Palin Relaxing With Her Snuggie

Sarah Palin has written a book called Going Rogue.
It hits book stores today.
It’s being called a memoir of her life.

I’m sorry, a memoir? It’s not like she has this great history behind her life as a hockey Mom and ex Governor of Alaska. And certainly her political career has been beyond laughable.

So the question now is…
will Palin’s book end up on the bestseller list? Or go over like a fart in church?

Besides the obvious that will plague this book, (Palin’s lack of popularity) I read that her book was ghostwritten by Lynn Vincent. Talk about shooting yourself in the foot!
Why you ask? Whos’ Lynn Vincent?

Lovely Lynn is not only the ghostwriter of Sarah’s book, she is pretty cozy with well known, white supremacist, Robert Stacy McCain (no relation to McCain the maverick) and she co-wrote a book with him. 

Some snippettes The First Post about Lynn and Robert Stacy McCain,

She (Lynn) is also staunchly anti-gay, backing the controversial vote to re-criminalise gay marriage in California, and – this is where Palin and her publishers might have drawn the line, but didn’t – she is closely associated with a well-known white supremacist.

He is Robert Stacey NcCain, a former editor at the Washington Times, a paper he left two years ago after a steaming row with a colleague.

Another Vincent collaboration was with a retired general, William Boykin, former head of the US Army’s Special Forces Command. He described his career mission as to defeat Satan in order to save America as a Christian country. “We are hated because we are a nation of believers,” he said.

“Defeat Satan to save America as a Christian country”?
Yikes! What year is this again?

As mentioned previously, Lynn is also a credited author on Robert Stacy McCain’s book, “Donkey Cons: Sex, Crime, and Corruption in the Democratic Party”. Again, just lovely.

According to a comment left on Little Green Footballs

After resigning as governor in late July, Palin spent most of August in San Diego working with Vincent on the book, “Going Rogue: An American Life.” Rumors swirled about Palin sightings at Vincent’s condo complex in north San Diego County. Palin reportedly was joined here by her family and top aide, Meghan Stapleton. This month, Palin huddled with her editors in New York.

So out of all the ghostwriters that Palin had to choose from, she picked Lynne Vincent? As always, Palin shows her brilliance. And to think that she ran for VP. *shudders*

What did Mark Halperin of Time have to say about Going Rogue?

Based on discussions with various sources who have seen or been briefed on the book’s contents, here’s what you can expect from “Going Rogue”:

* just five chapters—but they are very, very long.

* some score settling with McCain aides she believes ill-served her (names will be named).

* a hearty bashing of the national media.

* an account of how her upbringing shaped her maverick sensibilities.

* a testimonial to the importance of faith in her life.

* a warm and personal tone, written in Palin’s own voice, despite the involvement of a collaborator.

Two things not in the book:

* Don’t look for hefty policy prescriptions.

* Once source who has seen  “Going Rogue” says it does not include an index.  That would give Palin a subtle revenge on the party’s Washington establishment, whose members tend to flip to the back pages and scan for their own names. If they want to know what Sarah Palin has to say about them, they will have to buy the book—and read the whole thing.

Let’s recap, shall we?
She picked a ghostwriter who is anti gay, who is a creationist, and who has has teamed up with white supremacist Robert Stacy McCain.
There’s nothing in the book on policy. (well no surprise, she can’t write what she doesn’t know)
There are FIVE chapters in her book with NO index.
She bashes the media big time, even though they are the ones who put her on the map.
She throws people she once worked with under the bus, and adds a touch of holy rolling goodness.

WOW! COUNT ME OUT.

Now according to Comcast News,

Palin doesn’t elaborate on her book compensation, describing the $1.25 million figure only as a “retainer” that appears to be a reference to her lucrative advance.

So $1.25 big ones for a ghostwritten ”memior”?
Again… wow!

I think once the right wingers are done buying Palin’s crappy book, (Elisabeth Hasselback probably camped out at Barnes and Nobles last night) this book may be headed right for the bargain bin.

Although it would make quite the dandy door stop! Gotcha!

Rosie O’Donnel recently chatted with shock jock Howard Stern on Sirius XM Radio.

She dished about her not so fabulous relationship with her wife lately, Oprah Winfrey and Oprah’s BFF Gail. And oh yeah… that she thought her and Angelina Jolie almost hooked up once.

Was this wishful thinking on Rosie’s part? Or wishful thinking on Jolie’s part? Or just creepy Howard Stern with his usual everyday thoughts? *snicker*

First, about Oprah….
Both Rosie and Howard say they think that Oprah and BFF Gail are closer than they are letting people know.

From EOnline:

As for her thoughts on Oprah’s relationship with her BFF, Rosie and Howard think there may be some sparks.

“I don’t know that she and Gayle are necessarily doing each other,” Rosie said, “but I think they are the emotional equivalent of…”

“A gay couple,” the radio man finished.

“When they did that road trip, that’s as gay as it gets, and I don’t mean it to be an insult either,” Rosie explained. “I’m just saying, listen, if you ask me, that’s the couple.”

Doesn’t Howard imagine ALL women that have a relationship with another women of any kind in bed together? I can’t stand the man and he skeeves me out to no end. I bet his palms are always sweaty. EWWWW!

As far as Rosie thinking that Oprah and Gail are a couple? 
I just think her bringing up Oprah and Gail was ridiculous and a real yawn fest.
Although Gail would have been a BIG improvement over Stedman! (I always considered him Mr Excitement)

Don’t get me wrong, I am not defending Oprah the Scientology cult sympathizer in any way. Even though everyone is eternally grateful to Oprah for having Cruise on her show, which led to the famous career end phrase “jumping the couch”.

Hey Tom! How’s That Scientology Going For You Lately?

So if you are keeping score, I find Howard Stern, Rosie AND Oprah all repulsive. Oh yeah Cruise too. All for different reasons. And none of those reasons have anything to do with sex.

So what about Oprah’s BFF Gail? I don’t think I have EVER thought of that women before in my life in any capacity what so ever. I find her as about exciting as a fence post. Although again, she still would have been a better pick than Stedman.
FYI…when Stedman and billionaire gal pal Oprah finally ended their 21 year old fling, he received $250 mil for his “years of ridicule and you better keep your mouth shut” severance package. Wonder what Oprah’s gal pal Gail will get? *snicker*

So where does Angelina Jolie come into this picture?

Well….
Rosie told Howard that she talked to Angelina on the phone a couple of times way back when.
Ohhhhhh! That’s where she got the idea that they were going to hook up. Who could blame her? WHAT?

Some more help from EOnline… Rosie said,

“She gave me her phone number,” Rosie said. “We talked on the phone two or three times, but that was that. There was a tentative plan to have dinner that never came through.”

Fear got the best of Rosie and she wasn’t able to seal the deal.

“I was a little afraid of her,” she said. “She’s scary in a sexual kind of way. I have dreams about her a lot still.”

Dinner plans too? WOW! Now wonder Rosie thought that there may have been a little somethin’- somethin’ going on between them.
Are you freakin’ kidding me?

First off, I have to mention, that I find Angelina Jolie ALSO repulsive, and again, it has nothing to do with who she did, who she almost did, or who she is doing now. Which of course is Brad Pitt, who I can’t stand either since he hooked up with “Angelina -Jimmy- Deana”. My nickname for her because of her huge plumped up sausage-like lips. You know…. Jimmy Dean sausage?

And secondly…. who gives a rats ass?
Really. Sounds like Rosie is doing a little “shock jocking” herself to get some attention.
And does anyone really want to hear about Rosie’s….  ahem….”wet dreams?”

