It’s hump day and what’s been going on in the world of celebrity gossip lately?
Same old crap and some new crap.

Lindsey Lohan went to court and partied the night before and the night after her court hearing. Yawn!
But wait… she said she’s afraid her Dad may kidnap her now. Uh.. again yawn. Wake me up when she does something new.

What’s also up?
Not Balloon Boy!  That news is SO rampant, that I am already tired of it. But it looks like reality has caught up with the Heenes. Honestly, I caught these loons on Wife Swap a while back and the father was a hot headed, delusional wacko, who thinks the sun rises and sets by him. I thought this man was questionable way back then, but you can’t always tell, with the way “reality” shows edit their shows. But now we know for sure. Yep! My gut instinct was totally spot on.

Now I think his wife is either abused and doesn’t know enough to get away and agrees with everything her idiot husband does regardless, or she actually agrees with everything her hubby does and also thinks you should raise your children by dragging them to twister romps and pulling them out of school and allowing them to trash talk to whomever they want. Either scenario is SAD. 
Oh! Have you seen their video on YouTube? I can’t understand what the hell they are singing about, but it looks pretty darn questionable. Future Beastie Boys ya think?

I wonder if wifey-poo will throw hubby under the bus, when it comes down to their day in court? Get out the popcorn! And as far as reality fame goes? Heenes… you got it now! Yah happy?

And more people who get under my skin…
Elisabeth Hasselbeck is back on The View. (oh joy) 
I guess little Ms. Perfect sent out some not so perfect baby pictures of her baby AND a guest appearance of her nipple to her friends and family by mistake. HA HA HA! This story brought me so much joy.

On to other idiots…
Rod Blagojevich (again NOT a celebrity), WILL appear on Celebrity Apprentice, yet another reason not to watch Trump’s show ever again.

And even more idiots…
Stephanie Pratt was busted for DUI. I wonder what bible thumper sista -in-law Heidi Montag will have to say about this? Maybe Heidi can get Stephen Baldwin to baptize Stephanie for her. ‘Cause we all know just how beneficial it was for Heidi. Praise Jesus!

And on to the King  and Queen of idiots…
Jon Gosselin is still hated by the majority of America. Well wait a minute…I stand corrected. Octomom, Nadya Suleman told Radar Online she thought Jon Gosselin was hot and has a crush on him. Ummm… hot?Perhaps Nadya needs her eyes checked and should pick up a paper every once in a while. Oh that’s right, she has 14 children, who has time?

But sorry Octomon, Jon was too busy getting his sexy on in a fancy cab with gal pal Hailey Glassman.
Hey Jon, you sure you want to pass this up? Could be a new show fer yah!
How about “John +Nadya +14+ 8 = The Earth Spinning Off It’s Axis”?

Well not if TLC has anything to say about it! They are already suing Jon for breech of contract, of course.
And he also has been ordered to pay back $180,00.00 back to his account with Kate. Kate ALSO has been ordered to pay some money back too. Seems like Karma has been rearing it’s ugly head with those two.

And speaking of Octomom, the Doc that implanted the SIX embryos (one split into two) into Octomom has been booted from the practice where he was employed for not following the rules. But of course he is still allowed to practice. Who knows what he will do now that he is on his own. I smell another reality show?
I can hear the promo now…
“Meet Dr. Eggo! He’s serving them sunny side up, so you too can have your very own reality show and start exploiting your very own litter of children in no time! Hey! Let Go Of My Eggo!”

Seriously, have you seen the latest clip of Octomon and her brood with all those kids crying? It makes me want to pull my hair out.

Speaking of child exploitation, Kate Gosselin tells Vanity Fair she ”feels like a prisoner” of her own fame and that the kids are starting to act out. STARTING to act out? Wow, if seeing Maddy in previous shows was only the start of her bitchdom, I woudn’t want to see her now. That child is not a force to be reckoned with! And please Kate…  let me get out the violin….you were being interviewed by VANITY FAIR and getting paid for it. Prisoner my ass!

On to more phony things….
Miss California, Carrie Prejean is being sued for her her boobs! K2 Productions (which directs the California USA pageant ) is asking Carrie for $5,200 back. I guess they paid for her boob job. K2 says it’s not about the money, and the money will go to charity. I doubt if will want the implants back. *snicker*

Speaking of cash….
Nicholas Cage is in a heap of debt. Cage is suing his former manager Samuel Levin for $20 million. Levin allegedly screwed with Cage’s money and Cage says that his manager is the one responsible for his current debt headache. Word of advice Nick…. don’t wait seven years before you check up on hired help that handles all your dough.

And on to big sloppy messes…
Anna Nicole Smith is back in the news again. Well, the court case of her doctors and Howard Stern that is.
In court, Larry Birkhead told a scathing account of Anna’s drug use while she was pregnant. 

Maurice Brighthaupt, former bodyguard of Anna, claims he saw Howard Stern, and Dr. Eroshevich injecting Anna with needles. He also said he saw Anna injecting herself. Why did this guy wait so long with this information? Supposedly Dr. Eroshevich was the bodyguard’s friend, as well as Stern. Sorry! No excuse.

