash, 30.

Amy, 25, is said to have punched Sherene’s face when asked to pose for a photo at an End of Summer Ball in London last September.

A string of previous arrests over allegations of possessing drugs and attacking people had only resulted to Amy being cautioned before.

But the Rehab singer was charged when she attended London’s Charing Cross police station at 11am on Thursday. She failed to show up on at least two previous occasions.

Amy, just returned from the Caribbean, was arrested and questioned before a sergeant read out the charge.

She was released on bail to appear at City of Westminster Magistrates Court on March 17. [...]

One pal said: “Amy is worried. But she is determined to get through it and sees the case as a hangover from her past.”

And that night, lest you think we now are going to see a kinder, gentler Amy, she got drunk and started climbing the walls:

[...] hours after being held and charged, the recovering junkie drunkenly ran wild at a party.

On Thursday night she shocked partygoers with her antics after swigging vodka at the Oxjam charity bash in Selfridges’ London store.

An onlooker said: “She was clearly drunk. She knocked candles off a display unit, then started climbing up a bookshelf.”

Amy is planning a return to live performing:

She will return to the stage in the last of a star-studded series of gigs to celebrate Island Records’ 50th anniversary with a concert at London’s Shepherds Bush Empire on May 31. [...]

Amy will be supported at her Island gig by her idols TOOTS & THE MAYTALS — the legendary Sixties Jamaican ska band whose song Monkey Man she covers.

It will be her first time on stage since her less than stellar appearances at festivals last year, including a Glastonbury performance that ended in a brawl.

So what does she want to do now?  Conquer the United Sta…oh wait:

[...] the charges brought against her last week after she allegedly punched a fan mean she can’t get a visa to work in America. [...]

Amy’s US ban comes as she was due in California to play the huge Coachella Festival in April, alongside SIR PAUL McCARTNEY, THE KILLERS, THE CURE and FRANZ FERDINAND.

A source said: “It’s almost certain Amy won’t be playing in America for the foreseeable future. But she now knows she has to concentrate on rebuilding her reputation here.”

So there you have it.  It’s kind of the same old/same old, but with a few new twists.  Amy does seem to look about a zillion times better than she has in recent memory, but it remains to be seen if the effects of her trip to the tropics will wear off sooner rather than later.  Because, like I’ve said before about Amy…wherever you go, there you are.  Your problems are always going to be inside you no matter where you’re at, and it is better to deal with them than to try and cover them up with a nice tan.  Hopefully, this is what she did while she was gone…anyone know if there is an operating rehab center on St. Lucia?

I want to believe the best…but we’ll see.

Remember that post I did earlier on Amy Winehouse?  Well…new information has come to light.  It seems that Amy, for all everyone believes she is getting clean on her little vacay in the sun, is allegedly resorting to stealing the drinks of other hotel patrons, begging for booze, and generally acting weird:

WASTED AMY WINEHOUSE is reduced to crawling up to holidaymakers and grabbing their drinks — after fed-up resort staff refused to serve her.

The sneaky singer also BEGS guests to order booze for her at the all-inclusive Caribbean resort.

Bizarrely Amy, who has fought addictions to drugs and alcohol, is at the posh Le Sport Spa on the sunshine isle of St Lucia for a HEALTH KICK.

Each day seems to start with good intentions as she limbers up with yoga-style stretches before swinging into action on exercise rings.

But by lunchtime bikini-clad Amy is relaxing with a drink on the beach or even openly smoking joints by the pool.

Come nightfall and she is hitting the bottle with pals — despite the booze ban agreed by her management and staff.

A source at the £200-a-night resort said: “We keep catching her crawling past bars, or hiding behind chairs. She grabs guests’ drinks and runs off, like a squirrel with a nut.” [...]

Amy’s management have now hired a 6ft 6ins minder to keep her in line — but to little effect.

She was spotted creeping up behind one woman, asking for a cigarette and then sprinting away with her cocktail.

Another guest said: “She’s like a child craving attention. It’s embarrassing. She comes in for dinner barefoot and in her bikini, even though the dress code is smart casual.

“Then she will go and sit on her balcony topless playing the guitar when everyone is trying to sleep.”

But Amy — who has extended her two-week stay for another TWO MONTHS — was overheard on her mobile reassuring her father Mitch, 57: “I’ve been eating well and I feel great. I’ve only had a few drinks, Dad — honest.”

And of course, there aren’t any newspapers or internet access in the UK for him to find out what is going on.  She’s totally in the clear!

Like I said earlier…wherever you go, there you are.  Amy isn’t cured…she’s just taken her problems for a road trip.  She doesn’t need fun in the sun, she needs intensive rehabbing and counseling.  I’m all for quirky behavior, nothing wrong with that.  But there’s a huge difference between quirky behavior and pathetic behavior.