I think many people think that there is no way in hell that Rosie could have scored with Jolie and that Jolie is way out of Rosie’s league. You know because everyone thinks Jolie is Ms. Wonderful and her beauty is simply breath taking? *ROLLS EYES*

But remember when Jolie kissed her brother on the lips on camera way back when? That was WAY too long of a kiss for any one’s comfort. How about her fling with Billy Bob Thorton? (ick)
I really wouldn’t have been surprised one iota if she did actually hook up with Rosie back then. Nor would I have cared. Hell, I wouldn’t care now!

But of course times have really changed now for Jolie. She thinks that when she poops it should be bottled as perfume. And I would imagine that Jolie would think that Rosie is not worthy of having scary sex time with her now. Besides, Jolie is saving it all for BRADLEY. *puke*

I think it’s moronic that Rosie thought that a few phone calls and a dinner date than never happened was some sort of prelude to jumping in the sack with Jolie or anyone for that matter.

So a word of caution people……
If you are not into Rosie that way…. I wouldn’t talk to her on the phone. And whatever you do, don’t make any dinner plans with her. Because it will obviously be perceived as steamy foreplay and undoubtedly an invitation for sexy time.

Unless of course, you want to hit that…..

Where’s The Camel Toe Police When You Need Them?

It’s hump day and what’s been going on in the world of celebrity gossip lately?
Same old crap and some new crap.

Lindsey Lohan went to court and partied the night before and the night after her court hearing. Yawn!
But wait… she said she’s afraid her Dad may kidnap her now. Uh.. again yawn. Wake me up when she does something new.

What’s also up?
Not Balloon Boy!  That news is SO rampant, that I am already tired of it. But it looks like reality has caught up with the Heenes. Honestly, I caught these loons on Wife Swap a while back and the father was a hot headed, delusional wacko, who thinks the sun rises and sets by him. I thought this man was questionable way back then, but you can’t always tell, with the way “reality” shows edit their shows. But now we know for sure. Yep! My gut instinct was totally spot on.

Now I think his wife is either abused and doesn’t know enough to get away and agrees with everything her idiot husband does regardless, or she actually agrees with everything her hubby does and also thinks you should raise your children by dragging them to twister romps and pulling them out of school and allowing them to trash talk to whomever they want. Either scenario is SAD. 
Oh! Have you seen their video on YouTube? I can’t understand what the hell they are singing about, but it looks pretty darn questionable. Future Beastie Boys ya think?

I wonder if wifey-poo will throw hubby under the bus, when it comes down to their day in court? Get out the popcorn! And as far as reality fame goes? Heenes… you got it now! Yah happy?

And more people who get under my skin…
Elisabeth Hasselbeck is back on The View. (oh joy) 
I guess little Ms. Perfect sent out some not so perfect baby pictures of her baby AND a guest appearance of her nipple to her friends and family by mistake. HA HA HA! This story brought me so much joy.

On to other idiots…
Rod Blagojevich (again NOT a celebrity), WILL appear on Celebrity Apprentice, yet another reason not to watch Trump’s show ever again.

And even more idiots…
Stephanie Pratt was busted for DUI. I wonder what bible thumper sista -in-law Heidi Montag will have to say about this? Maybe Heidi can get Stephen Baldwin to baptize Stephanie for her. ‘Cause we all know just how beneficial it was for Heidi. Praise Jesus!

And on to the King  and Queen of idiots…
Jon Gosselin is still hated by the majority of America. Well wait a minute…I stand corrected. Octomom, Nadya Suleman told Radar Online she thought Jon Gosselin was hot and has a crush on him. Ummm… hot?Perhaps Nadya needs her eyes checked and should pick up a paper every once in a while. Oh that’s right, she has 14 children, who has time?

But sorry Octomon, Jon was too busy getting his sexy on in a fancy cab with gal pal Hailey Glassman.
Hey Jon, you sure you want to pass this up? Could be a new show fer yah!
How about “John +Nadya +14+ 8 = The Earth Spinning Off It’s Axis”?

Well not if TLC has anything to say about it! They are already suing Jon for breech of contract, of course.
And he also has been ordered to pay back $180,00.00 back to his account with Kate. Kate ALSO has been ordered to pay some money back too. Seems like Karma has been rearing it’s ugly head with those two.

And speaking of Octomom, the Doc that implanted the SIX embryos (one split into two) into Octomom has been booted from the practice where he was employed for not following the rules. But of course he is still allowed to practice. Who knows what he will do now that he is on his own. I smell another reality show?
I can hear the promo now…
“Meet Dr. Eggo! He’s serving them sunny side up, so you too can have your very own reality show and start exploiting your very own litter of children in no time! Hey! Let Go Of My Eggo!”

Seriously, have you seen the latest clip of Octomon and her brood with all those kids crying? It makes me want to pull my hair out.

Speaking of child exploitation, Kate Gosselin tells Vanity Fair she ”feels like a prisoner” of her own fame and that the kids are starting to act out. STARTING to act out? Wow, if seeing Maddy in previous shows was only the start of her bitchdom, I woudn’t want to see her now. That child is not a force to be reckoned with! And please Kate…  let me get out the violin….you were being interviewed by VANITY FAIR and getting paid for it. Prisoner my ass!

On to more phony things….
Miss California, Carrie Prejean is being sued for her her boobs! K2 Productions (which directs the California USA pageant ) is asking Carrie for $5,200 back. I guess they paid for her boob job. K2 says it’s not about the money, and the money will go to charity. I doubt if will want the implants back. *snicker*

Speaking of cash….
Nicholas Cage is in a heap of debt. Cage is suing his former manager Samuel Levin for $20 million. Levin allegedly screwed with Cage’s money and Cage says that his manager is the one responsible for his current debt headache. Word of advice Nick…. don’t wait seven years before you check up on hired help that handles all your dough.

And on to big sloppy messes…
Anna Nicole Smith is back in the news again. Well, the court case of her doctors and Howard Stern that is.
In court, Larry Birkhead told a scathing account of Anna’s drug use while she was pregnant. 

Maurice Brighthaupt, former bodyguard of Anna, claims he saw Howard Stern, and Dr. Eroshevich injecting Anna with needles. He also said he saw Anna injecting herself. Why did this guy wait so long with this information? Supposedly Dr. Eroshevich was the bodyguard’s friend, as well as Stern. Sorry! No excuse.

Supposedly Anna Nicole was drinking pedialyte out of a baby bottle and laying in her own feces when found. Why was she ever brought to Florida in this condition? Now I know Anna was a complete mess with drugs, but when someone is that addicted to drugs and that incapacitated, she should have received help from the people around her, especially her doctors and those closest to her. Not checking into a Florida hotel. Stern was not present at her death, he was busy seeing a man about boat.

The IRS is also in play with Anna Nicole these days, and have filed a $125,112.86 tax lien on the estate of Vickie Lynn Marshall. So much for resting in Peace. Geez, what a mess.

And some weirdness in the news…
Marge Simpson is on the cover of Playboy’s October issue. Sorry, I didn’t find it at all amusing and I refuse to show a picture of it.
In fact I poo poo Playboy for advertising the Simpsons.

Nancy Cartwright, the voice of Bart Simpson, Scientologist extraordinaire, donated TEN MILLLION DOLLARS to Scientology in May of 2008. Anyone that supports the Simpsons in any way is inadvertently giving money to Scientology down the line. Why would Cartwright give the money to her children, when she would rather hand it over to Scientology? Gotta keep everything KSW! (Keep Scientology Working) Right Nancy? Hope she wakes up some day.

Speaking of naughty pictures.
Levi Johnston (former husband of Bristol Palin) will be posing for Playgirl and has been in the gym bulking up for his upcoming saucy shots. I also caught him on a commercial for Wonderful Pistachio nuts. Yes, the man who will soon be showing his nuts was hawking nuts on TV. The commercial shows him with an immense bodyguard and Levi is eating a few nuts and the tag line says “Now Levi Johnston does it with protection”
I kid you not. See the commercial for yourself!
Wow! Talking about pissing Palin off! Yeehaw!