Supposedly Anna Nicole was drinking pedialyte out of a baby bottle and laying in her own feces when found. Why was she ever brought to Florida in this condition? Now I know Anna was a complete mess with drugs, but when someone is that addicted to drugs and that incapacitated, she should have received help from the people around her, especially her doctors and those closest to her. Not checking into a Florida hotel. Stern was not present at her death, he was busy seeing a man about boat.

The IRS is also in play with Anna Nicole these days, and have filed a $125,112.86 tax lien on the estate of Vickie Lynn Marshall. So much for resting in Peace. Geez, what a mess.

And some weirdness in the news…
Marge Simpson is on the cover of Playboy’s October issue. Sorry, I didn’t find it at all amusing and I refuse to show a picture of it.
In fact I poo poo Playboy for advertising the Simpsons.

Nancy Cartwright, the voice of Bart Simpson, Scientologist extraordinaire, donated TEN MILLLION DOLLARS to Scientology in May of 2008. Anyone that supports the Simpsons in any way is inadvertently giving money to Scientology down the line. Why would Cartwright give the money to her children, when she would rather hand it over to Scientology? Gotta keep everything KSW! (Keep Scientology Working) Right Nancy? Hope she wakes up some day.

Speaking of naughty pictures.
Levi Johnston (former husband of Bristol Palin) will be posing for Playgirl and has been in the gym bulking up for his upcoming saucy shots. I also caught him on a commercial for Wonderful Pistachio nuts. Yes, the man who will soon be showing his nuts was hawking nuts on TV. The commercial shows him with an immense bodyguard and Levi is eating a few nuts and the tag line says “Now Levi Johnston does it with protection”
I kid you not. See the commercial for yourself!
Wow! Talking about pissing Palin off! Yeehaw!

But wait it gets better….
Levi was interviewed by Vanity Fair. The name of the article is “Me and Mrs. Palin”.

Levi dishes about Palin and her lack of parenting, her bad moods, Todd flipping out and Levi was quoted as saying,

“I thought, Was this woman—who, at home, would literally say things that did not make sense—really running for vice president?”

You go Levi! I have a new respect for the boy. *snicker*

Then we move on to more puzzling things…
The court case of John Travolta.
Readers are probably wondering why I haven’t reported on this case as of yet. The testimonies in the court case were changing on a such a daily basis with so much “he said/she said” garbage going on, and with changing stories, that if I wrote about what was happening as it happened, I would have had to edit the story every single day.

I will be covering this story when and if I feel that some sort of conclusion of sorts has been made. I will say that this case has been one big puzzle of unanswered questions on BOTH sides.

And speaking of The Travoltas moving on …
Both Kelly and John attended the IAS (International Association of Scientologists)
Scientology 25th Anniversary at Scientology’s St. Hill Org in England.
Sadly, it looks like John will not be leaving this cult any time soon.

Tom Cruise, Katie and Suri were also in attendance. Poor Katie and Suri.

Scientology wanted people to believe that 4,000 people were in attendance at their event. ROTFL!
That number is just classic Scientology spin in which they are so famous for. They usually have to fly and bus tons of people in, as well as dressing up their Sea Orgers members to fill in the seats so it will look full. Reason for this? So their IAS PR photo will look like they are still successful to their members. It’s an old smoke and mirrors trick of Scientology, so they can continue to deceive their members. Lovely, isn’t it?

The IAS is nothing more than members donating money to Scientology. (which the majority goes straight to cult leader David Miscavige) In return for their donation, they get a discount on courses, auditing and such. Which is not a discount at all since they are donating money. Duh!

Cruise and Travoilta have donated millions and millions of dolllars to Scientology. Exactly what Scientology does with all that money as fas as “helping” to “clear the planet”  is a mystery. The money goes to buy more buildings that stand idle, make Miscavige richer and pay for all their pending court cases, lawyers and Sci goons. Oh! and I almost forgot, they have to pay their Sea Org slave labor members about .25 cents an hour.

US Magazine reported on the 25th Anniversary and quoted Cruise about the Scientology protestors outside the event:

Later, during a reception, Cruise was overheard chatting with another American man about the protesters outside the venue. “They’re squirrels,” Cruise said angrily, according to a witness. “Stuck in an electronic incident. It makes me so angry!”

“Protesters are squirrels stuck in an electronic incident?”
Oh Tom, you certainly are one brainwashed mofo.
A ”squirrel” in scio-speak, means someone that messes or changes the tech of dead cult founder L. Ron Hubbard. Aka “squirreling the tech”. And “stuck in an electronic incident” is more scio babble from Hubbard’s work.

I wonder if Cruise actually said this though? Personally, I think if anything he would of called the protesters SP’s (suppressive people) not squirrels. And I think the “stuck in an electronic incident” line may have been borrowed from a video of another wacky Scientologist named George, which we reported on recently. Many duplicate videos of Scientologist George (who is an OTVIII, the highest that you can get on Scientology’s Bridge) showed up on YouTube and showed just how brainwashed Scientologists become the longer they stay in. The video is totally unscripted and SAD.

Cruise is supposedly an OTVII on The Bridge To Nowhere.

