Most people may remember John Stamos as Jesse Katsopolis aka Uncle Jesse in the 80’s/90’s TV sitcom Full House. Even fewer people might remember John’s short two-year stint as Blackie Parrish on the soap opera General Hospital. That two year gig was all it took to get the gals interested in Stamos, and he remains a long time heart throb for many.

Full House ran for EIGHT years, (never liked that theme song) with a myriad of actors. They started out with Joey, Jesse, Danny, DJ, Stephanie, Michelle and Comet the Dog.  Later on, many new cast members joined the crew, including  a wife and kids for Uncle Jesse.

To me, this is where Full House took John Stamos’ hunky bad boy image and turned his character into a boring married family man/Elvis lover with twins boys and a sickeningly sweet wife.

Fortunately for fans of John, who stars on ER now as paramedic turned intern, Tony Gates, has finally gotten his sexy back (after a long hiatus). Mercy! As Uncle Jesse used to say.

Has Stamos Found The Fountain Of Youth?

Of course, in his defense, when John was on Full House, he had very TWO very nerdy side kicks which helped to bring Stamos’ hot bad boy image to a screeching halt. Bob Saget and Dave Coulier, aren’t exactly good wing men for looking cool — no disrespect boys.

So what’s John/Jesse up to now? Trying to bring a Full House movie to the big screen apparently.US Magazine writes:

The Tanner family: coming to a big screen near you? John Stamos who played Uncle Jesse on the show from 1987 to 1995, says he’s “working on a movie idea.” Don’t expect Mary-Kate, Ashley Olsen and the original gang back, though.

“It wouldn’t be us playing us,” Stamos tells New York’s Daily News. “I’m not 100 percent sure, but it would probably take place in the first few years [of the sitcom].”

Stamos, who has since starred on ER, has a few actors in mind to play the lead roles. James Franco would be perfect as Uncle Jesse, he says.

“I see Steve Carell as Danny Tanner (originally played by Bob Saget) and Tracy Morgan as Joey Gladstone (originated by Dave Coulier) because he’s funny,” Stamos continues.

And just because recasting the movie doesn’t mean Stamos (a spokesperson for Project Cuddle, a charity to prevent infants from being abandoned) isn’t tight with his former costars.

“We’re all very close,” he said. “I saw Ashley [Olsen] a couple weeks ago. Bob and Dave, I see a lot.”

Many kudos for John and other stars with their involvement with Project Cuddle. Statistics show that 57 babies are abandoned every day. A noble cause by a noble guy.

Now I dont know if John’s picks are the best choices for this movie. Steve Carrell as Danny Tanner? And Tracy Morgan as Joey? I am sure he was joking? I hope he was joking. Nothing against Carrell and Morgan, but I don’t think they fit the parts very well. Unless of course this is to be a spoof movie remake of Full House, which may be kind of hilarious. John are you listening?

Then again, who could of thought that Mall Cop would have banked what it did? Love Kevin James, but Mall Cop sounded like an epic failure waiting to happen.

So with that in mind, maybe John may be laughing all the way to the bank in the near future. He is slated to be awarded a star on the “Hollywood Walk Of Fame” sometime in 2009. This past March he said he will be cast in the upcoming Broadway revival of Bye Bye Birdie. I think he will be perfect for the part of Conrad Birdie and do a great job with that part!

Rock On Jesse!

So where is the rest of the Full House cast today?

Candace Cameron (sister of bible thumper Kirk Cameron) who played older sister DJ, also a bible thumper, is married to a retired hockey player, Valeri Bure, has three kids and writes a monthly column called Christian Women Online. Lovely!

Jodi Sweetin and Candace Cameron All Growed Up

What about middle child Stephanie, played by Jodie Sweetin? Sweetin, did some TV work here and there over the years, but has had a rough time of it in last few years, and we mean ROUGH. Married twice, first to a cop, and then to a film transportation coordinator. Not surprisingly, her second marriage was very short ending in divorce this past year, with LOTS of tabloid drama. Jodi has one daughter, Zoie Laurel May.

I was both shocked and saddened, when I heard that Jodie is currently writing a memoir, which will chronicle her downward spiral of alcohol and drug abuse that began with the ending of Full House. The book title is unSweetined and is due out in bookstores October 6, 2009.

Hollywood can be a cruel place for a kid and Jodi’s no exception.