But wait it gets better….
Levi was interviewed by Vanity Fair. The name of the article is “Me and Mrs. Palin”.

Levi dishes about Palin and her lack of parenting, her bad moods, Todd flipping out and Levi was quoted as saying,

“I thought, Was this woman—who, at home, would literally say things that did not make sense—really running for vice president?”

You go Levi! I have a new respect for the boy. *snicker*

Then we move on to more puzzling things…
The court case of John Travolta.
Readers are probably wondering why I haven’t reported on this case as of yet. The testimonies in the court case were changing on a such a daily basis with so much “he said/she said” garbage going on, and with changing stories, that if I wrote about what was happening as it happened, I would have had to edit the story every single day.

I will be covering this story when and if I feel that some sort of conclusion of sorts has been made. I will say that this case has been one big puzzle of unanswered questions on BOTH sides.

And speaking of The Travoltas moving on …
Both Kelly and John attended the IAS (International Association of Scientologists)
Scientology 25th Anniversary at Scientology’s St. Hill Org in England.
Sadly, it looks like John will not be leaving this cult any time soon.

Tom Cruise, Katie and Suri were also in attendance. Poor Katie and Suri.

Scientology wanted people to believe that 4,000 people were in attendance at their event. ROTFL!
That number is just classic Scientology spin in which they are so famous for. They usually have to fly and bus tons of people in, as well as dressing up their Sea Orgers members to fill in the seats so it will look full. Reason for this? So their IAS PR photo will look like they are still successful to their members. It’s an old smoke and mirrors trick of Scientology, so they can continue to deceive their members. Lovely, isn’t it?

The IAS is nothing more than members donating money to Scientology. (which the majority goes straight to cult leader David Miscavige) In return for their donation, they get a discount on courses, auditing and such. Which is not a discount at all since they are donating money. Duh!

Cruise and Travoilta have donated millions and millions of dolllars to Scientology. Exactly what Scientology does with all that money as fas as “helping” to “clear the planet”  is a mystery. The money goes to buy more buildings that stand idle, make Miscavige richer and pay for all their pending court cases, lawyers and Sci goons. Oh! and I almost forgot, they have to pay their Sea Org slave labor members about .25 cents an hour.

US Magazine reported on the 25th Anniversary and quoted Cruise about the Scientology protestors outside the event:

Later, during a reception, Cruise was overheard chatting with another American man about the protesters outside the venue. “They’re squirrels,” Cruise said angrily, according to a witness. “Stuck in an electronic incident. It makes me so angry!”

“Protesters are squirrels stuck in an electronic incident?”
Oh Tom, you certainly are one brainwashed mofo.
A ”squirrel” in scio-speak, means someone that messes or changes the tech of dead cult founder L. Ron Hubbard. Aka “squirreling the tech”. And “stuck in an electronic incident” is more scio babble from Hubbard’s work.

I wonder if Cruise actually said this though? Personally, I think if anything he would of called the protesters SP’s (suppressive people) not squirrels. And I think the “stuck in an electronic incident” line may have been borrowed from a video of another wacky Scientologist named George, which we reported on recently. Many duplicate videos of Scientologist George (who is an OTVIII, the highest that you can get on Scientology’s Bridge) showed up on YouTube and showed just how brainwashed Scientologists become the longer they stay in. The video is totally unscripted and SAD.

Cruise is supposedly an OTVII on The Bridge To Nowhere.

One more level to go Tom until you reach the tippety top to the Bridge of Total Freedom!
Yippee!
Good luck with that Tom! Wait till you see what OTVIII is all about!
SO worth the millions and millions of dollars that you blew. *snicker*

And now for something completely different and funny….
I was watching TV the other night, and there was a brief teaser for Season 6 of the steamy Nip /Tuck show, which started on Oct 14th. I thought I was seeing things, when I saw Mario Lopez completely decked out in black lingerie complete with a garter belt and black stockings. But no, I looked it up and yep it was none other than A. C. Slater (his name on Saved By The Bell) in drag!

Mario played Dr. Mike Hamoui on the series and he was seen in a steamy shower scene in a previous episode. Damn! I am going to have to start watching that show! Kudos for Mario for having the balls of steel for donning the less than flattering get up.

And even though Mario is one huge piece of eye candy…
sorry, this outfit just doesn’t cut it for me Mario. *snicker*

Wake Up Courtney! Time To Go To Court!

Courtney Love.
Just the name conjures up the feeling of Ewww.

Courtney has her knickers in a bunch (when are they not in a bunch?) over the way Activision used ex hubby Kurt Cobain’s image in Guitar Hero 5.

The agreement was to supposedly have Cobain sing only two songs in the game, which of couse incuded “Smells Like Teen Spirit“.  But Cobain’s character in the game is an unlockable character.

Cobain Ala Activision

For all you non gamers out there, an unlockable character means the gamer can make the image do other things. Like sing other performer’s songs.

So Love and former Nirvana band mates, David Grohl and Krist Novoselic, were not too tickled when they found out that Cobain is singing songs by Jon Bon Jovi and Bush in the game. (the band Bush that is, not Dubya, although that would be a riot)

Ex Nirvana band members were quoted about their dismay:

“While we were aware of Kurt’s image being used with two Nirvana songs, we didn’t know players have the ability to unlock the character,” they said.
“This feature allows the character to be used with any kind of song the layer wants. We urge Activision to do the right thing in ‘re-locking’ Kurt’s character so that this won’t continue in the future.”

Courtney called the avatar “vile” and “necrophilic” and Twittered:

” This Guitar Hero shit is breach of contract. I think Kurt would despise this game alone let alone this avatar.. We are going to sue the shit out of Activison”

When it comes to vile and necrophilic. Ms Love takes the cake.
We all know how vile she can be. And someone would have to be into necrophilia to be attracted to her these days.

As of late, Love has been looking mighty bad. The recent photo below, shows her beyond scrawny and way up there on the “Ewwww” scale.

Love Looking Like Death Warmed Over

 
I think it’s pretty cool that Activision agreed to include Cobain in their game at all. Love and ex band members should be thankful that Activision is keeping his memory and Nirvana’s music alive.

The ex band members are asking Activision to come up with a patch, so Cobain’s character stays locked. Fair enough, but a computer geek friend told me it can’t be done once the game is out. Don’t know if this is totally correct.

Love has her lawyer, Keith A. Finch on the case and he seems to think she indeed has a case.

Finch said,
“Activision was not given an unbridled right to use Kurt Cobain’s name and likeness. As for Cobain, his journals suggest that he’d be less than pleased about a game that shows him belting out “You Give Love A Bad Name”.
Writing about Bon Jovi in the late 1980’s, he issued a one word review: Evil.”

Well, I am not a fan of Bon Jovi myself, but I think the word evil to describe them is a bit silly and over the top. I am sure if Cobain was still alive today, I think his opinion would have matured a bit.

Besides, Nirvana was nothing to write home about. Nirvana themselves weren’t some ultra fabulous band. They were nothing more than a 90’s garage grunge band that literally “stepped in it”. And don’t even get me started on Love’s band “Hole”.

But hey, that’s my taste. Obviously if Nirvana sold over twenty-five million albums in the US, and over fifty million worldwide, they were very much admired.

But why some people continue to think that Cobain was some sort of iconic rock God is beyond me. He was a junkie who had a very short career, a raspy nothing voice and he had an average band. He met Love in 1990, they got married in 1992, and Cobain shot himself in 1994. (supposed self inflicted gun shot wound)
Many people blame Love for Cobain’s untimely demise. I guess we will never actually know the truth.