I mean, yeah…it is The Sun.  But I am having a hard time figuring out what else she would be doing crawling around on all fours outside a restaurant.  If she wants people to believe that she’s clean, maybe she could start by not acting like she’s not clean.  And speaking of not clean, I hope they have washing machines at that resort,  because I’ve seen those same grubby cutoffs in just about every photo of Amy taken recently…

Who would have thought that it would be Blake Incarcerated-Again who would be the one filing divorce papers?  Everybody expected Amy to dump him, especially since it is said that she recently claimed she was taking a sunny vacation just to wait for Blaaaaake:

After Amy Winehouse was pictured in the arms of a clean-cut young actor, friends may have hoped she was finally about to ditch her jailbird husband.

Yet the singer has announced that she plans to return to him – after she has spent six months in the Caribbean.

Amy, 25, has told friends she wants to stay on St Lucia until she can be reunited with Blake Fielder-Civil, who began serving his latest prison term in December.

She appeared to have abandoned her marriage after becoming close to actor Joshua Bowman, 21, while staying at the luxury Le Sport spa on the island.

Yet far from thinking of divorcing the man who introduced her to heroin and crack cocaine, Amy plans to stick by him in spite of his conviction for assault and perverting the course of justice. [...]

However, they say Amy has begun drinking again and is merely flirting with other men while she ‘waits’ for her husband.

‘Amy was walking through the resort with the ‘other Blake’ [Wood] on Thursday, and they were looking quite kissy and cuddly,’ said an acquaintance who overheard the encounter.

‘She spotted her friend Stan Clayton, the owner of Mustique’s Firefly Hotel, and loudly announced, ‘It’s great here. I’m staying for six months, waiting for my husband to come out of jail.’

‘It was strange. She was saying she intends going back to her husband and this other Blake character was just sitting there, looking as if he couldn’t care less.

‘They all had lunch and then she went down to the topless beach. On Friday night she made a spectacle of herself again. She got trashed on wine.’

But the most recent news is that she says she’s in love and that her marriage to Blaaaaaaake was based on drugs, drugs, and something called drugs…which, predictably, ticked off Blaaaaaaake enough to file for the Big D:

Celebrity lawyer Henri Brandman told MailOnline that Blake had instructed him to launch the action on the grounds of Amy’s adultery. It is thought that Blake will go for half of Amy’s £10 million fortune.

The move comes as loved-up Amy told a Sunday newspaper that she has finally kicked her drug habit. The star also admitted that she had ‘forgotten I’m even married’ to Blake, claiming ‘our whole marriage was based on doing drugs’. [...]

Contrary to earlier reports that she was waiting for Blake to join her on the island, the singer told the newspaper: “I love it here and have never felt so happy.

“In fact, I don’t think I’m ever going home.

“Especially as I met Josh here. He couldn’t be more different from my husband, which isn’t a bad thing.”

She also branded Blake ‘rubbish in bed’, adding, ‘Almost every time I slept with him it was like I was dead’.

Well, now.  So taking a vacay to St. Lucia was just what the doctor ordered to get Amy off drugs, huh.  Clinics, doctors, rehab, none of that worked, but going off to a tropical island and finding a new beau was what she needed.  Get my skeptical crayon, because that’s what I’m going to have to color this picture she’s drawn.

You see, what Amy has to realize is something most of us have had to come face to face with…wherever you go, there you are.  That means that her problems weren’t left in London when she hopped on that plane…she packed them in her suitcases, she put them in her purse, she loaded them in her pockets.  A change of scenery is often good to get our minds off our problems and the stuff we deal with, but what happens when the new, exciting vacation with new, exciting people becomes the same old drudgery with the same boring folks?

People like Amy crave not only drugs, but excitement.  She’s got to have constant drama in her life, constant upheaval, continuous movement.  I think that’s one reason why her little trip to the islands has seemed to “work”…it’s a change and she needs change.  The thing is…will she still be clean (and we don’t know for sure that she truly is) in six months?  In a year?  When she moves back to London?  If she dumps this new guy?  Even if she decides to live in St. Lucia?

Don’t get me wrong.  I truly hope Amy can conquer her addictions.  I want to see Amy clean as much as anyone does, and I’ll be the first one in her corner (as I was when she performed at the Grammys) if she can truly stay clean.  I realize that kicking drugs is a moment-to-moment decision and a slip doesn’t mean the person has failed…you just have to get up and start again.  I just hope that she sees this trip is a temporary respite from her normal life, and that she must keep this “clean” mindset once she rejoins “normal” life.  We all, Amy included, shouldn’t jump to conclusions that Amy is “cured”.

Oh, and Blake Incarcerated-Divorcer and his little filing?  That would be the best thing to happen to Amy since she discovered the beehive.  I do think it’s a little rich of Amy to put the blame for her bad marriage on Blake, but then again these two aren’t exactly deep, introspective thinkers.  From Blake’s blaming himself for introducing Amy to drugs to his own lack of interest in honoring his marriage vows, I find it hard to muster up any sympathy for this guy.  However, one minute he’s acting like a total jerkface and the next he’s saying how much he loves Amy and wants to help her…wow, I can see why she had to take drugs when she was with Blaaaaaaaaaaake.  I need a Midol myself just to finish this paragraph about him.