One more level to go Tom until you reach the tippety top to the Bridge of Total Freedom!
Yippee!
Good luck with that Tom! Wait till you see what OTVIII is all about!
SO worth the millions and millions of dollars that you blew. *snicker*

And now for something completely different and funny….
I was watching TV the other night, and there was a brief teaser for Season 6 of the steamy Nip /Tuck show, which started on Oct 14th. I thought I was seeing things, when I saw Mario Lopez completely decked out in black lingerie complete with a garter belt and black stockings. But no, I looked it up and yep it was none other than A. C. Slater (his name on Saved By The Bell) in drag!

Mario played Dr. Mike Hamoui on the series and he was seen in a steamy shower scene in a previous episode. Damn! I am going to have to start watching that show! Kudos for Mario for having the balls of steel for donning the less than flattering get up.

And even though Mario is one huge piece of eye candy…
sorry, this outfit just doesn’t cut it for me Mario. *snicker*

Looks like Dr. Phil has a wacky gold digger to contend with.

Shirley Dieu, is alleging that Dr. Phil AND his crew, held her captive, brainwashed her, touched her naughty bits, and also paraded a nude man in front of her when she partook in a Dr. Phil’s House show.

Wow! Where can I sign up? Sounds like one hell of a weekend! *snicker*

I only mentioned some of the more juicier claims by Shirley. There are a hell of a lot more. AND she waited two years to file the case after the supposed “incidents” occurred.
She claimed that she was too afraid. Now I can understand her being afraid of Oprah…. But Dr. Phil?

Oh wait… Oprah owns Dr. Phil’s butt. I guess her claim of being afraid does sound like a reasonable explanation now. I kid.

Shirley filed her lawsuit in LA yesterday, and she will be representing herself. *laughs holding sides*
I wonder how they kept a straight face when they saw her lawsuit?

Wow, representing yourself, huh Shirley?
No surprise there. What lawyer in their right mind would even touch this case with a ten foot pole?
After all Johnnie Cochran is gone. *snicker*

Apparently, Shirley is not a stranger to filing cases. She has a history of being slightly litigious to say the least AND to make this case more snarkier, she filed for bankruptcy last year. Sounds like Shirley is in need of some cash.

A snippette from People:

“It’s unclear how much she is seeking in damages but Dieu – who filed a malpractice suit against an Orange County hospital in 2002 and sued a car dealership in 2007 – is acting as her own attorney, and her filing is filled with misspellings and grammatical errors.”

“Misspellings and Grammatical errors?” Sounds like I filed it! *HA!*

Eonline had the whole story:

Dr. Phil’s Bedside Manner: Brainwashing, Groping, Falsely Imprisoning?

We don’t know what the disease was, but this is one instance where the treatment was definitely worse. Much, much, creepily worse, if the allegations are true.

Dr. Phil McGraw was on the receiving end of a bizarre and damning, to say the least, lawsuit yesterday, with a former female patient of his alleging that the TV doctor and select members of his production staff held her captive, brainwashed her and subjected her to constant exposure by a naked man, among other accusations.

As if that weren’t enough, she also claims that McGraw even once groped her during a therapy session.

All told, the 56-year-old Shirley Dieu is suing McGraw, Paramount Pictures, which produces his show and on whose lot the alleged captivity took place, two show producers and another doctor, for brainwashing, indecent exposure, illegal touching assault and battery, public ridicule and humiliation, mental and physical abuse, fraud, negligence and intentional harm, practicing without a license, intentional infliction of emotional distress, and preventing a witness from reporting a crime.

That’s it—one more batch of scandalous talk show host allegations and we’re looking at a trend.

Dieu is representing herself in the case and filed the suit in Los Angeles Superior Court yesterday over the incidents, which she claims went down almost exactly two years ago to the day. There’s no word on why she waited so long to file the suit, but more pressing legal matters could be to blame. Dieu filed for bankruptcy in 2008 and seems to have a rather sue-happy past.

As for the current list of alleged wrongdoings, Dieu claims they took place between Oct. 9 and Oct. 11, 2007.

While she does not specify why or for what ailment she sought Dr. Phil’s assistance, she claims she was held captive in his Hollywood studio, itself bordered by 12-foot walls and fences, where despite repeated attempts to escape she was told to stay and even physically prevented from leaving.

She claims she was unethically and illegally being treated by McGraw, who she claims is not licensed to practice in California. And while her diagnosis is unclear, she makes no bones about the prescription.

Dieu claims she was “forced to be in the same room with a completely naked live man while he exposed his entire naked body, genitals and all.”

During her involuntary stay, she says staff not only prevented her from leaving but cut the phone lines when she attempted to call 911. She says she was denied access to her cell phone and was routinely promised food, books and other items which never materialized.

At one point, she claims she “was told to sit in one spot for an unrealistic amount of time and told to not leave her seat.” When she attempted to get up, she was “touched inappropriately in order to prevent her from escaping.”

Dieu also says she was “brainwashed to trust her captures” and “programmed” to believe she was in a safe environment and receiving “real therapy from a licensed doctor.”

According to the court documents, she says she suffered public ridicule and humiliation when she was subjected to edited tapings that “mislead the public” and warped her depicted personality.

As for the TV doctor, she claims that during an Oct. 9 therapy session with Dr. Phil, she “was touched on her left breast.” She went on to say that she was afraid to say anything about it at the time, but that she was “touched improperly” by some of the other defendants (other than McGraw, she doesn’t name names).

 She claims the experience resulted in severe trauma and caused her to seek therapy—well, more therapy—and led to her hospitalization.