If you are driving around Aberdeen, Washington, you will see a sign which reads, “Welcome To Aberdeen Come As You Are”, which was purchased by the Kurt Cobain Memorial Committee back in 2004 as a tribute to Cobain. If you are not famaliar with Nirvana’s music… “Come As You Are” is of course one of their songs.

Let’s also not forget that Love and Cobain had a daughter, Francis Bean. I am sure her life has been far from enchanted due to her father’s death and her whacked out mother. 

So back to the lawsuit…
Ms. Love is not a stranger to lawsuits by any means. That is, people suing HER of course.

She was recently sued this past May by American Express for not paying $350,000 in charges. (gee I thought my card was bad)

Contactmusic.com wrote:

COURTNEY LOVE is facing a legal battle with American Express over the credit card company’s claims she has racked up more than $350,000 (£233,000) in unpaid charges.
The firm filed suit against Love in the U.S. District Court on Wednesday (27May09), demanding the rocker pay off the staggering debt on her Gold card.

The former Hole frontwoman had her plastic privileges suspended after she “failed and refused” to clear the balance, according to the lawsuit.
Love has been continuously struggling with her finances in recent years – it emerged in April (09) she had hired a team of private investigators to reclaim the millions of dollars she alleged were stolen from her late husband Kurt Cobain’s estate.
And just last year (08), Love was sued for $1 million (£667,000) by London & Co., an accounting firm which charged the star had failed to pay them profits from the sale of Cobain’s share of the Nirvana publishing catalogue.
A spokesperson for Love was unavailable for comment as WENN went to press.

 
Well, isn’t that interesting? She has two huge companies suing her.
Doesn’t stop there…
She also is being sued by her former body guard for $60,000.

TMZ wrote:

It costs a lot of money to keep the world safe from Courtney Love – her former bodyguards say she stiffed them out of $60,000 this year.

Screen International Security Services filed a lawsuit today in L.A. County Superior Court, claiming they provided “security services, in connection with the protection of Love, her family members, and her property” between April and August of this year.

SISS says Love never paid a penny for services rendered — totaling $58,222.50 — and are suing for the full amount plus interest.

Love’s attorney just sent us the following statement:

“This lawsuit should be placed in the Wikipedia page next to chutzpah. It has no merit and is based on a private security company’s attempt to fleece a celebrity.

SISS is claiming it is owed money for providing around the clock security for Ms. Cobain and her daughter at the St. Ives home for a period of time she and her daughter were NOT living at that home but were living at the Chateau Marmont. SISS has no written agreement with Ms Cobain to support their claim and on its face it is ludicrous.”

SISS was paid a substantial sum for the “service” it provided while they were living at that home. Despite knowing that Ms. Cobain and her daughter had moved out of the home they continued to provide security to an empty home by having someone sit in a car all day eating a ham sandwich while the Cobains were residing miles away!!!

AND her snarkiness doesn’t end there.
In 2007, Love was also quoted as saying,

 “I’m going to have a Christie’s auction,” to hock the bulk of Cobain’s belongings with a portion going to charity.”

I don’t know if this auction ever took place, I couldn’t find anything else about it.”

So do you think Love is really upset over this whole Guitar Hero thang? Or is she looking for some quick cash in all the wrong places? (see what I did there?)

Her lawsuit with Activision is starting to “smell like ”GLEAN” spirit to me”. *snicker*

Seems to me, that she has been living off Kurt’s fame and money for years, and doesn’t plan on stopping.
The lyrics from her song, “Celebrity” say it all.
“Use Once and Destroy“.

Now don’t get me wrong. I am all for performers getting credit where credit is due. And if there is a huge copyright issue, then it should be dealt with.

I think Cobain being included in Guitar Hero 5 was a compliment and an honor to both Cobain and the remaining members of Nirvana. And now Cobain will be forever immortalized in the gaming world. If gamers want to be more respectful, I guess they can always choose for Cobain to only sing the two songs by Nirvana. Easy solution. Those who don’t care, will have him wailing Bon Jovi.

As far as Courtney Love?  
What about your daughter Francis Bean Courtney? 
Doesn’t she deserve better?
Clean up your act and grow up woman.
And for God’s sakes, wash your hands and clean those damn fingernails!

Love’s Fingernails Looks Like She Clawed Her Way Out Of A “Hole”

Looks like Spencer and Heidi have put a hold on their honeymoonin’.

Spencer Pratt aka Speidi (hate conjoined names with a passion) was interviewed by Pop Wrap of the NY  Post, and happened to mention that he hasn’t been gettin’ any from his wifey-poo because he is a fraid of her becoming pregnant. He is preventing Heidi’s dream of becoming a mother by refusing her sex. Oh Spencer, you are a side splitter!

He says that Heidi has him ”debating whether to cut off his nuts”. Considering there isn’t much to cut off in the first place Spence, I am sure there are many people standing in line who would be willing to do that for you.

Apparently, Spencer is mortified of Heidi going off birth control and not telling him about it. Hmmm, what’s that Heidi? Birth control? What would Jesus have to say about that?

Spencer also says that sex really isn’t a fact in their marriage. Wow, at their age, (or any age for that matter) I find that pretty sad and funny at the same time. Maybe they just totally bore each other to death in bed. Or perhaps they may be distracted by a mirror in the room and can’t stop looking at their reflections.

I guess Spencer and Heidi haven’t considered ALL the other alternatives they can do to get their groove on without doing the dastardly missionary position nasty. Perhaps you two should rent a couple of videos or buy a book or two?

But on the other hand.. maybe it’s a good thing that they are not reproducing. Speidi offspring is a frightening notion. After all, what will they do when their baby gets more attention then them? Oh the inhumanity!

At any rate, for the life of me, I don’t see how discussing their sex life, or should I say the lack of their sex life is very complimentary to their already failing careers. It makes Spence look like more of a wuss, and the admittance of Heidi’s birth control use, makes them look like the phony Christians they truly are.

People wrote:

There are many things most people would rather not dwell upon when considering the facts behind the marriage between Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, perhaps the most reviled pairing in reality TV.

Thank God sex isn’t really a fact in their marriage, according to Pratt.

Speaking to the New York Post”’s PopWrap on Tuesday, Pratt, 26, says that he’s tried to prevent Montag, 23, from realizing her dreams of becoming a young mother – by refusing her sex.

“I’m not even kidding, my wife – OK, I’m gonna get crass here – but we’re barely having sex because I’m scared that she’s gonna have a baby,” he says. “That’s the level our marriage is on right now. I’m not even kidding – my wife has me debating cutting off my nuts.”
Hidden Fear
Behind his abstinence is his fear that Montag might go off her birth control without telling him, he says.

“She’s not the kind of person who would lie – she would just walk away and not answer the question,” he says. “So yes, I’m very concerned. Our sex life has dramatically changed recently.”

Pratt, who hints that he’d like to go on a double-date with President Barack and Michelle Obama to “share the spotlight,” and bashes frequent Speidi mocker Joel McHale, host of The Soup, as “a struggling wannabe actor just clowning on reality stars,” also gets in a dig at Lauren Conrad – whom he claims quit the MTV reality show only as a ruse to get more money.

“She quit The Hills because Speidi was getting more famous than her. So she quit thinking the show would end, but she was wrong. Her ego ruined her life and her career,” he says. “I pray for her every day and we’d all love for her to come back to The Hills when she realizes her move didn’t work.”

Pratt says he wants to go on a double date with Obama? *laughs holding sides*

Gee, what would that conversation be like over dinner? Would love to be a fly on the wall during that outing.
Maybe the double date would go something like this….

Obama: “So Spencer, why are you famous again? And why did I agree to this double date?” (as Michelle ducks into the bathroom for the 3rd time since they sat down to dinner, to avoid talking to Heidi.

Spencer answers Obama: “Uh… excuse me? I was on I Am A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here dude!”

