I’ll take Johnny Depp please!
Is that the way the clients of California Cryobank sperm bank order their baby makers?

Apparently the California Cryobank has come up with the idea of matching up their sperm donors with famous celebrity faces. Are they genius entrepreneurs helping their clients make a tough decision of who they should pick as their baby daddy? Or are they just trying to make more money than other sperm banks by claiming their donors are celebrity look alikes? Or both?

How does this sperm bank match their donor’s faces with celebrities? With high tech face-recognition? Nope!
Employees of Cryobank sit around a table and put the donor’s pictures up on a screen and argue which celebrity looks like that donor the most. When they come to a consensus, they add that information to the donor’s file, and then the donor’s name goes into a huge data bank. Clients can then search the data base for a donor by which celebrity they want their child to look like.

Although clients are not allowed to see the donor’s ACTUAL picture by law, clients can  search for a potential donor by picking out a celebrity name.

Too superficial?
How will the general public weigh in on this?

I wonder if someone will pass up a donor with a better IQ, for a donor that looks like Mario Lopez? I also wonder if people out there will pick a celebrity look alike in hopes on trying to cash in on their offspring down the line, especially if their child ends up as a dead ringer of a celebrity.

Hey Kate Gosselin, this has your name all over it! Only eight kids? What’s the big deal? The Duggars have you beat by a landslide! It can be your new show! “Kate Plus Eight Plus Elvis!”
And remember Kate, there is a plus side besides the new show…which ever donor you pick… he can’t take money out of your bank account! 

Now I have seen just about every way there is to make a buck in the ol’ USA, and a lot of it ain’t too pretty. And there are some wackos out there who may try to claim that their child is the child of an actual celebrity. I wouldn’t put it past them. Far fetched? Perhaps.

But take the case  of a women trying to collect millions from Keanu Reeves. She is claiming that he is the father of at least one of her four adult children.  *snicker*
Even though Reeves took a DNA test to prove that he wasn’t the father, and he also said he never met the women, she still isn’t backing off. 
What did Reeves have to say about this whole ordeal? 
Rest assured, he didn’t say, ”eeeeeexcellent!” *snicker*

Of course Cryobank does have a disclaimer to cover their butts in this overly litigious world:

“No celebrity is meant as an exact match for any donor, nor should you assume that your future children will look like any celebrity listed.”

NBC’s Today Show covered the sperm bank story, and on this video, you can see the employees sitting around a table with the donor’s picture on a screen and trying to figure out who the donors most resemble. Man, where do I sign up for this cream puff gig?

Scott Brown, communication manager of the California Cryobank said to NBC TODAY,

“It’s not that our donors look like celebrities, it’s that celebrities look like our donors,”

Oh! I see what he did there…. he is SO crafty!

You can also pick a young or older version of the celebrity too. Perhaps you would like a young Sean Connery as OO7, or the older more sophisticated Sean Connery. The choice is yours!

There are MANY stars as well as athletes listed in their data base. And let’s not forget musicians and the less than famous celebs. You can pick from Eddie Van Halen to Jackass reality star Stev-O!
I kid you not, he is on the list.
Wow, seriously…if anyone picks the Steve-O look alike, I am afraid I just don’t understand, unless he is a nuclear physicist.

 
So are there people out there opposed to this celebrity look alike baby daddy factory? YES.

Some snippets from NBC’s TODAY,

The program has its share of critics, especially in the bioethics world. University of Albany professor Bonnie Steinbock bashed California Cryobank’s celebrity-match program on CNN, saying, “There’s something strange about a culture that has stratified rigid types of beauty where everyone looks alike; now they’re trying to create children through who the actor of the moment is.”

Brown’s defense:

Not so, says Brown. While the process may seem superficial, it is actually extremely helpful in guiding prospective parents through a stressful and often confusing time, he asserts.

“Seem superficial”?
Some people would argue that it is superficial. But don’t people have the right to choose which donor they want for whatever reason, since they are the ones paying for it? And what if it does help the client make their choice?