She is seeking unlimited general damages, punitive damages, exemplary damages, fees and court costs.

Now I am not a fan of Dr. Phil in ANY capacity.
First off, he is NOT a doctor. I find his voice very annoying, and I can not stand his ”Dr. Phil-isms”.
Like…”You are prettier than a speckled pup in a red wagon“. (someone actually said that to me in Tennesee once… I almost married him)

Sorry Shirley…
I just can’t picture Dr. Phil, ”the chrome dome” sexually or mentally abusing anyone. And it makes me queasy just to think about it. *shudder*
I wonder if his wife Robin calls him “Quick Draw McGraw”?
*double shudder*

I digress…
So I think it is safe to say that Dr. Phil won’t be spending any time in the pokey. I can be wrong though. 
You never know. I was a bit shocked over the whole David Letterman scandal.
But if I am wrong… I will eat my hat. (note to self… buy a hat)

After Dr. Phil was made aware of Shirley’s lovely lawsuit and he stopped laughing, (I can only assume) he had this comment:

“All of Shirley Rae Dieu’s claims are without merit. As with all of the occupants of the DR. PHIL House, Ms. Dieu participated voluntarily, having submitted her personal story with the hope that she could confront, and overcome, her individual issues.”

I think that is a nice way of Dr. Phil telling Shirley to stick it wear the sun don’t shine.

Perhaps Dr. Phil can offer Shirely some much needed counseling?
Oh snap!

Rumors have been circulating lately about the gender or shall I say the genders of Lady GaGa. Many people thought that The Princess of Pop (yeessh) is a hermaphrodite. For those of you who do not know what a hermaphrodite is, it is a person born with both male and female genitalia.

The picture that had everyone a-buzz, is the one below. It clearly shows a “bulge” of some sort in the crotch region.

People were wondering, if this was carefully placed “package” for shock value for her career? Or a photo-shopped picture? Or is Lady (I use the term lightly) more than just a lady?

Well Lady finally came forward and put an end to the rumors and said that “she was not offended, but her beautiful vagina was very offended”.  Thank God that is cleared up, I will no longer have sleepless nights. *snicker*

Wait….what did she say? Her beautiful vagina? Who the hell talks publicly (or at all for that matter) about having a beautiful vagina? (with the exception of the Vagina Monologues)
Wow!  Talk about being totally full of themselves.

The Examiner.com reported:

Since the hermaphrodite rumors started circling around Lady Gaga back in August, the singer has kept quiet about whether or not she has both parts.

Lady Gaga reportedly told an Australian radio station, “My beautiful vagina is very offended. I’m not offended; my vagina is offended. I’m not embarrassed. I sold four million records in six months; I’m not embarrassed about anything. I think this is society’s reaction to a strong woman.”

“The idea that we equate strength with men and a penis is a symbol of male strength, you know, it is what it is. But like I said,” the dance-pop diva reiterated, “I am not offended at all, but my vagina might be a little bit upset,” she added.

The singer has been flaunting her naked body in various magazines since the rumors began, hoping to disprove that she may have both man and lady parts, but we all know what a little Photoshop can do.

What do you think? Is Lady Gaga telling the truth or just deny, deny, denying?

My reply? Who gives a damn? Sorry, I could care less what she’s packing, and besides, what’s the difference? Are people saying if GaGa was a hermaphrodite that they wouldn’t be fans any more? Why, can’t a hermaphrodite be a diva too?

This story oddly peaked my interest and I decided to look more into GaGa’s music, since I wasn’t too familiar with it, and I wanted to see what the fuss was all about. What I discovered wasn’t much. I found an ok looking gal who loves to dress in kooky outfits and writes some really lousy songs.

GaGa is going the ol’ shock diva route because she basically needs those costumes and stage performances to hide her lack of talent. Her audience needs a lot of distractions. And now that she has a following, he crappy songs wont’ matter as much.
 
Her voice and song style comes pretty close to Madonnas, although Madonna’s songs were better written. Now I am not a fan of Madonna’s either, but nobody can deny that when Madonna blew up big in the 80’s that she was at least original and her songs were much better than GaGa’s. 

I have to say, that some of GaGa’s outfits are very cool, I will at least give her that. I love the way she sometimes meshes a vintage look with wackiness and forms some pretty outrageous get-ups. BUT…is that it? Yes, that’s it.

Let’s not forget this has been done a hundred times over in the music biz, and way before she strapped on that bubble suit for the cover of Rolling Stone.

Performers have been making names for themselves via shock for years. Way back when, Liberace was one of the first shockers and was the king of outlandish outfits. He was one of the first pioneers of  “putting on the dog“.

Although Liberace’s voice was far from good, he did play a mean piano. And look at Elton John, who started out as sort of a meek country bumpkin and ended up going all Liberace on everyone, once fame came knocking on his door.

Elton was not only an elaborate dresser, but he had quite the collection of outrageous glasses, which became a signature for him. So was Elton copying Liberace? It really didn’t matter, because he can sing and play piano to boot.

There was David Bowie who dressed up as Zigggy Stardust, and Cyndi Lauper who started an entire fashion craze with her gobs of costume jewelry, and her poofy crinoline slips.

But again like Elton, this girl can sing.