Heidi corrects Spencer and says, “WE were on the show“.

Obama says, “is that the show that you two left early and Heidi was crying all the time?”

Heidi interupts and starts to cry and whine… ”Yeah but… they were SO unfair! And there was icky bugs and stuff. And I was the only awesome person on the whole show! And if it wasn’t for Jesus, I would have left even earlier than holding out for those four torturing days. Thank God Baldwn baptized me on show”

Spencer chimes in “ahem! WE we the most awesome people on that show. We totally ruled dude.”

Spencer then asks Obama, “Well then, how about The Hills? Have you seen how awesome we were on The Hills?”

Obama, annoyed, realizing what losers they are….looks at his watch and says, “NO“.
 
Michelle comes back to the table and Obama gives the hint to Michelle for them to leave by shifting his eyes back and forth towards the door.

Spencer  says,  “you never heard of the Hills? Dude! that’s like SO impossible.”

Obama stands up and says, “well we really should be going, I have an important meeting tomorrow”

Spencer says, “ok cool man, you must be really busy with all the President dude stuff and all. Maybe we can do this again some time”The Obamas pretend not to hear Spencer as they hurry out the door.

Spencer proudly sits back and says ”Man, they totally loved us.”

And Heidi says, “Totally”

Spencer grabs Heidi’s leg, winks and says, “come on…. let’s get out of here and do some serious dry humping. Which I am totally rad at.”

Heidi says “Totally“.
End scene.

*Sigh*
I digress…
So back to not having sex and their dwindling careers….

Spencer and Heidi can always live off Heidi’s line of whore bag clothes called Heidiwood. (if they are still selling that is) I find the name Heidiwood for her fashion line totally ironic now.

Maybe they should change the title to “Speidi-Blue-Balls” and feature bedazzled chastity belts. Awesome!

Word of advice Speidi… Save your money dudes. I think your future careers will involve Heidi eventually doing a commercial for tampons. And down the line you both may be asking if people want paper or plastic.

Or perhaps you two can do a Christian public service video on abstinence? I can just imagine what it would sound like…. 
Spencer would say, “Just don’t do it dudes, you end up with babies and junk”
And then Heidi would say, “Besides sex can be SO icky! Yuck!”

I say if you want some really big bucks there’s always the all mighty sex tape leak that you two can fall back on. A comedy sex video that is. *snicker*

Oh wait….that’s  right… you ain’t gettin’ any.

Speidi Off To Dry Hump Like….Ummm, Errr…Rabbits?

Every once in a while you read something that just makes you cringe and say, Oh come on!
This is one of those stories.

Apparently, Simon Cowell has written a letter, excuse me… a VERY LONNNNNNG letter to his younger self and it was published in the Daily Mail. I didn’t read all of it, because #1…. I have a life, and #2… it was just making me cringe so much I was getting a crick in my neck. And also one of my pet peeves is someone talking in the third person.

First off, who does this? 
Or if you are so silly to do so, do you have it published so everyone can say EWWWWW and think you are a total douche? Really, can Simon be any more full of himself?

Simon must have started at a very early age. The picture below is probably how Simon started out.

Simon Give Us Kiss Now.. You Handsome Dog!

He wrote this letter to himself because his 50th birthday is right around the corner on Oct 7th. I was speechless as I skimmed over the letter and just couldn’t believe what I was reading. We couldn’t post the whole letter here because it was beyond HUGE.

It’s best to read the entire letter yourself on the Daily Mail website.
The letter was entitled, “SIMON COWELL: A letter to my shallow, reckless, cocky younger self“.
I kid you not. Oh! Be sure to have a bucket handy. Click here and gag.

Eonline reported:

Simon Cowell’s Gone Soft (and Long-Winded) in His Old Age

Someone needs to pull the pen from Simon Cowell’s fingers.
While we love it when the crotchety American Idol judge decides to air his dirty laundry in public (that Susan Boyle botch list was a classic), is an absurdly lengthy diatribe really necessary?

On the cusp of his 50th birthday next week, Cowell wrote a letter to himself published in yesterday’s Daily Mail in the U.K. In it, he looks back on the past few decades, scolding himself for poor decisions he made in the ’80s and ’90s and patting himself on the back for the good ones.

It would be a good, self-deprecating, third-person about-face, but regardless of what he says, nearly 3,500 words makes for nothing but a puff (as in puff, the magic ego) piece.

“You are on a roll and you think the good times will last forever but, oh dear, Simon. You are so, so wrong,” he writes to the 1980s version of himself. “You look like a complete idiot…you are overconfident, far too cocky and dressed from head to toe in expensive designer gear…It hasn’t dawned on you yet, you idiot, that you can’t afford any of this stuff.”

Of course, Mr. Tight T-shirts takes it easy on himself for the final 1,000 words or so.

“I must say, despite everything, I’m quite proud of you, Simon,” he says. “You’re happy, you’re content and just incredibly grateful for where you are.”

Then he goes on to list what’s changed for him over the years—really important things like what he drinks and snacks on and how he doesn’t like to bum $5 from anyone. He pats himself on the back for never marrying because he’s such a workaholic, and for staying friends with his exes.

“Your job, Simon, was to make celebrities, not to become one yourself, dear boy,” he says. “Underneath it all, Simon, you are a realist. You don’t believe the hype about yourself. You can see what you do well and what you do badly. People think you are this Machiavellian character, forever plotting and scheming.”

He ends his diatribe as Hallmark would have intended—”So happy birthday! Love Simon”—although we’d hate to see the card size needed to print this self-loving loathing opus.

“Happy Birthday LOVE Simon“? I think I just threw up a little.

The definition for narcissism is as follows:

1. Excessive love or admiration of oneself.
2. Psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconscious deficits in self-esteem.
3. Erotic pleasure derived from contemplation or admiration of one’s own body or self, especially as a fixation on or a regression to an infantile stage of development.
4. The attribute of the human psyche characterized by admiration of oneself but within normal limits

Well I am not sure if #3 applies to Simon, but it would not surprise me one iota!

His letter did remind me of a little poem from my grammar school days when people used to sign your autograph book when you graduated. The all so familiar ”roses are red” rhymes and those little clever ditties like “2 great, 2B, 4 gotten”.

No it wasn’t the “roses are red, violets are black, go sit on a tack“ rhyme that came to mind. (although it certainly would apply)

It was the following little poem, which I would like to dedicate to Simon on his upcoming 50th birthday….

You love yourself you think your grand..
You go to the movies and hold your hand.
You slip your arm around your waist…
And when you get fresh.. you slap your face!

With new reports of Cowell doing American Idol for another two years and also producing “The X Factor” in the US, he will be making over 100 million by this time next year. *shakes head*

It is quite obvious that he can care less that this letter to himself makes him look like a total conceited, pompous ass. Or maybe that is exactly what he wanted. His popularity seems to stay afloat by people loving to hate him.

Oh crap, I think I just contributed to that!
Touche’ Cowell!

Pamela Anderson with Henrik Winther

Pamela Anderson has a bone to pick with Kentucky Fried Chicken. She is a member of PETA. Although she has been criticized in the past for being a bit of a hypocrite when it comes to PETA, as far as what she has worn and eaten, I have to say that  this fight against Kentucky Fried Chicken is justified in my opinion.

Now I am not a big fan of corporate food chains to begin with. The most I ever venture into is a Crackle Barrel or Burger King if I am on the highway and the choices of meal stops are very limited. I haven’t been in a Kentucky Fried Chicken since the late 1970’s, and after watching the KFC chicken processing video, I never will.

I had the misfortune of suffering through the entire video of Kentucky Fried Chicken’s processing plant which you can view at  www.kentuckyfriedcruelty.com and I was totally horrified to say the least. Workers throwing chickens against the walls, stomping on them alive, clipping their beaks off on arrival, over crowding, boiling them alive and the tale of terror goes on.