Now, about that “Blake” tattoo…

Our favorite little crackhead and soul singer Amy Winehouse seems to have found a new shoulder to cry on, or at least suck her thumb on. Seriously, what’s with sucking the thumb?

According to these photos, the still-married, often-troubled star from Camden has spent the holidays on St. Lucia getting some much needed R & R (and some food and sun too, thankfully) and while letting her weave breathe, she’s some how attracted a real man. And by real man we mean one with muscles, body hair, no visible tattoos and he seems to have all his teeth intact. In fact, I’d say this fellow of Amy’s is downright handsome.

It’s great to see that Amy has gained a bit of weight and put some color on her white, pasty, clammy skin. If it weren’t for her horrifying grill (whitening strips and a trip to the dentist could make a WORLD of difference in this young woman) she’d look downright, well, ok.

Absent from this holiday is the sun (nod to you Brits) is estranged husband and fellow crackhead Blaaaaaaaaaake Fielder-Civil, and clearly not missed. Amy and Blake have not seen each other since their brief shag, visit while Amy was still in a clinic recovering from a “lung infection”. Since then Blake has been returned to jail after violating his early release when he failed a drug test in rehab. Stupid is as stupid does. Fortunately, being the affable bloke Blake is, he made some new friends back in jail.

Amy, pictured above with her new man, Jooooooosssshhhhua Bowman, seems a little like her old self, though clearly a bit less fresh than she used to be. Josh, a former rugby player/actor?, met Amy while he was vacationing with his family in the Caribbean, and had blabbed to the tabs about it:

“She’s just a cool girl, very nice, and we’re just very friendly,” is said to be on the island with his mother and sister. He is a former player with rugby team Saracens and has since turned to acting.

He adds of his new friend, “She’s a good laugh – she is such a lovely girl and on great form. I can’t say much more than that.”

Also in Amy news, she has dropped an appeal on a drug charge stemming from an arrest for marijuana possession in Norway, and has paid a fine which means she won’t have to appear in court on January 12. Lucky Norway. But just in case you thought the crazy train rolled out of the station, rest assured, Amy still has a long way to go before we can call her “cured.” Evidence after the jump NSFW, I REPEAT, NSFW.

But wait, there’s more…

In what seems to be a rather candid and stunning interview, Amy Winehouse’s husband Blake Formerly-Incarcerated admits that he is the one who introduced Amy to drugs, cutting, and the high life:

Blake Fielder-Civil, spoke of the extent of their drug-taking, how he introduced his wife to hard drugs, and his fear as she collapsed with a seizure after an all-day binge.

The music video assistant, who is currently in a drug rehabilitation centre, broke down as he told the News of the World how Amy, 25, asked him to let her try crack cocaine as she watched him taking it. Previously the singer had only tried cannabis. [...]

Fielder-Civil took the blame for Winehouse’s current state, as he spoke of how the singer didn’t even recognise him after her collapse, and began to cut her arms after seeing him self-harm.

‘Amy got really upset about seeing me bleeding. And because she’s loyal and f****d up over our love — like Romeo and Juliet — she cut her arms too.’

The 26-year-old began taking heroin at the age of 22. Admitting that he was old enough to know better, he said: ‘Crack is the nastiest drug. It makes you paranoid, unreasonable, edgy and totally suspicious of everyone.

‘I made the biggest mistake of my life by taking heroin in front of her,’ he said. ‘I introduced her to heroin, crack cocaine and self-harming. I feel more than guilty.’

He revealed how he was so consumed with remorse, that he has even considered taking his own life. ‘I feel like killing myself. I feel like f***** dying.’

Fielder-Civil, who has recently been released from Pentonville Prison after serving five months for GBH, spoke of his lowest point, when Winehouse nearly died in front of him last year.

He told how they had taken heroin and crack all day long. ‘We didn’t really think to stop. We both pushed things too much. And while I was getting out of my head, I wasn’t thinking that I was taking somebody with me.

‘Then my wife, who I love with all my heart and soul, just started shaking violently in front of me.’

He said that he started crying as he lay her down in the recovery position, clearing her airways to prevent her from choking or biting her tongue.

‘It was heartbreaking, seeing someone you love more than yourself, someone you would die for, someone you would kill for on the floor shaking.’

Worse still, the singer didn’t even recognise him when she came round. ‘I will go to my grave with that picture of Amy asking me, “Who are you? Who are you?”

‘I knew f***ing then that I had ruined something beautiful. It was all my fault. It was the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my life.’

Blake is still in rehab, and says that when he gets out there will be no reconciliation:

‘When I see pictures of Amy and the state she’s in it tears my heart out. I just want to pick her up and help her.

‘But I can’t — because I’m the man who caused it all. It scares me to death that I can’t fix Amy.

‘I will do anything for her — and that includes walking away.’

He has vehemently denied that he has been planning a divorce in order to get a share of the singer’s £10million fortune.