Jodi is an only child and was adopted. Unfortunately, her biological family has had a history of drug addictions and as the tabloids have shown, the curse didn’t skip her. We wish Jodie much success with her book and continued hope with fighting her addiction. It’s never easy

We mustn’t forget the baby of the family, Michelle, who was played by TWO actors: the Olsen twins. You know the freakin’ Olsen twins, Mary Kate and Ashley!

The Olsen twins at NINE MONTHS OLD, both played Michelle (due to strict labor laws). The audience had no idea for years that twins were playing one roll. For the first year, Ashley would cry when she was brought on set to do a scene, so Mary-Kate had more screen time in the first season. Hmmmm, early sibling rivalry perhaps?

Is it just me or did others think the Olsen twins were NOT cute?  Sorry, but I always thought the Olsen twins as babies and even as toddlers were the perfect example that all babies are NOT beautiful. They were plenty talented, having to remember all those lines and to act on top of it at such a young age, but cute? Not so much. But honestly…what happened to that talent? 

Hollywood happened. It’s been known to kill a few brain cells to say the least. These days, the twins are uber-millionaires with an estimated worth of over $100 million dollars. They have their royalties, their clothing line (though they are NOT liked by Peta for wearing fur) and of course, their endless stream of repetitive, direct to DVD movies, once popular with the young girls. You will have to forgive me, but I can’t stand them.

Who would have thought that playing Michelle would have led to years of watching the Olsen twins strike that sickening pose that they always do? What is that thing they do with their lips? It makes me retch. I was SO tired of seeing their faces plastered on every rag in town. I have checked tons of pictures and with the exception of only a couple, they ALWAYS pose with Mary Kate on on the right.

At least the Olsen frenzy has finally and thankfully calmed down in the last couple of years. I was tired of hearing about Mary Kate’s fight with anorexia, and seeing her bony 80 pound scrawny butt. Damn, eat a sandwich girl!

Still wondering what the deal was with Mary Kate and Heath Ledger —  she was called twice before 911 was called. Somethin’ seemed kinda fishy to me there. Still does, but I guess mother justice has different rules for celebs.

PLEASE! Come Up With a New Pose!

The Olsen twins just tuned 23, and my guess is that they have no intention of being involved in this Full House project, especially since they didn’t even attend Bob Saget’s roast. Maybe they had to wash each other’s hair.

What about Bob?

Bob Saget who played widower Danny Tanner, the patriarch on Full House, is also known for his seven year stint on America’s Funniest Home Videos.  Saget was roasted on Comedy Cental Roast  just last year, where most of the Full House cast showed up except Candace (probably to racy for her), Mary Kate and Ashley (it wasn’t about them). 

Simply Hilarious

Saget has done cameos here and there on TV sitcoms, had lent his voice to many films and looks like he has a pilot in the works for A&E.

Saget’s webpage was NOT what I expected. That All-American Dad persona that he has been labeled with over the years, seems to be out the door now. His website has a black and white edgy look. He stands as a darkened silhouette, smoking a cigarette with the rap song “Rollin’ With Saget” playing. This song, done by fellow pranksters Jamie Kennedy and Stue Stone back in 2005 is not only hysterical, but features Saget himself.

They sing Saget is The Illest Mother F*cker in a Cardigan Sweater, and even funnier…at the end of the song Saget says “Goodnight Michelle.” There was a video actually made where John Stamos appears in it here and there, which I found on Dumb.com .
Although most of the lyrics are bleeped out in this version, you can still get the gist of it. Don’t bother looking for it on YouTube…Viacom squashed all the music all on the vids due to copyright.

And then there’s Joey (aka Uncle Joey)

Dave Coulier, (Alanis Morissette’s ex – and possible object of ire in “You Outta Know”) played Joey Gladstone on Full House. Dave is has stared on the “Surreal World” reality show in the past, and is the voice of Bob McKenzie on the Canadian animated series Bob and Doug. He is a long time impressionist and comedian and has hosted a variety of shows and has done voice overs for many films over the years. Just seems like a hell of a nice guy (unless of course, your name is Alanis).

On The Set Of Full House

We’ll keep all you Full House fans posted on any new developments.

Mary-Kate Olsen is off the hook for now.  It seems that the investigation into how Heath Ledger obtained the cocktail of drugs found in his system after his death is closed:

Prosecutors in the U.S. attorney’s office in Manhattan had been overseeing a Drug Enforcement Administration probe into whether the painkillers found in Ledger’s system were obtained illegally. But the prosecutors have bowed out “because they don’t believe there’s a viable target,” said the official, who spoke on condition of anonymity because no charges have been filed.