Pamela Anderson has contacted Kentucky Fried Chicken and has asked them to be more humane in their processing plants and and even asked Kentucky’s governor to remove a bust of Col. Sanders from the State Capitol Building. Pam went as far as to contact Henrik Winther, president of Rostik, KFC’s Russian partners and asked them to watch the slaughter house video.

Pam has appeared in billboard adds in her “lettuce bikini top” and TV spots asking people to boycott Kentucky Fried Chicken until they change their evil ways.

Pamela is not alone in her fight against KFC. Many celebrities as well as musicians have joined her fight. From Paul McCartney, Phil Collins, Tommy Lee (natch), and Pink, to the Smashing Pumpkins and Chrissie Hynde of the Pretenders. For the full list of  almost 60 celebs that support this boycott click here. And some of the celebs have provided short videos. These stars are asking people to “Kick the Bucket” and sign the petition.

Kentucky Fried Cruelty Activists explain their beef with KFC:

The roughly 1 billion chickens killed each year for KFC’s buckets are crammed by the tens of thousands into excrement-filled sheds that stink of ammonia fumes. The birds’ legs and wings often break because they’re bred to be too top-heavy and because workers carelessly shove them into transport crates and shackles.

Chickens’ throats are slit and the animals are dropped into tanks of scalding-hot water to remove their feathers, often while they are still conscious and able to feel pain.

KFC lets frustrated factory-farm and slaughterhouse workers handle live birds, so many of the animals end up being sadistically abused. At a KFC “Supplier of the Year” slaughterhouse in West Virginia, workers were documented tearing the heads off live birds, spitting tobacco into their eyes, spray-painting their faces, and violently stomping on them. This was discovered more than two years after KFC promised PETA that it was taking animal welfare seriously.

KFC hides behind its Animal Welfare Advisory Council, even though five members of the council have resigned in frustration. One of them, Adele Douglass, told the Chicago Tribune that KFC “never had any meetings. They never asked any advice, and then they touted to the press that they had this animal-welfare advisory committee. I felt like I was being used.”

And How KFC Can Clean Up Their Act:

PETA wants KFC to adopt the animal welfare programdeveloped by five members of its own animal welfare board. These advisors are the world’s top poultry experts; they advise the meat industry in North America and Europe and believe that KFC can—and should—adopt them. KFC has yet to do any of the following:

Adopt the “Animal Care Standards” program. This would lower the amount of ammonia in the air in factory farms, improve the living spaces and lighting in chicken sheds, prohibit the intentional starving of breeding birds, and ensure that birds are provided with mental and physical stimulation.

Switch to controlled-atmosphere killing (CAK). This would prevent live birds in slaughterhouses from being abused by workers, having their throats slit, or being scalded while they were still conscious. CAK would also improve conditions for workers and decrease contamination levels in chickens’ flesh.

Switch to mechanized chicken gathering. This would drastically reduce the number of broken bones and painful bruising that birds endure when factory-farm workers carelessly throw them into transport crates.

Breed for health rather than rapid growth, and stop feeding drugs to chickens. This would reduce the rate at which birds suffer painful, crippling diseases and injuries, such as broken legs, heart attacks, and lung failures.

Make all welfare standards transparent and verifiable. This would simply ensure that the animal welfare program is being adhered to through announced and unannounced independent audits (the results of which must be made available to the public through KFC’s Web site).
 

Seems like all reasonable requests to me. So if people have to pay a little more for their bucket of bird, then so be it. Besides, these places are only adding to the ever mounting and staggering problem of obesity in the US. Fast food chains play a huge part in the rising cost of health care due to all the health problems associated with being overweight.

Now I am not a fan of Pamela Anderson’s one iota. I can write an entire article on her that would rip her a new one as far as her and Tommy Lee’s shenanigans over the years, besides her overall phony fake parts appearance. And some will say she does all this for the publicity. Whatever. It’s still a good cause and KFC can certainly be less cruel. I know all slaughter houses are a nightmare, and I am certainly not dismissing all the other cruelties that go on in other places, but simple measures can be taken to make them less cruel. And I will admit that I am a bit of a hypocrite due to the fact that I am not a vegetarian myself, but I do try to limit my eating habits.

Many people think PETA goes way too far, but I agree with what they have asked of KFC, and I saw the horrific processing video. And since I HATE corporate fast food chains already… this campaign gets my vote. I am also in full agreement with PETA’s stance on any circus that uses elephants and big cats in their shows. Go to the Cirque baby! Animal free circuses all the way!

I digress….
So before you pull in to that next drive thru… stop and think of what you are supporting. If the chicken processing video you watched of your next lunch or dinner being prepped didn’t bother you, perhaps when you order that next KFC Chunky Chicken Pot Pie , Mmm mmm, that has 770 calories and 42 grams of fat,  and 2,160 mgs of sodium, will make you think twice.

For all the caloric, fat content and sodium levels of all KFC’s menu items, go here, and feel ill. Check out the stats on other fast food menu items too. I guarantee you won’t be making as many trips as you used to!

Kentucky Fried Cruelty Website Logo

The economy today has had an effect on retail sales across the board. Even celebrity fragrances have been hit with tough times.  Oh the inhumanity! *snicker*

Just two years ago, Forbes reported that according to Euromonitor International, (a Chicago-based market research firm) sales  totaled $353.6 million for the top seven celeb fragrances. Geez! No wonder why so many stars have their own scents.

This year however, overall sales are down 10%. Yep, the celebrity fragrance market is just not as hot as it used to be. Perhaps people just can’t afford it. Or maybe people are wising up to the fact that celebrity fragrances are just plain silly and embarrassing to wear? Could that be the culprit?

The celebrity fragrance market unlike other fragrances are way more fickle. If a celeb was caught in a scandal and their career turned lukewarm in the public eye, it can put a big damper on the popularity of the scent. Because that’s just how silly people are. Ridiculous but true.

So which celeb’s scents are currently top sellers?
Well, P Diddy, or Sean Puffy Combs, or Sean John, or Sean Combs, or just plain Diddy (wish he would make up his freakin’ mind) had a best seller with Unforgivable  that brought in brought a whopping $74.9 million in the past. And Britney’s scents are still selling VERY well and defying all odds even with the recent slump of other celebs fragrances. Maybe Diddy’s and Britney’s stuff just smells better?

The NY Daily News reported:

Fragrance peddler Parlux France relies heavily on its celebrity branded scents and has taken a hit for it. The company produces Queen Latifah’s Queen, Jessica Simpson’s  Fancy and Fancy Love, Andy Roddick’s Andy Roddick and all of Paris Hilton’s many fragrances (Paris Hilton, Paris Hilton for Men, Heir, Heiress, Just Me, Can Can, Fairy Dust and Siren).

The company lost $4.3 million last year and $2.5 in the second quarter of this year alone.
While the prestige fragrance market as a whole is down 10% from last year, Britney Spears is one celeb who appears to be bucking the odds.

Sales of her fragrances – Fantasy Britney Spears, Britney Spears Believe, Curious Britney Spears and Curious in Control Britney Spears – rose 13% in the June quarter. Elizabeth Arden, the company behind the ageing pop tart’s perfumes, just brought out Circus Fantasy, named after her latest tour and album. Then again, she’s global.

“More than half of the sales of Britney brands were sold of outside of North America,” said an Arden company spokesman.
Also doing well are classics like Chanel’s Coco, Mademoiselle and No. 5 and Dolce and Gabbana’s Light Blue. But it remains to be seen how Forever Mariah Carey, Derek Jeter Driven Black or Sara Jessica Parker’s Lovely will fare in recessionary times.