‘I’m not interested in her money,’ he said. ‘I always offered to do a pre-nuptial agreement before we got married.

‘It doesn’t matter if I turn up in the divorce court homeless and with no shoes on, I’m not taking a single penny off her.’

Fielder-Civil spoke of his dream that he and Amy could one day have a future together. ‘In an ideal world me and Amy would live together in a nice house with our two kids and all of this would be a distant f****** memory.’

‘What people don’t realise is that Amy is an amazing wife, an amazing home-maker and a beautiful figure in the home.

‘You would be surprised the domestic bliss you can have with Amy just doing the cooking and caring for you.

‘But because of drugs we can’t have a normal life together. That’s why I have to let her go.’

What Blake says about introducing Amy to hard drugs backs up what her sorry father told an interviewer back in February:

Amy Winehouse’s father Mitch has blamed his jailed son-in-law for his daughter’s addiction to class A drugs.

While Mitch concedes Blake Fielder-Civil is “not entirely responsible” for Amy’s drug problems, he believes they worsened after the two married last year.

Before getting together with Blake, Amy had told her dad she thought class A drugs were “for mugs”.

Well, while I’m tempted to be all cynical and heartless about this, I’m not so sure that he isn’t telling the truth here.  I mean, could it be possible that he actually has had a change of heart, that he truly is trying to get his life back together, that he really does want the best for Amy even if that means he walks away?  I want to believe it.  I really, really want to believe it.

But I also think that Blake takes a bit more than he deserves.  If someone has an addictive personality to start with, they will latch on to an addiction like a fish to a baited hook.  The desire to self-harm, to take drugs, has to be already present inside of someone…you don’t just cut yourself because your boyfriend thinks it’s a good idea, there’s got to be something already there inside you that urges you on.  While he does definitely need to take responsibility for his part in getting Amy messed up and hooked, he can’t take all the blame and leave Amy with none.  She also has to accept responsibility or she’ll never get better.

I’ve certainly ragged on Blake in the year or so I’ve been writing here, and he’s deserved it.  But if he really truly is trying to change his life and be a man, I’ll be the first one in his corner.  Only time will tell and it’s a bit early yet to make snap judgements.

Too bad it isn’t Amy Winehouse herself.

I took a few personal days last week, and it was at that point in which Blake Incarcerated-Druggie, current hubby of not-incarcerated druggie Amy Winehouse, decided that maybe crack is whack after all and took the system up on that whole “Go to rehab and we’ll let you out of the pokey early” offer they kept throwing at him:

The 26-year-old reportedly has to obey a curfew of 7pm after spending a year locked up for his part in a vicious assault on a pub landlord.

He was released from Edmonds Hill prison in Suffolk at 8am on Wednesday looking pale and with his arms covered in red scars.

The 26-year-old, who has fought a long battle with drug addiction, was not due to be set free until next month but was released after agreeing to attend Life Works rehab centre in the Surrey countryside.

Yesterday Fielder-Civil posed for photographers and said: ‘I’m doing really well, great to be out. Feeling happy.’

They kept begging him to go and he kept stubbornly staying there, so at least he’s realizing that rehab is at least less fail than jail.  And it’s much less fail than going to live with what passes for his mother figure…at least in rehab he has a decent shot.

So you’d think that Amy would be deliriously happy, throwing herself at her man, after months and months of barely-comprehensible shoutouts in concerts and continual reminders to the press that she and Blaaaaaaaake were tight?  Well, maybe not so much:

Winehouse herself was not there to meet her jailbird husband outside prison on Wednesday, leading to rumours of a rift between the pair.

The troubled singer is said to be livid that she did not know Black was leaving Edmunds Hill jail in East Anglia for a seven-week course in rehab that he allegedly expects her to fund.

She reportedly told friends that she is ’seriously considering’ ending her turbulent marriage, according to the Daily Mirror.

Winehouse, who left hospital on Monday after receiving ongoing treatment for a ‘chest infection’, looked far from jubilant as she emerged from the residence yesterday afternoon with make-up smeared across her face.

She appeared to be in an agitated state, lunging at a photographer stationed outside her home shouting: ‘Who’s first? Who wants some?’.

She refused to comment on her husband’s release.

You know, I’m taller and bigger than Amy (who isn’t?  My teenage daughter is taller and bigger than Mighty Mouth here), but I think I’d pass on any fight with her.  She looks like she’d cut you, leave you to bleed, and then spit in your wounds.  Now there’s an image to take with you today.

I don’t know.  One minute I’m pulling for this guy and the next minute I want to punch him in the face.  Probably much like Amy feels.  Only time will tell if he makes this whole rehab thing stick.  It is claimed in some circles that you basically replace one addiction with another so maybe he could become addicted to Rogaine.