Take the opinion of a perspective Mom who was trying to pick a donor:

“I’m flipping through the catalog with a friend of mine, feeling like I was about to recruit a basketball team, because it was just all stats.” And while she whittled down her list, the Cryobank couldn’t show her a picture of the donor — but it could tell her one of her finalists resembled Freddie Prinze Jr.
“For me, that clinched it right then and there,” she said. “I’ve always found him attractive!”

Freddie Prinze Jr.? Really? That clinched it for her? To each their own.

So matching a face to a donor may actually make some clients feel more at ease about who they pick, or actually help them to decide who to pick. I hope people have the good sense to pick donors with good qualities, rather than picking a donor because they like Orlando Bloom.
But then again, this is the land of the SUPER DUPER superficial, so nothing would surprise me.

I wonder if Cryobank’s business will be booming?

I can see it now…
Mothers with their kids are at the playground and one mother says to another,
“wow your little boy really looks like Leonardo DiCaprio! Any relation?” 

The proud Mom says, “Well no, it was donor #09756-QL5, we were really big fans of the movie Titanic, so that’s why we went with him”.

I guess if there is one guy who is a real dead ringer of a handsome celebrity, he will be in big demand and asked to come back quite often. There can be a panic at Cryobank if they run out!  What happens then?

It may go something like this:

“OMG! We are fresh out of the Ryan Reynolds look alike! Get 9087-K490L on the phone stat! Tell him we have some new vids and magazines! Yeah I know he has been in twice a day for the past month and he’s a bit tender… Chain him down again if you have to, until he puts out. We are in the baby making business people!”

MORE???

I guess in the long run it can become quite a lucrative and fun “job” if you are a celebrity look alike donor. What guy wouldn’t want this gig? At $50- $75 a pop, I am surprised that there is a job shortage for men in the US! Hell, they ain’t getting paid for doing it at home!

Tough luck for all you donors out there who look like Gary Busey (sorry Gary) or OJ Simpson. (not sorry OJ)

I imagine their “stuff” wouldn’t have too many takers and is probably passed up for the gloopus of a more hunkier looking celebrity look alike.

But things may not work out exactly the way you have planned. Even though you picked out your favorite celeb look alike, don’t forget there is a 50/50 chance that your child may be a girl and you may end up with a pretty scary looking child! And I am more than sure that Cryobank does not issue refunds for fuglies.

Very Scary Indeed!

I bet some clients just won’t really care if the donor they picked has only two brain cells….
Just as long as their celebrity knock off looks good in a tux!

During a press conferece  in Venice, actor and perpetual bachelor, George Clooney kept totally cool when he gets an unusual question from an admirer in the crowd. He didn’t seem surprised, nor were his feathers ruffled when the man proclaimed his love for George and said:

“George! Take me! Choose me, Please! Please choose me George!  May I kiss you please? Just one kiss!”

For a minute there I thought I was watching a scene from a Borat movie.

Clooney’s reaction was classic. He remained cool, calm and collected and totally owned the moment. He told the buff admirer:

“It’s hard when you take a big chance and it really doesn’t work. It’s always embarrassing when you take one real swing for the fences and it just falls flat. It’s a good try though!”

Yep, he stayed cool as a cucumber, continued cracking jokes and interestingly, complimented the man’s tie adding:

 ”There’s little ambulance on its way here. You stay there, we will get back to you.”

He was obviously dissing the man’s package size.

Then when someone from the Daily Mail gets up to ask him a question, George quips:

Take your clothes off before you answer this question.

I think George meant before you ASK this question, but we all know what he meant.

Personally, I think Clooney rather enjoyed the little (no diss intended) distraction and always seems ready to crack some jokes.
So to you Mr. Clooney…I take off my hat — that’s it though. I promise!

George Clooney is hopping mad. Apparently photographers climbed over the wall of his Italian estate and snapped some pictures that ended up published in two magazines. The pictures were of a topless 13 year old girl changing in one of the guest rooms of the estate. The thirteen year old was the daughter of Clooney’s house guest. Photographers also snapped pictures of Clooney and new gal pal hottie, Sardinian TV presenter, Elisabetta Canalis sharing a few moments in his yard.

etonline:

ET has learned that George Clooney will file suit against two magazines and a photographer after photos of a 13-year-old guest in his Italian home were taken and published.
The actor released the following statement to ET:

“We’re suing two magazines AND a photographer. I don’t know about the law in the United States but in Italy it’s illegal for photographers to climb over my wall and to take long lens pictures of a 13-year-old girl in her bedroom. I draw the line of privacy at that.”
The shots were published in two magazines. Keep checking back here for the latest details on this story.