Take the band Kiss for instance, who was popular in the 1970’s. They rose up in the ranks due to their alter ego wild costumes, pyrotechnics on stage and Gene Simmons spewing blood and wiggling that long snake of a tongue. It was freaky to see a band dressed like that with full face paint back  in the 1970’s, and it was very innovative. (I was never a Kiss fan though, I think their movie ruined it for me *snicker*) But they did have some talent to back up their look.

Alice Copper, another unusual performer, used to hang himself on stage complete with an entire gallows set up on stage. He also would whip bloody plastic baby dolls on stage during his Dead Babies song… but again…Cooper had the talent to rock the house.

Let’s not forget Dee Snyder in Twisted Sister, ok… never mind, we can forget that one.

(Just have to mention, and way off topic, but I think Christina Aguilera definitely stole Dee’s look when she did the video for Moulin Rouge).

And what about Boy George? He started out rather tame with Culture Club (well sort of) and then showed up in an airport one day dressed like a Geisha girl, and got more outrageous from there. But nobody can deny that the man possessed decent set of pipes on him. We won’t get into where he is today.

Back to Madonna…
But wait, there’s more…

George Clooney is hopping mad. Apparently photographers climbed over the wall of his Italian estate and snapped some pictures that ended up published in two magazines. The pictures were of a topless 13 year old girl changing in one of the guest rooms of the estate. The thirteen year old was the daughter of Clooney’s house guest. Photographers also snapped pictures of Clooney and new gal pal hottie, Sardinian TV presenter, Elisabetta Canalis sharing a few moments in his yard.

etonline:

ET has learned that George Clooney will file suit against two magazines and a photographer after photos of a 13-year-old guest in his Italian home were taken and published.
The actor released the following statement to ET:

“We’re suing two magazines AND a photographer. I don’t know about the law in the United States but in Italy it’s illegal for photographers to climb over my wall and to take long lens pictures of a 13-year-old girl in her bedroom. I draw the line of privacy at that.”
The shots were published in two magazines. Keep checking back here for the latest details on this story.

Clooney’s summer home is a 15 room estate in Laglio called Villa Oleandra on Lake Como which he bought for a little over seven million from John Kerry. I am sure the property has doubled if not tripled in value by now.
This little bungalow,*snicker* has been SO advertised over the years, it is not a secret where Clooney likes to stay and play while in Italy. It also happens to sit on a Lake Como where anyone is free to travel on. Just one trip to YouTube revealed SEVERAL videos of Clooney’s estate from several people.

Clooney also did an Italian Fiat commercial in the past, and was interviewed at his estate not only by Italian reporters when he was promoting Good Night and Good Luck, but also filmed an entire interview with Diane Sawyer for ABC.

So my question is, did Clooney really think that having such a publicized estate would not blow up in his face some day?  Now I am of course not defending the photogrpahers taking pictures at all, but his residence has been so HIGHLY publicized, you would think at the very least he could of invested in some curtains or some blinds for all the windows? Or if he does have them for all the windows, he should tell people using his estate to close them while  they are changing? If you look at his estate in the picture above, you can see many windows lack any privacy. It’s a shame that celebrities can not buy a home and enjoy it in private, but everyone knows unfortunately that  being hounded is part of the not so fun world of being in the lime light.

Supposedly, Clooney was thinking of selling this Summer estate, when the Mayor of Laglio had big plans to include building a parking lot complete with lifts and moving walkways across the street from the village, as well as a floating bridge that would pass close to Clooney’s villa, Clooney said no dice. Clooney was so opposed to the plans, he joined a committee with locals to have the plans haulted. In 2007, he was quoted as saying:

“I don’t want my presence here to be a pain to the other citizens, but if you ask me these proposals are in every probability just to exploit the fact that I live here,”
“I have no problems with plans that are welcomed by the rest of the community,” he continued. “I am more than happy to sell up and move elsewhere — this project is absurd.”

The mayor did listen, and stopped the plans and stated:

“I decided to give up the project,” adding that Clooney is one of the village’s most beloved residents. “To mister Clooney we gave the honorary citizenship. We all are proud of his choice to live here on Lake Como.”

So kudos for Clooney for keeping Laglio the quaint place that it remains, but with this new development, honorary citizen or not….Clooney may feel that it may be better to pack up and move to a more private area, away from prying eyes.

I do think that Clooney should have kept his estate purchase a little bit more secretive and not publicize it as much as he did. People have camped out around his property to try to catch a glimpse, and security has even resorted to throwing apples at people to shoo them away. Although even with beefed up security, I still don’t see how that would stop tourists or others from taking a camera with a powerful lense and snapping some pictures from a boat on the lake. People can take site seeing tours on the lake. And let’s not forget high power binoculars too. Besides the fact that Clooney has had many famous pals visiting him, and recently offered his estate to David Beckham to stay in. So the photo ops for some juicy and very sellable photos are endless.