As upset as I get at the family of Amy Winehouse for standing by (and occasionally bursting out in song) while Amy burns, I get just as upset at the family of hubby Blake Whatever-Whatever.  In the latest chapter of this sad, sordid saga, Blake’s own mother says that what her widdle boy needs is not rehab, but just to come back and live at home:

“I don’t think rehab is the answer,” Georgette Civil tells PEOPLE of her son, currently serving a jail sentence for assault and attempting to pervert the course of justice.

What is the answer? “Coming home to us,” Civil says.

Fielder-Civil, 26, has been in jail since November 2007, and media reports said his application for early release this Christmas has been denied.

“We don’t know when he will be released,” Civil says. “I can’t really say because I don’t want to jeopardize our efforts.”

So let me get this straight.  Blake has already been offered two deals which would have allowed him to walk out of jail early…one was to go straight to rehab and one was to go live at his mother’s house, both of which he turned down.  Let me repeat that for you, Mrs. Whatever-Whatever…he was offered a chance to come live with you as a condition of his early release and he turned it down.  What part of “I don’t want t’live wif mah mum” is a foreign language to you?  He has sent a message loud and clear…he would rather stay in jail than to go live with mummy.

And what is up with this “He doesn’t need rehab” crap?  Her son is a drug addict.  He has openly talked about doing drugs.  He has been photographed doing drugs in jail.  He has been busted with drugs in jail.  Kicking drugs is incredibly difficult…most people can’t do it with just willpower or the love of family.  Some homemade chicken soup and some nice footie jammies won’t do it.  Both Blake and Amy need intensive, serious help to end their drug habits once and for all.  It is hard, but it can be done.

On a side note, she also reveals that she doesn’t speak to Amy, and feels the singer is to blame for her pwecious baby not being released early:

She says, “I don’t speak to Amy. I focus all my efforts on my son and getting him out.

“I probably spoke with her one more time after court [Fielder-Civil's trial in June].

“I feel all the media attention on Amy has probably had an impact on my son’s release. That’s probably the hardest part of all. As a mother, what would any mother think when she sees Amy? It has had a huge impact.”

Once again, see my point above, where Blake himself turned down two chances to get out of jail early because they were not on his terms, and where Blake himself was busted in jail for violations of the rules.  It isn’t Amy’s fault that Blake is a drugged up chucklehead…he was like that before Amy came along.  Perhaps mumsy should look a bit closer to home when looking for people to blame in this whole screwed-up soap opera.

I used to wonder just what happened to make Amy and Blake the way they are…now, not so much.

I’d been hearing rumors that the Church of Scientology was inserting itself in the life of soul-singer and habitual drug addict Amy Winehouse. Seeing as how I know the “science” of Scientology is totally bogus after investigating them for months, I merely cringed at the thought and hoped it was mere tabloid rumor. But now, that rumor has reached a bit of a fevered-pitch and I can’t ignore the story any longer.

Anyone who follows Glosslip or celebrity gossip for that matter, knows that Amy Winehouse has had a disastrous year. Videos have leaked showing her smoking crack, and bragging about her other illegal drug activities, a habit of bailing out on performances, shocking and erratic behavior, her appearance is frightening, she pines for an incarcerated husband whom most of us would cross the street to avoid and her health is tragic. So, like in all instances, vultures see an opportunity to prey on a helpless victim and seize the moment. In this case, the “vultures” are alleged to be a pseudo-science based cult which pretends to be a religion to front its money-making scheme. From the OK! Magazine article quoting the Sunday Mirror:

The UK’s Sunday Mirror says that the singer told friends she was called by a member of the Church of Scientology’s celebrity center in L.A., offering to work with her to get her life together.

Founded by L. Ron Hubbard, a science fiction writer, Scientology has many famous devotees, including Tom Cruise, John Travolta, Kelly Preston and Juliette Lewis. The sect has a Narconon program which helps addicts conquer their dependency on drugs.

“She’s had a call from the celebrity branch of the Church Of Scientology, the Sunday Mirror quotes one of Amy’s friends as saying.

“She thinks they got her number through one of the American music producers who worked on her Back to Black album,” continues the source. “They told her they wanted to help her beat drugs and could tailor-make a program so she wouldn’t have to go to a residential center. She liked that idea because her husband Blake [Fielder-Civil] is out of prison soon and wouldn’t want to be away from him when he’s finally freed.”

Scientology fronts a drug-treatment program called Narconon. Narconon essentially employs elements of Scientology’s own brand of psychotherapy (we like to call it brainwashing, they call it auditing) as well as, a “detox” program (aka “purification rundown”) which uses high doses of vitamins (especially niacin, which has been proven to be lethal in high doses as the CoS program recommends) as well as extreme heat treatment, like saunas. They claim the result of this combination of techniques results in the individual purging their body of toxins by sweating them out. Investigation into Scientology’s claims have shown mixed or inconclusive results, with many people experiencing dangerous side-effects from the process. (Click here to listen to Glosslip Radio’s interview with Narconon expert Dr. Dave Touretsky of Carnegie Mellon.)