Clooney’s summer home is a 15 room estate in Laglio called Villa Oleandra on Lake Como which he bought for a little over seven million from John Kerry. I am sure the property has doubled if not tripled in value by now.
This little bungalow,*snicker* has been SO advertised over the years, it is not a secret where Clooney likes to stay and play while in Italy. It also happens to sit on a Lake Como where anyone is free to travel on. Just one trip to YouTube revealed SEVERAL videos of Clooney’s estate from several people.

Clooney also did an Italian Fiat commercial in the past, and was interviewed at his estate not only by Italian reporters when he was promoting Good Night and Good Luck, but also filmed an entire interview with Diane Sawyer for ABC.

So my question is, did Clooney really think that having such a publicized estate would not blow up in his face some day?  Now I am of course not defending the photogrpahers taking pictures at all, but his residence has been so HIGHLY publicized, you would think at the very least he could of invested in some curtains or some blinds for all the windows? Or if he does have them for all the windows, he should tell people using his estate to close them while  they are changing? If you look at his estate in the picture above, you can see many windows lack any privacy. It’s a shame that celebrities can not buy a home and enjoy it in private, but everyone knows unfortunately that  being hounded is part of the not so fun world of being in the lime light.

Supposedly, Clooney was thinking of selling this Summer estate, when the Mayor of Laglio had big plans to include building a parking lot complete with lifts and moving walkways across the street from the village, as well as a floating bridge that would pass close to Clooney’s villa, Clooney said no dice. Clooney was so opposed to the plans, he joined a committee with locals to have the plans haulted. In 2007, he was quoted as saying:

“I don’t want my presence here to be a pain to the other citizens, but if you ask me these proposals are in every probability just to exploit the fact that I live here,”
“I have no problems with plans that are welcomed by the rest of the community,” he continued. “I am more than happy to sell up and move elsewhere — this project is absurd.”

The mayor did listen, and stopped the plans and stated:

“I decided to give up the project,” adding that Clooney is one of the village’s most beloved residents. “To mister Clooney we gave the honorary citizenship. We all are proud of his choice to live here on Lake Como.”

So kudos for Clooney for keeping Laglio the quaint place that it remains, but with this new development, honorary citizen or not….Clooney may feel that it may be better to pack up and move to a more private area, away from prying eyes.

I do think that Clooney should have kept his estate purchase a little bit more secretive and not publicize it as much as he did. People have camped out around his property to try to catch a glimpse, and security has even resorted to throwing apples at people to shoo them away. Although even with beefed up security, I still don’t see how that would stop tourists or others from taking a camera with a powerful lense and snapping some pictures from a boat on the lake. People can take site seeing tours on the lake. And let’s not forget high power binoculars too. Besides the fact that Clooney has had many famous pals visiting him, and recently offered his estate to David Beckham to stay in. So the photo ops for some juicy and very sellable photos are endless.

If you go to the Clooney Unlmited website, (I never knew this website existed, and it’s a bit obsessive to say the least) you will see TONS of pictures of Clooney in Lake Como. Clooney on his motorcycle, Clooney on his boat, Clooney swimming, you name it. The Mayor of Laglio even declared that Clooney’s estate was off limits and that anyone who did not abide by the ordinance, would be fined:

And the decision of the First citizen to sign an urgent, “with immediate effect and until a new provision – we read – there is no parking near the entrance of Villa Oleandra and related appliances (inputs Villa Margherita and properties up the road 71 Old Queen) and the formation of Capannelli 2 or more people in the stretch of road from the Queen of Laglio pier to the end of the house owned by Margaret and parking in the square of Soldino place in front of villa Oleandra. The order has no value for citizens or residents in the town of Laglio. For offenders, a minimum fine of 19 euro will be the warning, but to repeat the amount could rise rapidly.