If you go to the Clooney Unlmited website, (I never knew this website existed, and it’s a bit obsessive to say the least) you will see TONS of pictures of Clooney in Lake Como. Clooney on his motorcycle, Clooney on his boat, Clooney swimming, you name it. The Mayor of Laglio even declared that Clooney’s estate was off limits and that anyone who did not abide by the ordinance, would be fined:

And the decision of the First citizen to sign an urgent, “with immediate effect and until a new provision – we read – there is no parking near the entrance of Villa Oleandra and related appliances (inputs Villa Margherita and properties up the road 71 Old Queen) and the formation of Capannelli 2 or more people in the stretch of road from the Queen of Laglio pier to the end of the house owned by Margaret and parking in the square of Soldino place in front of villa Oleandra. The order has no value for citizens or residents in the town of Laglio. For offenders, a minimum fine of 19 euro will be the warning, but to repeat the amount could rise rapidly.

Well I guess that didn’t work.
AGAIN, maybe an easier solution would be to make sure that all blinds are kept closed.When Clooney buys his next estate, perhaps he should try to keep the purchase more on the DL and close the damn blinds!

By Golly These Things Really Do Work!

Above is video of Disney’s “Hannah Montana” star Miley Cyrus performing at Fox’s 2009 Teen Choice Awards. Why yes, that is a stripper pole on an ice cream cart. Nothing says wholesome like combining skeevy strip-tease tools and child-hood sweets — it’s like a dream conjured up in the mind of perverts.

Miley’s image is a disaster for Disney and for Miley. Sure she may be worth millions now (let’s hope she invests wisely) but ask any former teen star how hard it is to transition from teen star to adult star and most would have harrowing tales to tell. Lindsay, Britney, Mischa and Vanessa Hudgens (on the heels of a more nude photos leaked) certainly could fill us all in on that challenge, and then some. It’s not impossible to do it, but you need to have a team of caring, moral and ethical people around you in order to survive with your dignity intact.

For Miley, it’s been one disaster after another. First it was the risque photos leaked to the media, then the botched Vanity Fair photo shoot, not to mention the catty YouTube videos poking fun at fellow Disney star Selena Gomez, and of course, the racial insensitivity. One would think whoever does PR for Miley might try a little harder. And this latest effort, is NOT what I would call “trying harder.”

Miley Cyrus is reviled in our home and my 9-year old daughter came to this conclusion on her own. It’s only a matter of time until Miley’s string of poor choices finally catch up with her within the entire tween demographic. It always does.

I understand that I am in a unique position from most parents, I see ALL of Miley’s missteps, and therefore I am much more astute at figuring out this young girl is a TRAINWRECK waiting to happen. Clearly, Miley and her camp are on the Britney Spears roadmap to fame: whore them out early and often. Not only does this brand Miley for the next generation of consumers, but it also helps sexualize her long before she is even fully mature. Everyone knows sex sells, and Miley’s parents and handlers are no exception.

I know I am not the only one who thinks this is both sick, perverse and twisted. Most of my fellow moms have banned Miley from their household, and the trend is growing. Isn’t it bad enough Miley has middle-aged men stalking her? You’d think that would be a wake-up call to her parents. This isn’t the norm, this is the exception. There are plenty of young, talented women who are famous, who DON’T have a negative image to overcome. These young women have managed to avoid the cliched pitfalls of Hollywood, simply because they chose a personal set of standards, modesty and dare I say,personal safety, over a fistful of dollars.

It may be a common refrain, but it bears repeating: why do we continue to sexualize our children before they have even gained enough life experience to understand their OWN sexuality?

The blame isn’t solely Miley’s, who by all accounts, is still a child. There is plenty to go around, namely her parents Tish and Billy Ray, who clearly have been blinded by the millions to be gained by pimping out their daughter at an early age. Clearly, these two are too stupid to have learned anything from the Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan fiascos — how many young girls must we trash before we change our ways?

My daughter, hardly unique in her maturity and level of sophistication, saw through the Miley machine pretty quickly. When she walks through Wal-Mart and makes gagging sounds at all the garish displays of Miley merchandise, or the revealing photos on the nightly news, it’s not hard to put it all together. This isn’t genuine, real or lasting. Miley is a fabrication of Hollywood, and while some kids may be blinded by fan worship, many others see through the ruse, and in time Miley’s facade and slick production won’t translate to her maturing fan base.

When a 9-year old says “Miley makes me uncomfortable. Why is she posing almost nude Mom?” then you KNOW something is wrong.

Makes me glad we skipped the Teen Choice Awards, I sure don’t feel ready to explain the stripper pole to my kids.

The whole Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana thing is as dumb as her daddy’s accent, but to make matters worse, now Billy Ray goes on the “Today” show and makes a bunch of lame excuses for why he was unaware his daughter, all 15 years of her, agreed to some soft-core porn style pictures, despite her squeaky clean Disney spoon-fed image.

Can you imagine how refreshing it would be for a famous person to just get up there and say, “Hey, I am an entertainer. I am not bright or very smart. In fact, I do stupid things sometimes. I suck. Please forgive me” ?

Not only that, the pictures were yucky. Miley hasn’t even grown into that mug of hers. Sheesh, can’t we let kids grow up first before we start whoring them out.

Hollywood is yucky.

Found via Dlisted.

Apparently Brooke Hogan can’t apply her own suntan oil, so she has daddy Hulk do it for her.  I take it they didn’t read my post the other day about the dangers of being fair and getting too much sun.  Oh yeah, and this is just creepy to look at.

Very few photos make me literally jump with surprise and fright, but these did.

Apparently Brooke got over her feelings of betrayal that her daddy was boinking her best friend…

They seem to be doing pretty well at playing happy families, although perhaps they should have taken this scene indoors.