So even if the scent is sold globally and has a huge advantage over others, it still seems more important if the star selling the perfume is currently a hot commodity. Perhaps Paris Hilton’s perfumes have taken a nose dive due to her failing popularity. I think people are just sick to death of her. I know I am.

Mariah Carey’s ” Forever”is due to hit this September because she has a new album coming out. She also has a movie coming out this November. Anyone remember her movie *cough* Glitter?  Only time will tell how long ”Forever” will be around.

With over 100 fragrances coming out each year both from stars and regular companies, the market has become flooded. The competition has become fierce for celebs to have their scent be the next big hit. So many celebs in the music industry are scheduling their fragrances to coincide with their CD releases. This can be a risky move if the album totally bombs, because then the fragrance becomes a reminder of that failed album and then in turn becomes an embarrassment to wear to most.

Some celebs fragrances have stayed around for a while, like Sarah Jessica Parker’s Lovely and Covet .  Covet debuted two years ago when her Sex In The City Movie was released. Perhaps Sex in the City’s popularity has kept it’s ratings up? (the perfume that is)

I am sorry, I just think the whole celebrity fragrance thing is so cheesy. What’s next celebrity scented candles?

Especially for the fact that these fragrances’ popularity stem from whether or not the star is hot or not. If you find a fragrance you like and it was put out by a star that everyone now thinks is washed up or has failed in the popularity poles… would you stop wearing their fragrance even if you liked it? Would you be embarrassed to say,  “oh yes I still wear Clay Aiken’s Evening In The Stable” *snicker*
But this is exactly what happens.

I am not a big fan of perfume to begin with. I can’t tell you how many times someone has walked by me and I literally choked from whatever perfume that took a bath in before they stepped out their door. Some people slather it on so heavy, that their perfume arrives before they do and stays long after they’re gone. Thank God Poison is no longer popular. That stuff used to literally kill me. It was appropriately named.

One time I actually had to change my seat on an airplane due to the women sitting next to me. She must have dumped an entire bottle of Woah! Do I Stink! all over herself. I got an immediate headache, my throat was closing up, and I couldn’t even breath. I say wearing heavy perfume should be banned on airplanes. And that goes double for any of my gal OR guy pals who want to climb in my car. Whatever happened to the oh so silly move of spraying the room and then walking into it? *snicker*

Ok, enough of my drama on perfume.
Except I have to say that I would never buy something based on a star’s popularity and I have never bought a celebrity fragrance.
I have been wearing Alyssa Ashley Musk by Houbigant for ever. It’s less than $30.00 for a good sized bottle and I have received mega compliments on it over the years. It’s all I wear AND I am proud to wear it. I am just not caught up in the whole perfume mania. You will never hear me say “oh I am wearing The Beckhams Intimately Line” (you would actually have to pay ME to wear it)  Their promo picture alone is beyond pretentious.

Look How Sexy We Are!

Speaking of which, I wonder why Beckham’s  BFF Tom Cruise hasn’t come out with an entire line of Scientology cult scents yet? I am sure he would be able to talk Scientology cult members into buying Galactic Spice, or how about KSW Cologne (their acronym for Keeping Scientology Working), OT Orchard  for the gals or perhaps a line of body splashes like Body Thetan Splash. Oh I can go on forever, the possibilites are endless.

Of course Cruise would never use those particular names because….what is the first rule about Scientology? Don’t talk about Scientology.
So maybe he would have to kick it old school and name it something like Risky Business. After all, the name Risky Business does describe any company investing in any new movie projects with Cruise now. Oh snap!
But at the very least, we all know he would be the authority on fragrances. *tee hee*

Awesome! Got My First Order!

Aaaaanyways….
If you are going to buy celebrity fragrances in the first place, than you should buy it because you like it. Don’t be like all the other sheeple who buy what’s popular because the celebrity had another hit movie or a CD release. Because if this is the way you think, then that sixty clams you once plunked down for Jaylo’s Glow *snicker* has surely been wasted. Unless you want to lie about what your wearing. Yes some people are that ridiculous.

One fragrance that has stood the test of time is the hilarious Elizabeth Taylor’s White Diamonds (of course with the much older crowd)

Sorry Liz, no dis intended, but White Diamonds always reminds me of a friend of mine whose husband bought her White Diamonds for Christmas. She hated it, but didn’t want to hurt his feelings so she acted appreciative. She left the bottle in plain site unopened, hoping he would get the hint that she never used it. But the following Christmas she received yet another bottle. We laughed are asses off. Men!

Perfume’s popularity has gone through many changes over the years. Sure the old standards like Channel No. 5 are here to stay. But the classics are a breed all their own, and cost a lot more to boot. I think celebrity fragrances have their own little group.

bellasugar posted The Top Ten Fragrances that You Loved or (Hated) in Jr High School.
 Which was a blast from the past.
They listed Jean Nate, Charlie, The Body Shop Perfume Oil, Heaven, Electric Youth,The Entire Roster of Designer Imposters, Sunflowers, Exclamation, Ck One, and Love’s Baby Soft.

The most popular fragrance when I was in school, was Patchouli Oil. And yes I wore it for quite a while, and I stil like it, but I haven’t worn it since then. So I guess I am guilty of changing fragrances for the changing times. (I also don’t want my car searched if I am pulled over) *snicker*

I also remember using  “Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific” shampoo, which was so fragrant, it killed two birds with one stone. Sure wish I can find some of that stuff today just to smell it once again.

There were plenty of fragrances that used to be popular way back when. (including the guys stuff)
Some biggies were English Leather, Old Spice, Aqua Velva After Shave, Tabu, Tigress, Shalimar, L’Eur Du Temps, Windsong, O’ de London, Rive Gauche, and the infamous Evening in Paris, just to name a VERY few.

Whoops! Almost forgot Hai Karate After Shave!
Who can forget their commericals of girls going wild?

Today it has been replaced with the more updated AXE which uses the same girls gone wild idea for their AXE “you have been warned” commercials. YouTube has many parodies of their commercials, but one of my all time favorite fragrance parodies was for a pseudo cologne, called Douche Cologne. Click here and giggle. (it’s a tad racy in one part, so if you are easily offended, you may want to pass)

It’s any one’s guess which celebrity fragrance is going to be the next big seller and if it has any staying power in today’s economy and the fickleness of the market. With over 100 fragrances coming out each year world wide, the market has become flooded. The competition has become very fierce to have that next big hit.

I am surprised others in the music industry haven’t come out with their own fragrances. Doesn’t seem to be any rocker’s fragrances . The Stone’s Brown Sugar would be a no brainer, and I am sure with all the Beatles flap lately, if they were to come out with a fragrance it just may work. It would probably have hints of Apple *tee hee*

OR how about for the younger crowd? Perhaps Green Day Garden or Blink 182 Bouquet would sell? Probably not. The target audience is not the same. But you never know. Hey I want 10% if I see any of these on the market!

Even other celebs like Donald (ick) Trump and Simon (ick) Cowell jumped on the fragrance band wagon. I guess they needed the cash?
Wonder how Donald Trump’s stuff is selling? Maybe it’s selling better than his Trump Water?

Who would ever admit to wearing Trump or Cowell’s stuff anyways?
Or maybe your more of an Antonio Banderas fan? Look he even has his hand extended on the display, as if to say (in Antonios’s accent of course) “Come… come… take a whiff of sexy” *snicker*  

Speaking of celeb fragrances that people may be (or should be) embarrased to wear…
How about Britney Spears new Circus Fantasy?

Some how the name Circus Fantasy doesn’t sound appealing to me. I know it is a reference to Britney’s album and tour, but Circus Fantasy? Really? Has Elizabeth Arden lost their damn minds?

Even the packaging looks tacky. Looks like it comes with candy circus peanuts (the worst candy ever). And at $55.00 a pop, it should come with popcorn or a candy apple at the very least.