While I can understand Scientology seeing Amy as a person in desperate need of help from her grave state, the important thing to know about Scientology, is it gives NOTHING for free. So, even if their Narconon program worked for Amy Winehouse, like say famous member Kirstie Alley says it did for her drug addiction problem, Amy in the long run would be worse off.

Not only would Scientology expect complete loyalty from Amy for her “miraculous” cure, but they’d expect a large sum of her earnings, as well as future earnings. Amy would also be expected to shill for the CoS, and she’d have to bring in new members in order to maintain her status within the organization. Amy would also have to disconnect from family members who didn’t want to join Scientology, which in her case might include her toxic husband Blake and her enabling father Mitch….that might actually be good, but not for long.

As we’ve seen with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, being a high-profile member of the Church of Scientology, which has a rich and sordid history of abuse, death of members, extortion and a number of criminal elements, also has the potential to destroy an artist’s credibility, and ultimately their career.

Most of us following Amy’s rapid decline would love to see her turn her life around, but not at the risk of losing what’s left of her fragile psyche, or worse, her soul. Glossip has interviewed many well respected critics of the Church of Scientology, including many once high-level ex-Scientologists who have documented and detailed proof that the organization is a fraud for all it purports to represent. Narconon does NOT work, and Scientology is a scam.

Amy we beg you, find a proven program that works and will help you slowly, but carefully overcome your addictions and regain your health and vitality. If it sounds too good to be true, that’s because it is. Do NOT talk to anyone associated with anything related to the Church of Scientology, that’s help you can live without. Just ask Lisa McPherson.

Editor’s note: Just to be fair, here’s an unbiased article about the “purification rundown” used by Narconon.

Lately, the life of Amy Winehouse has been nothing more than a very slow trainwreck, and quite frankly if something drastic is not done and fast I do not believe she will last the year…if she does, I will be very surprised.  However, one seemingly constant good and stabilizing influence in her life has been her father Mitch, who was by her side when she actually checked herself into rehab to clean up for the Grammys (and previous rehabbing attempts).

At the beginning, he tried and tried to get her clean, making statements such as this:

Her father Mitch Winehouse has admitted that he is terrified that she will fall into her old habits and is concerned she’ll be ‘dead in three months’. [For the record, this was at the end of June, and it is now the end of September, three months ago.]

Amy collapsed at her North London home last week and was taken for tests at a London hospital by her 57-year-old father, who later said: ‘With smoking the crack cocaine and the cigarettes her lungs are all gunked up.’

‘The only thing that can go into her lungs are fresh air. She faces a stark choice - either she sticks to it or she won’t sing again.’

‘To think this could be my beautiful 24-year-old daughter’s life is preposterous. But if drugs mean more to her than breathing properly, then so be it.

‘But the doctors have told her if she goes back to smoking drugs it won’t just ruin her voice, it will kill her,’ he said.

And this:

“She understands she has to change. All she wants to do now is to sing,” he added. [...]

“I’m saying to those drug dealers, and they know who they are, if they are supplying crack to Amy, then they’ve got to take responsibility. I don’t want her hanging out with her mates like Pete Doherty either,” he said.

And this:

In an exclusive interview with the News of the World, he said: “I want her sectioned. The situation is getting out of control. I want her off the street.”

Dismissing another stint in rehab, Mitch said: “I don’t think being somewhere for six weeks is going to cure her problems.

“I think it needs far more radical measures. We will take the bull by the horns and deal with it.” [...]

Mitch, 57, revealed: “I’ve been on the phone to Amy’s manager in Los Angeles and he’s starting things rolling. They are going to be speaking to doctors, psychologists and everything else.

“I want Amy to be somewhere where she will be safe and where no harm can come to her.

“Obviously as her dad I will try and do what’s best for her.

“Unfortunately, what I think is best for Amy and what she thinks is best for her are two different things.

“And it might be that other parties might need to be involved.

“You need all four–the psychologists, the doctor, the local health authority and the next of kin–all to decide that somebody is sectionable.

“Now is the time to exert whatever pressure we have to try to do it.

“I’ve told them she is a danger to herself. There is evidence of self-harming and she’s a danger to other people because she’s attacked someone.”

And this:

Winehouse also says his daughter’s alcohol and drug abuse caused a seizure in August. Further attacks could be life-threatening. “She could die horribly. That is not going to happen–that cannot happen,” he says.

Oh, and one more…while he didn’t say all of this, it’s about him as well as Amy:

Her second overdose was in July – when she inhaled an “inhuman” amount of hash that left her vomiting uncontrollably and hallucinating.

At the time devoted dad Mitch, 54, said it was a “bad reaction to her medication”.

Medics are worried Amy’s brain was damaged by the cannabis overdose – she displayed symptoms normally associated with schizophrenia.

The pal yesterday said: “The future is bleak, bleak, bleak.

“Mitch does everything he can to protect his daughter - but his ‘explanation’ for Amy’s hospital dash in July was just simply untrue.

“She had smoked an inhuman amount of hash which resulted in acute cannabis poisoning. You have to take a s***load of pot to suffer that severe a reaction.