What else can I say about these?  I need to go wash out my eyes with some Mercurochrome or something.

 

You know, when I first read this, it reminded me of manipulators who take someone emotionally weaker than they are and work on that, telling them that their family and friends don’t care any more, that the manipulator is the only one who TRULY cares.  I could be wrong, but then again…?

[Sam] Lutfi said of [Britney's] family, “They have an agenda. Their agenda is jealously because they don’t fit in. I do. They see her three times a year.”

Britney was by the phone during Lutfi’s conversation with [Harvey] Levin [owner of TMZ]. Lutfi claimed he did not force Britney to buy a car, asking Brit, “Did I force you to buy a car.” In a heavy southern accent she responded, “No.” He continued, “Do I ever bug you.” She replied, “We argue.”

Is anyone else totally creeped out by that?  It’s like the manipulator and his prisoner…he brings her up out of her box to stand there and parrot monosyllabic answers while he does all the talking.

But what else is interesting about this little tidbit is this line:

Lutfi said there was no intervention last night, but then said Britney’s family “barged in.” For the record, the family is staging an intervention and Lutfi has been kept in the dark.

Um…HELLO?  Isn’t an “intervention” supposed to be a surprise thing?  It sounds like the only one surprised is Osmarmy because everybody else on the planet knows about it.  Way to keep it on the down-low, folks.

And like I said yesterday, I don’t think “intervention” is quite the correct term here…what are they going to say to her, if she doesn’t get help they’ll never speak to her again?  They barely speak to her now.  Or that they’ll withdrawal monetary support?  Um, she’s the one supporting them.  Perhaps they’ll not let her see her kids?  The court tried that, it didn’t work.  They aren’t planning an intervention…an argument, perhaps, or a strong talking-to, or a finger-waggle with a “no no no”, but not an intervention.

In other Brit news, she took delivery of a new Mercedes-Benz yesterday.  Yes, another one.  And apparently she went shopping for it in the middle of her, um, intervention:

As TMZ first reported, the family is staging an intervention so Britney can get help for her bipolar disorder. Family sources say they are furious at Lutfi, claiming he pushed Brit into going to B.H. Mercedes today to buy a new car — in the middle of the effort to save her.

And just what did she buy?  A black, two-seater, SLK 350 Mercedes-Benz, for which she paid $55,000.  Cash.  Paid in full.  What, no place for child seats?  Then she went out driving in it later that night, only to get lost and have to ask one of her pap friends to help.

That’s right, folks…all you who shelled out fifteen bucks for her CDs are co-conspirators with Osmarmy.  She used your money to buy a car that’s worth more than many people’s houses, possibly more than the houses of the very people who have supported her by buying her products.  That’s the money she uses to blow her life away, while her kids grow up with no mother.

Can I tie this very irrational decision to my theory on the effects of her menstrual cycle to her possible bipolar symptoms?

This is quite possibly the most frightening video of Brit I’ve seen yet.  I like what Michael from dlisted had to say about it:

Brit’s relationship with the paps is so f*cking strange. She’s standing there like a little girl and they are saying sh*t like “ooooh, it’s ok Britney…it’s ok…don’t be scared” while snapping away. It’s like they are petting her head and slapping her in the face at the same time.

(video language NSFW)

UPDATE:  TMZ is reporting that Brit is getting some medical help for her mental health issues, which apparently have been confirmed as bipolarity.  However, she is having the typical problem of taking her meds for a while, feeling better, and then stopping them:

Britney has seen doctors who have been referred by other doctors, plus doctors who have been referred by celebrities Britney knows, and doctors referred by her lawyers, family and friends. We’re told the process has been excruciating for her, partly because her disease is severe.

Sources tell slightly different stories about the efficacy of the medication. A friend says when Britney takes her medicine she is like “a different person — normal and sweet.” But she takes her meds for a while and then feels as if she can live without it — so she stops taking them — and her condition quickly deteriorates. But a professional tells TMZ flatly, “The medication just isn’t working.”

That same professional tells TMZ, “She’s really trying. Whether it works — we’ll have to see.” That person also says it’s extremely frustrating when the media shows video of Britney out on the town acting crazy, adding, “She has a disease. Sometimes when you see her she’s in the middle of an episode. It’s like mocking someone with Down syndrome.”

UPDATE#2:  You simply must see this video.  At some point she turns her shirt completely around and wears it backwards (you don’t see it on tape but it’s obvious).  And check out Osmarmy’s eyeroll.

WHERE IS HER MOTHER???

UPDATE #3:  According to X17 (I really hate that site, but sometimes it’s the only place to go for info, true or not), Brit has been up for over 60 hours.  It would seem this is the manic phase.

According to Janet Charlton, Hugh Hefner and one of his…um…well, Holly Madison visited a fertility clinic in hopes of continuing the Hefner bloodline:

Holly has been rhapsodizing about motherhood for the last two seasons on the show and she brings it up every chance she gets. Hef was against it at first, but eventually he started to weaken to the idea (keep in mind this would be his THIRD family) because Holly was so desperate to be a mother. Recently, Holly and Hef were seen in the waiting room of a Beverly Hills gynecologist who specializes in in vitro fertilization.

Okay.  I’m about to get controversial, so hold on to your shorts.