The decision comes after recent reports that actress Mary-Kate Olsen was demanding immunity before answering questions about the startling death of her close friend and his drug use. Authorities say she was the first person called by a masseuse who found the 28-year-old “Dark Knight” actor’s lifeless body in his Manhattan apartment.

The DEA had obtained a subpoena that could have forced Olsen if she continued to hold out. But the subpoena, issued in April, is no longer valid because it was contingent upon prosecutors pursuing the case, the official said Wednesday. The official added that the case could still be revived if evidence of a crime emerges.

They were investigating what he had in his system, why it was there, and how he obtained it to start with:

DEA investigators suspect the painkillers found in Ledger’s system, oxycodone and hydrocodone, were obtained with phony prescriptions or other illegal means. Oxycodone is sold as OxyContin and hydrocodone as Vicodin. [...]

Other drugs taken by Ledger, including anti-anxiety medication and sleeping pills, were prescribed legally by doctors in California and Texas.

Mary-Kate has insisted she does not now how Heath obtained the drugs.

I don’t know.  If I was a friend of someone who died in this manner, and if I were the first person called after the death, and if I had nothing to hide, speaking to the police about it would not be a problem.  But, while perhaps she didn’t have anything to do with the drugs found in his system, maybe it’s her own, unrelated activities that night which the police would have found suspicious…maybe she was covering her own skinny butt, but not in the way we think.

In any case, the investigation is closed unless they find something which pries it open again.  This death did not have to happen.  Please, people, pay attention to what you’re doing, and keep a network of people around you if you’re having problems.

Mary-Kate Olsen, whose name has been repeatedly linked to the tragic death of Heath Ledger because of some phone calls which were made to her number upon Heath’s body being discovered by his massage therapist and housekeeper, has issued a statement on Ledger’s death:

“Heath was a friend. His death is a tragic loss. My thoughts are with his family during this very difficult time.”

I don’t know why, meaning it’s an instinctual feeling rather than one based on facts, but this statement falls short on what I’d expect from someone who was clearly closely involved with Heath’s life. So involved that her number was called four times within the first 15 minutes of discovering Heath had passed away. I am not impugning anyone’s reputation, least of all Heath’s, but Mary-Kate really should have said NOTHING, than the above cold, calculated response.

Spare me. Your thoughts are NOT with his family. Your thoughts are with your ever-increasing suspicious name being associated with the death of a clearly beloved figure.

Sometimes it’s better to say nothing. I don’t care what you think Mary Kate, I just want to know why you didn’t tell that masseuse person to call 911 immediately.

I will stop myself from saying more, but suffice it to say, words like selfish, little, troll come to mind. Ok, that’s enough of that.

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen have announced their own “Battle Of The Bands.” What does this mean? Well, let’s let the girls speak for themselves, according to a March 22 post:

“…tell all your musician friends (only unsigned bands or independent recording artists can qualify–no major label acts) to come here to this blog and leave comments telling us about their music. That’s ultimately how you’ll be able to enter to qualify as one of our 10 finalists in the final BATTLE OF THE BANDS play-off. Leave us a comment here on the blog, leave us a link to your web page or MySpace page (wherever we can listen to your music), and then you’re in for your chance to be in the Top 10…Online voting for the BATTLE OF THE BANDS will begin here, at mary-kateandashley.com, April 9th.”

And then on March 28th, Mary Kate posted this update:

“Hey everyone. It’s Mary-Kate. So, the Battle of the Bands contest is going to be amazing. I’m really excited about all of the interest and feedback we’ve been receiving for this contest. We’ve listened to your music, and we can’t wait to narrow all of the entries down to our final Top 10 (we’ve already got a few favorites in mind). We’ll post the Top 10 Finalists here on mary-kateandashley.com, starting April 9th…”

I’m still not entirely sure what any of this means, but one interesting thing I found were the twins listing their favorite bands of late as Pearl Jam, Crosby, Stills & Nash (what no Young?), The Doors, Radiohead, Razorlight, Cream, Bob Dylan.

What’s up with all the classic-rock/blues-roots stuff? What are they like 50-year-hippies? Actually, come to think of it, they dress like a bunch of granola-munchers. The only thing missing on that list is the Grateful Dead and they would officially qualify as the perfect girlfriend for my ex. Cripes, that’s not a good thing.

So stay tuned for more cryptic Battle of The Band news from the Olsen twins. I guess.