“It’s thought she had been smoking it for 36 hours.

“Amy’s fits were as bad as the convulsions she had during her overdose in August last year. No one has mentioned her meth use before – but that stuff is truly nasty.

“She is in need of years of psychiatry and medical treatment if she has a hope.”

Well, anyway.  I’m pretty sure you get the idea.  Mitch Winehouse has presented himself as a devoted yet sometimes misguided parent, who tries to do right by his drug-addled daughter but who can’t bring himself to quite follow through with the tough love that Amy so desperately needs.  Like a lot of parents with problem children, he seems to make an attempt at getting Amy help, but backs down off his tough stance when she shows either a teensy bit of good improvement or a lot of bad temper.  It may be that he believes the cure is worse than the disease, so when the going gets tough, Mitch gets going…out of town, leaving Amy to her own devices.  Nobody knows the specifics, but what I do know is what I see, and I see a bright, lovely, talented young woman throwing her life down the crapper for drugs, and I see nobody in her family doing the hard, tough work that it will take to get her well again.  If there are workings behind closed doors to get her help, they need to get moving, and fast.

Dawn just did a story on Amy and a horrific night she had, ruining her goddaughter’s singing debut by hugging her and moaning gibberish into the microphone (who in their right mind would let Amy be a godparent, let alone invite her to sing with the poor child?), trying to headbutt yet another poor soul who wanted a picture, crying that she can’t go on like this, and arriving home holding her hair on and missing a shoe.  Why do people still book her, other than so crowds can point and laugh as they would a circus freak, because it is painfully obvious that she doesn’t sing any longer, she just grunts and moans and mumbles her way through sets.  Friends of Amy are so alarmed by this latest terrible chapter that they’re not leaving Amy alone, afraid that she might (purposefully or accidentally) do something bad:

The troubled singer’s mates have cancelled commitments and set up camp at her home in Camden, North London, to stay with her round the clock.

One said: “No one wants to leave Amy on her own — she’s in a very fragile state at the moment.

“Her most loyal friends are terrified she is going to do something which she can’t overcome.

“She’s been to hell and back already but some fear she’s going to get worse before she gets better.”

Amy, who is waiting for husband BLAKE FIELDER-CIVIL to get out of prison, was due to face police questioning after allegedly serving a knuckle sandwich to dancer Sherene Flash last week.

Remember Blake Whatever-Whatever?  He turned down two, count ‘em two, get-out-of-jail-free cards in the space of about a week, all in favor of staying in jail longer so that he and Amy can be together when he finally is sprung.  It seems that this was a terrible blow to Amy, as her bad behavior has gotten worse in the past couple of weeks.  She acts like a woman who no longer cares about herself or what happens to her…with her connections and money, that is a bad thing.  Even Amy herself has said that her behavior is partly because she’s depressed and lonely because her husband is in jail (although her problems predate the jail term):

‘To be honest, my husband’s away, I’m bored, I’m young,’ Winehouse tells me.

‘I felt like there was nothing to live for. It’s just been a low ebb.’

So what does daddy Mitch Winehouse do while his daughter, who has emphysema, who is prone to brain seizures, who is addicted to drugs (including that horrible killer meth), who is facing yet more police investigations because of the punching incident the other night, who’s face is falling apart, who grows more and more skeletal every day, who admits to being depressed and angry, and whom he said would not live three more months three months ago?  Why, he did what any caring, loving, attentive, worried father would do in this situation…he took to the stage:

Meanwhile, her dad MITCH made his stage debut at the weekend, performing FRANK SINATRA classics in front of a 300-strong audience in Chiswick on Saturday night.

I was told the ex-cabbie got such a great reception that he went on to sing more classic hits for almost an hour.

You have GOT to be kidding me!  This is the last straw.  Mitch needs to get down off the stage (that he’s only on because of his daughter’s notoriety) and do something for Amy.  Nobody would give a tinker’s fart who he was if he wasn’t who he is.  All he seems to be good for any more is giving long-winded interviews where he tells the world much more than he ever should, gives a statement full of half-truths or out-and-out lies to the media whenever something bad happens, and generally letting Amy destroy herself.  Every time I turn around, I see this sack of hot air giving yet another interview on what is wrong with Amy and how it’s everyone else’s fault.  Why don’t you shut up, you big windbag…I was once one of your staunchest supporters, but not any more, not if you can sing while your daughter burns.

Is it any wonder?  I no longer am surprised that Amy is in the shape that she is in, or why she continues to stay that way.  If she dies young and tragically, she’ll be immortalized with the likes of Janis Joplin and Mama Cass, worth more dead than alive.  Do you see your daughter, Mitch?  She will be DEAD soon too, and when she dies you undoubtedly will point the finger of blame at everything and everyone, but you’ll refuse to take any blame for your own actions.  You’ll sit and moan and cry in interview after interview, while at the same time pocketing the money you get for them…not to mention anything Amy leaves behind.  Yeah, you’ll be set for life, pally.