I’m not saying Holly shouldn’t have a chance to be a mother (although my views on celeb parenthood are pretty well-known by now…have a kid, drop out of sight for eighteen years and raise them out of the limelight so as not to screw them up too badly with the Hollyweird lifestyle coughbritneylindsayparis…you can always screw them up with your own special brand of crazazy, though, people with no money OR silicone chesticles have been doing that for years, where there’s a will there’s a way), but there are thousands of children waiting to be adopted who need good homes.  Now, I realize I’m equating “good homes” and “Playboy mansion”, but just because she’s a silicone-filled airheaded bottle-blonde poptart doesn’t mean she wouldn’t be a good mom.  And I know the adoption process can be lengthy, difficult, and expensive, but what else does she do with her days?  Put that money of Hef’s to good use for a change and adopt a child or two or three who really need good homes.

And I don’t think dad would be a hands-on type of father….I can’t see him getting up at 2 AM for diaper changes or having a mini tea party or taking Junior outside for a game of catch, so the kid might be safe from his influence.  Besides, how much longer is Hef going to be around, anyway?  She’d better be ready to be a single parent.

Listen to me.  Like any kid she comes into contact with is going to have any sort of normal upbringing.  Lesson for all you young things…one day you’ll want to reproduce, so live your life in such a way that you don’t have to run and hide the evidence when your kid asks you what you do for a living….listen to me again.  Like she would be embarrassed.  I’m going back to the real world now.

 

This whole Britney thing just gets weirder and weirder.  Let’s recap:  Last night, she had employees open Kitson at 1:30 in the morning so that she could drop $10,000 on merchandise (I was going to say that’s a lot of clothes, but when hoodies are $95, I guess that’s about one and a half shopping bags).  Four paparazzi were arrested after chasing her the other night and driving very erratically through the streets of LA.  She told police one of them tried to run her off the road, but could not identify who (so where was Anon Brazilianwax or Osama bin Loopy?  Can’t this girl afford a driver?  Or is that part of Anon’s master plan?).  And now, “sources” are saying that Brit suffers from multiple personality disorder:

We’re told the whole British accent thing — well, it’s more than an accent. Britney has multiple personalities, including, as people in her life call it, “the British girl.” We’re told when Spears loses the British personality, she has absolutely no idea what she did during the time she assumed that personality.

Sources say Brit has a number of other identities, where she becomes “the weepy girl, the diva, the incoherent girl,” and on and on.

Sources say Britney had become the British girl the day she didn’t show for her deposition and has no recollection of it.

Hmm.  I have a bit of a problem believing this one.  If she truly has no memory of the deposition, surely someone (lawyers, Anon, housekeeper, somebody) has mentioned it.  She checks the internet every day for photos of herself, so surely she’s seen pictures of herself at the courthouse and read articles about it.  And the problems in the brain that cause multiple personalities don’t just spring up overnight, they are years in the making, although a new personality can suddenly pop up with no prior warning.

However, I can also see the argument for this, as it definitely does seem at times as though we see a different Brit every day, sometimes even two or three different Brits in the course of a day.  However however, this could just be something as easily explained as PMS or hormonal swings or blood sugar imbalances.  After all, many of us wake up feeling and acting one way, but as the day goes on our behavior and actions change.  Speaking in a British accent isn’t necessarily indicative of a mental issue.  And it’s easy to cite “sources”…I can say that “sources” told me I had a McDonald’s burger for supper tonight, but that don’t necessarily make it so (I actually had mushroom and spinach pizza, although I have had a McDonald’s burger in the past, dun dun dunnnn).  But but again…when one pieces together the events of the past year or so in Brit’s life, one does come to realize that she definitely has a mental disorder of some kind.

I know that some will say that Britney is perfectly sane and that this is all a ruse to get people to either feel sorry for her, or for her to emotionally manipulate the masses.  However, I don’t agree with that one…while I do think that she sometimes does work the media to her advantage or to pull what she considers a joke on the public (as is now believed to be behind the pregnancy test purchase the other day), I truly do believe that she is mentally ill.  Even she should know, in her right mind, that being taken away strapped to a gurney wouldn’t be helpful to her child custody case.

Let’s just stop for a minute and say that this multiple personality thing is true.  IF it is so, then that means Anon, Osmarma bin Loopy, Cuzin Alli, her parents, her family, are all letting her go on and on without stopping her or attempting to get her help…especially those who are closest to her on a daily basis, which at this point are Anon and Smarmy, who appear to be the wall (either known or unknown to Brit) between she and her family.  If Anon is making zexytime with her, while refusing to get her help and at the same time selling his “exclusive” pics to Finalpixx, that’s reprehensible beyond belief.  I realize that having an adult committed to a mental facility is a tortuous, difficult, and arduous process, but somebody needs to attempt it before this girl self-destructs.

So, Mythbusters, let’s mark this one as plausible, but not practical.  In other words, I need more information.

And how close is she to hopping that train to Anna Nicoleville?  The Associated Press already has an obituary ready to go, a distinction usually reserved for the sick and aged.  Well, they got the sick part right.

UPDATE:  Uh, yeah, I’d say Brit definitely is not pregnant.  That, or she doesn’t have very good aim with the ketchup.  You can see the pictures here.  (warning…NSFW and rather gross)