Sorry, but a perfume with the word circus in it, reminds me of  clowns and something that would smell like elephant poop stuck to a clown’s shoe and cotton candy all in one. Others may be reminded of a sexy trapeze artist, or perhaps a day at the circus with their family? Or dancing circus dogs in little hats and tutus? Ummm…. again, I just dont’ get it.

But hey, maybe she will be laughing all the way to the bank with this one. After all her fragrance Curious was a best seller in celebrity fragrance world.

For me, the word circus makes my mind go right back to the image of CLOWNS. Scary freakin’ clowns.
And clowns have always freaked me out! *shudder*

Rumors have been circulating lately about the gender or shall I say the genders of Lady GaGa. Many people thought that The Princess of Pop (yeessh) is a hermaphrodite. For those of you who do not know what a hermaphrodite is, it is a person born with both male and female genitalia.

The picture that had everyone a-buzz, is the one below. It clearly shows a “bulge” of some sort in the crotch region.

People were wondering, if this was carefully placed “package” for shock value for her career? Or a photo-shopped picture? Or is Lady (I use the term lightly) more than just a lady?

Well Lady finally came forward and put an end to the rumors and said that “she was not offended, but her beautiful vagina was very offended”.  Thank God that is cleared up, I will no longer have sleepless nights. *snicker*

Wait….what did she say? Her beautiful vagina? Who the hell talks publicly (or at all for that matter) about having a beautiful vagina? (with the exception of the Vagina Monologues)
Wow!  Talk about being totally full of themselves.

The Examiner.com reported:

Since the hermaphrodite rumors started circling around Lady Gaga back in August, the singer has kept quiet about whether or not she has both parts.

Lady Gaga reportedly told an Australian radio station, “My beautiful vagina is very offended. I’m not offended; my vagina is offended. I’m not embarrassed. I sold four million records in six months; I’m not embarrassed about anything. I think this is society’s reaction to a strong woman.”

“The idea that we equate strength with men and a penis is a symbol of male strength, you know, it is what it is. But like I said,” the dance-pop diva reiterated, “I am not offended at all, but my vagina might be a little bit upset,” she added.

The singer has been flaunting her naked body in various magazines since the rumors began, hoping to disprove that she may have both man and lady parts, but we all know what a little Photoshop can do.

What do you think? Is Lady Gaga telling the truth or just deny, deny, denying?

My reply? Who gives a damn? Sorry, I could care less what she’s packing, and besides, what’s the difference? Are people saying if GaGa was a hermaphrodite that they wouldn’t be fans any more? Why, can’t a hermaphrodite be a diva too?

This story oddly peaked my interest and I decided to look more into GaGa’s music, since I wasn’t too familiar with it, and I wanted to see what the fuss was all about. What I discovered wasn’t much. I found an ok looking gal who loves to dress in kooky outfits and writes some really lousy songs.

GaGa is going the ol’ shock diva route because she basically needs those costumes and stage performances to hide her lack of talent. Her audience needs a lot of distractions. And now that she has a following, he crappy songs wont’ matter as much.
 
Her voice and song style comes pretty close to Madonnas, although Madonna’s songs were better written. Now I am not a fan of Madonna’s either, but nobody can deny that when Madonna blew up big in the 80’s that she was at least original and her songs were much better than GaGa’s. 

I have to say, that some of GaGa’s outfits are very cool, I will at least give her that. I love the way she sometimes meshes a vintage look with wackiness and forms some pretty outrageous get-ups. BUT…is that it? Yes, that’s it.

Let’s not forget this has been done a hundred times over in the music biz, and way before she strapped on that bubble suit for the cover of Rolling Stone.

Performers have been making names for themselves via shock for years. Way back when, Liberace was one of the first shockers and was the king of outlandish outfits. He was one of the first pioneers of  “putting on the dog“.

Although Liberace’s voice was far from good, he did play a mean piano. And look at Elton John, who started out as sort of a meek country bumpkin and ended up going all Liberace on everyone, once fame came knocking on his door.

Elton was not only an elaborate dresser, but he had quite the collection of outrageous glasses, which became a signature for him. So was Elton copying Liberace? It really didn’t matter, because he can sing and play piano to boot.

There was David Bowie who dressed up as Zigggy Stardust, and Cyndi Lauper who started an entire fashion craze with her gobs of costume jewelry, and her poofy crinoline slips.

But again like Elton, this girl can sing.

Take the band Kiss for instance, who was popular in the 1970’s. They rose up in the ranks due to their alter ego wild costumes, pyrotechnics on stage and Gene Simmons spewing blood and wiggling that long snake of a tongue. It was freaky to see a band dressed like that with full face paint back  in the 1970’s, and it was very innovative. (I was never a Kiss fan though, I think their movie ruined it for me *snicker*) But they did have some talent to back up their look.

Alice Copper, another unusual performer, used to hang himself on stage complete with an entire gallows set up on stage. He also would whip bloody plastic baby dolls on stage during his Dead Babies song… but again…Cooper had the talent to rock the house.

Let’s not forget Dee Snyder in Twisted Sister, ok… never mind, we can forget that one.

(Just have to mention, and way off topic, but I think Christina Aguilera definitely stole Dee’s look when she did the video for Moulin Rouge).

And what about Boy George? He started out rather tame with Culture Club (well sort of) and then showed up in an airport one day dressed like a Geisha girl, and got more outrageous from there. But nobody can deny that the man possessed decent set of pipes on him. We won’t get into where he is today.

Back to Madonna…
But wait, there’s more…

Save Money – Live Worse, ALWAYS.

Two top stories on CNN right now feature the greatest place to buy the crappiest of crap in crapdom. Don’t get me wrong, I am forced to spend my stimulus checks at Walmart too, but I am not happy about it. Over the years, after discovering how sub-par many of the products are and how much of the merchandise comes from China (virtually 90% based on my expert analysis) I have been going to Target more and more. Plus, Target has a better level of customers. Think I am being a snob – read this:

“People of Wal-Mart,” a gag started by two 20-something brothers and their buddy to share crazy pictures with their friends, has gone viral. Promoted largely on sites like Digg and Funny or Die — and linked ad nauseam on Facebook and Twitter — the site picked up enough traffic to crash its servers on Wednesday.

“I’m still baffled — I really am,” said Andrew Kipple, 23, one of the creators of the site, who said his team was frantically working Wednesday to add enough server space to handle the surge in traffic.

Photos on the site, sent in by viewers all over the United States, frequently feature overweight people wearing tight clothes, bizarre hairstyles (with versions of the short-in-front, long-in-back “mullet” leading the pack) and fashion crimes ranging from furry leg warmers to miniskirts that leave absolutely nothing to the imagination.

So what inspired these two brothers to take their keen observation of the cultural phenomenon to the web? Hot messes of course:

Andrew and his brother Adam, 25, said they thought of the site after a visit to a South Carolina Wal-Mart where they saw a woman they believed to be a stripper, wearing an obscene T-shirt and leading a toddler in a harness. Around the next corner was a man with a beard reminiscent of the rock band ZZ Top.

“It’s kind of like the light bulb went off,” Andrew said. “We get the e-mails already from people who are like, ‘Why didn’t I think of this?’ We just happened to be fortunate enough to have the ability to actually follow through on it.”

While not every Walmart is as culturally rich in inappropriate attire and poorly executed hairstyles, the ones in the rural/and or southern parts of the country seem to attract an inordinate number of misfits. Cheap, poorly made goods in a consumer obsessed society is bound to have side effects and there’s no good reason we shouldn’t poke fun at these folks, many of whom live in very secluded little segments of this great country. Despite the internet’s ubiquity, there are still people who think a mullet, a wife beater and white socks and dress shoes is a fashion “do.”

So, VIVA WALMART!

Now, the bad Walmart News.

But wait, there’s more…