Well I guess that didn’t work.
AGAIN, maybe an easier solution would be to make sure that all blinds are kept closed.When Clooney buys his next estate, perhaps he should try to keep the purchase more on the DL and close the damn blinds!

By Golly These Things Really Do Work!

George Clooney is a versatile guy. He directs, produces, acts, dates Las Vegas cocktail waitresses, gets Oscar Nominations, has a famous aunt, and he thinks Renee Zellweger is NOT cute and has no talent. Well, I think he was joking on those last two. Too bad really, I sort of agreed with him.

George and squishy-faced actress Renee Zellweger star in a new film about the early days of football, titled Leatherheads. Clooney also directs the film and he talks about having to perform these dual roles, getting tackled, directing and kissing Renee Zellweger, which may or may not be better than it sounds, in the new issue of Parade Magazine:

You were in the middle of the action when the going got ugly in some of the games.

“I directed myself to get in there and just do it. You had to learn how to play differently because there weren’t many rules and players got mean and dirty. It was hard on us because in those days they didn’t use pads. There’s just no way you could prepare for getting hit by a 21-year-old football player. Nothing you could do. It was just, ‘Ow. That really hurt.’”

Was it a little strange to play football in a time where the penalties were few and far between?

“Obviously, the sport today wouldn’t work without rules. There’s no question about it. But we used to play pick up games of football. And they were more fun because you’re smacking each other in the head. You’re holding other players down. So it was fun to see how far you could go without rules. And I think that sort of works in life, as well. I think that some rules are made to be broken. And sometimes it’s fun to push right up against them.”

How was it directing yourself?

“You give yourself less takes because it would look awful if you were to do more for yourself than the other actors. That doesn’t fly very well. But I’ve gone through the movie a thousand times before we start shooting, so I know pretty much what I need in the scene. But most of the time it’s just embarrassing to run from behind the camera and jump into a scene.”

How about directing Renee Zellweger?

“You know what the problem is? She has no talent. And she’s not cute. And it was very hard for me to work with her. No, she’s smart. She can do anything. She can deliver a punch line with the best of them. And she’s one of the sweetest, nicest people on earth. And she’s a dear friend.”

How many takes did you give yourself in the kissing scene with her?

“That’s the one thing I can’t remember.”

Renee, who strikes me as a bit of a caricature of herself, more than the genuine article, also spoke with Parade about Leatherheads, working with Hollywood’s favorite leading man, watching men in tight uniforms and being on the other end of tabloid journalism:

Didn’t you feel a little left out sitting on the sidelines while the guys were going at it on the football field?

“Those boys look pretty good in their tight uniforms, especially when they were rolling around on a muddy field. A girl needs to catch warm-up practice, don’t you think?

Come on, didn’t you throw a football just for fun between takes?

“I did, and I looked ridiculous. Are you kidding me? I had on my hat with the feather, and my little high heeled buckled shoes and gloves while I was throwing the pigskin, but I couldn’t help myself. When I gave it a toss, the director, that would be Mr. Clooney, scolded me and said, ‘You put that thing down. What am I going to do with you when you miss and take one on the nose and we’ve got a close up? Put that ball down.’ I thought he was a spoil sport.”

So what’s George Clooney really like?

“Just as you’d expect, he’s funny and witty. But on set, as much fun as he is, he’s also very focused. He has the process of a filmmaker, who’s much more seasoned than he is, like someone who’s been doing this for 35 years, not five.”

What was it like to have to unleash a lot of rapid-fire dialogue?

“That was an exercise in concentration of focus. That’s for sure. There were some large mouthfuls of lines to learn. No time to drop the ball on that one. No pun intended. But it was fun.”

You play a reporter who’s trying to uncover the unpleasant past of a pro-star. Did you feel a little like you were working for TMZ?

“I don’t know that I’d want that kind of responsibility of having the power to hurt someone with a public disclosure. But, ironically, I intended to be a reporter before I got into acting. I majored in journalism, so it was kind of fun to explore that. But I could never write a story that would have a big, negative impact on somebody’s life. I don’t think I’d sit well with that.”

Oh, don’t worry Renee, you get used to it.