Jamie Spears stepped in and took over his daughter’s life, got her in a hospital (against her will, she was totally incapable of making any sort of decision), made her STAY there (none of this wussy checking in and out every few hours), took over her finances, made sure she kept her appointments with the court, got her the medical help that she so desperately needed, and now look at her.  Brit’s career is back on track and while Brit isn’t out of the woods yet, she’s a lot closer than Amy is.  If Jamie Spears can do it, why can’t the family of Amy Winehouse?  Of course, at the moment I don’t think I’d want Mitch anywhere near Amy’s money, but there’s got to be somebody that could control it.  But who am I kidding?  Her friends have to babysit her while her own father is off on a stage somewhere making money off his daughter’s coattails.

Amy is not in her right mind and possibly has brain damage from the drugs.  Yes, Amy has to decide to help herself, but while I’ve been saying that all along I’m not sure Amy is Amy any more.  I think the drugs have taken over her brain and there’s no rational thought process there, and that goes double if she has brain damage.  There’s no way she can make any sort of informed decision concerning her own well-being, at least not right now.  Somebody needs to step up and save this girl from herself.  Would people stop loving her to death and do something?

On the bright side, with the practice Mitch is getting, he’ll be in fine voice to sing at Amy’s funeral.

I know it’s been a while (what like five days or something) since we mentioned the UK’s most infamous crackhead, but with these new photos emerging (via the two-snaps up DListed.com) you just can’t ignore what has to be a new turn for the worse in the embattled soul singer’s life.

Amy, who was slated to appear at the “End Of Summer Ball” in London last night appeared to be worse than ever. Winehouse, a unique-looking individual as it is, has become frighteningly thin, extremely disheveled and has taken on the appearance of a homeless person in the last year. Granted, we know she’s battling a debilitating drug addiction, major health issues and emotional stress due to her husband BLAAAKKKKKEEEE’s incarceration, but Jeebus Tapdancing McCains, what the hell?

Here’s more about Amy’s latest dramas from the Daily Mail:

Wearing scruffy animal print shorts, the troubled star looked shockingly skinny and ill as she performed at the End of Summer Ball in London’s Berkeley Square last night.With her gaunt physique, unkempt hair, smudged makeup and scratches on her legs the singer looked more unwell than ever.

The 25-year-old admitted she was on the verge of a breakdown after a night of worryingly shambolic behaviour — even by her standards.

The troubled star embarrassed herself by ruining her 12-year-old goddaughter’s debut singing performance and lashing out at a photographer before collapsing and sobbing: ‘Life can’t go on. I can’t do this any more.’

The singer was at the Berkeley Square Ball in Mayfair to provide backing vocals for her goddaughter Dionne Bromfield.

But onlookers were shocked at how out of it Amy was, and the audience at the charity bash cringed as she grabbed and hugged Dionne as she tried to perform.

The pair were joined on stage by a live band and one of Amy’s backing singers for the three-song set.

We’re told: ‘It was tragic — she seemed totally wasted. She was jumping all over Dionne as the poor girl tried to sing for the crowd. Amy didn’t really sing a single note — it sounded more like she was grunting down the mic.’

At the end of the performance, Amy’s backing singer told the crowd: ‘Isn’t she great? She’s only 12-years-old!’

But Amy crowed: ‘She’s better than you — it doesn’t matter how old she is.’
She then roamed from table to table, demanding to meet famous people.

Sugababe Heidi Range was sent to talk to her but couldn’t keep her attention long.

Our spy said: ‘Amy was then asked to pose for the event’s official photographer, but flipped and tried to headbutt him. She looked like a woman possessed.’

But backstage things took a turn for the worse. Our spy adds: ‘Amy collapsed backstage in tears. She kept saying, ‘Life can’t go on, I can’t do this’.’

It was a sorry return to the public eye for Amy, who has kept a low profile recently.

She arrived at her Camden home at the end of the night with only one shoe and looking horribly dishevelled.

I remember seeing pics of Britney Spears just before her father took over her estate and became her guardian, and I feel the same way now seeing Amy: death is imminent.

Both women possess a lot of charisma and talent, but were/are clearly incapable of taking on the adult responsibility needed to get their lives in order. Fortunately for Britney, her father didn’t wait until it was too late to save his daughter, and we can all say we were witnesses to Britney’s hard climb back to being among the living. Amy, on the other hand, is saddled with the worse kind of enablers, as well as what appears to be a stubborn streak a mile wide.

Amy’s father Mitch only too cheerfully releases statement after statement about his daughter “being fine” and suffering from “bad medication interactions” or accuses people of “slipping” Amy drugs, when in reality, we all know what’s going on. Amy is addicted to drugs and can’t on her own escape the vice-like grip they have over her fragile psyche. I don’t want to pass judgment on Amy’s parents, but for heaven’s sake, please do something now, because “too late” is right around the corner for this shell of human.

This is sad, even I can’t find anything snarky to say which means we should all beware of frost warnings in hell.