Well, not sure if everyone in America wants to be a Pepper, but Dr Pepper sure wants to see Axl Rose release the long-awaited (and awaited and awaited) “Chinese Democracy” this year…so much so that the soft drink giant is offering a free can of Dr Pepper to every man, woman, and child in America (excluding Slash and Buckethead) if Axl releases his album in 2008:

Many have tried, but so far nobody has been able to pry the decade-in-the-works Guns N’ Roses album “Chinese Democracy” from the hands of lone remaining original member Axl Rose.

Now, Dr Pepper thinks it’s up to the challenge. The soft drink company says it will give a free can of Dr Pepper to “everyone in America” (excluding ex-Guns members Slash and Buckethead) if “Chinese Democracy” arrives anytime during the calendar year 2008. […]

“Chinese Democracy” was most recently scheduled for release in March 2007, but promptly vanished from the schedule without a new date being set. Rose said at the time that all the recording had been completed, but there were some “scheduling difficulties.”

It will be the first album of fresh Guns N’ Roses material since the 1991 sets “Use Your Illusion I” and “Use Your Illusion II.” Rose has reportedly burned through $13 million in recording expenses for “Chinese Democracy,” and also burned his bridges with the bandmates who helped him turn Guns into one of the biggest rock groups in the world by the early 1990s.

Now there’s motivation if I ever saw it!

Axl, for his part, doesn’t seem to be as thirsty as other people are:

We are surprised and very happy to have the support of Dr Pepper with our album “Chinese Democracy,” as for us, this came totally out of the blue. If there is any involvement with this promotion by our record company or others, we are unaware of such at this time. And as some of Buckethead’s performances are on our album, I’ll share my Dr Pepper with him.

Could somebody please fetch the diva a manicurist, I think he has a hangnail and it’s making him a cranky-pants.

Here’s a thought…why not just have Axl buy us all a Dr Pepper and skip the album release altogether.  It isn’t like G&R are, oh, what’s the word I’m looking for…relevant? Did it suddenly become 1987 again when I wasn’t looking? I stopped caring about G&R (outside of “Sweet Child o’ Mine”) about the time I stopped bleaching my hair like Cyndi Lauper’s. (don’t ask)

Besides, it looks like Miss Thang has been spending a little too much time with Mr. Plastic Surgeon and Miss Hair Oh-No-You-Dinnt. I mean, look at the guy. What happened?

Scuze me. I need to step out to the corner mart for a moment.

I drink Dr Pepper, don’t you know
It’s the original taste that I love so
And the taste is making Peppers
Everywhere I go…

I’m a Pepper
He’s a Pepper
She’s a Pepper
We’re a Pepper
Wouldn’t you like to be a Pepper, too?

Be a Pepper, drink Dr Pepper…

Dear Santa:

I just wanted you to know that I’ve been very, very, very good this year and I have not been bad at all…at least, not so’s you’d notice.  I can explain about that time I hollered at that old grandma in Wal-Mart.  And there’s a perfectly good reason why I tailgated that guy on my way to church this week.  And I swear, I didn’t mean to be so nasty when that teenager working at Taco Bell forgot my chili cheese burrito.  There is a perfectly good explanation for all of this.

I’m just a wee bit crazy.

So, if you can overlook that, and realize that I really am trying, and that I have a good heart (that I’d like to get healthier), then you can understand why this is all I am asking for this year as my Christmas present.  You see, my badonkadonk has a bit more kadonk that I like, and I want to get it in shape.  But who has time, now that I am writing for GlossLip?  I barely have time to work in my three-hour daily nap, my afternoon carb overload, and my midnight Moon Pie odyssey, let alone find a chance to get on the treadmill.  This could solve all my problems.  Yes, I do need to learn how to type and walk at the same time, but I recently mastered the art of walking and thinking about where I am going, so I am pretty sure I can do it.

I know it is going to run about $6500 USD, but think of the joy you’ll give me when I find this under the Christmas tree.  And I promise, if you bring me one, I won’t write that piece about you and those suspicious “reindeer games”.  Hey, I can understand how these things happen, but I’m just sayin’, that’s all.  You forgot the numero uno rule of celebrityism…never record in any way what you don’t want to come back to haunt you.

Have a nice Christmas.  I’ll try to remember not to eat all the chocolate chip cookies and to leave you a couple.

kthxbai
k

(Note:  I have no idea what brand of lipstick Christina, Gwen, or Dita use, I just chose them because in these photos their lipstick color is red.)

The FDA today said they would look into claims from an advocacy group that says certain shades of red lipstick made in the USA have potentially harmful levels of lead:

The Campaign for Safe Cosmetics said that a third of the 33 red lipsticks examined by an independent lab contained a level of lead exceeding 0.1 parts per million — which is the FDA’s limit for lead in candy. The FDA does not set a limit for lead in lipstick.

The organization commissioning the lipstick study says its goal is to pressure companies to remove toxic chemicals from their products and replace them with safer alternatives. The lead tests were conducted by an independent laboratory last month on red lipsticks bought in Boston, San Francisco, Minneapolis and Hartford, Conn., the organization said.

According to the Campaign For Safe Cosmetics:

More than half of 33 brand-name lipsticks tested (61 percent) contained detectable levels of lead, with levels ranging from 0.03 to 0.65 parts per million (ppm). None of these lipsticks listed lead as an ingredient.
One-third of the tested lipsticks exceeded the U.S. Food and Drug Administration’s 0.1 ppm limit for lead in candy – a standard established to protect children from directly ingesting lead. Lipstick products, like candy, are directly ingested into the body. Nevertheless, the FDA has not set a limit for lead in lipstick, which fits with the disturbing absence of FDA regulatory oversight and enforcement capacity for the $50 billion personal care products industry. […]

Among the top brands testing positive for lead were:
-L’Oreal Colour Riche “True Red” – 0.65 ppm
-L’Oreal Colour Riche “Classic Wine” – 0.58 ppm
-Cover Girl Incredifull Lipcolor “Maximum Red” – 0.56 ppm
-Dior Addict “Positive Red” – 0.21 ppm

Lead is a proven neurotoxin that can cause learning disabilities in children, can be the cause of lowered IQ and language problems, and can also cause behavioral problems such as increased aggression.  Small children and pregnant women are most at risk; lead easily crosses the placenta and enters the fetal brain.  It also has been linked to infertility and miscarriage.

While there is a certain amount of lead naturally present in some ingredients used to make lipsticks, most in the cosmetic industry say it is not intentionally added.  And a group representing the cosmetic industry says that the amount of lead present in makeup is negligible, anyway:

The trade association representing the cosmetic industry acknowledged “negligible” levels of lead in some lipsticks, but said it is not intentionally added.

“Consumers are exposed daily to lead when they eat, drink water and breathe the air,” said John Bailey, an executive vice president at the Cosmetic, Toiletry and Fragrance Association. “The average amount of lead a woman would be exposed to when using cosmetics is 1,000 times less than the amount she would get from eating, breathing, and drinking water that meets Environmental Protection Agency drinking water standards.”

Does it never end?  Our pets are poisoned, our fruits and vegetables are tainted, the toys we buy our preschoolers are toxic, and now we can’t wear lipstick without worrying that we’re endangering our health.  I don’t wear red red lipstick, but it’s worrisome just the same.  Most lip colors are just some shade of red, anyway…pink, brown, violet, coral, all shades of red.  I don’t think there is a need to get hysterical about this, but it should make us stop and think about the products we use on our faces and bodies, and perhaps push for them to be more stringently regulated.

A historical note:  Some scholars say that Queen Elizabeth I was slowly poisoned by the lead in her makeup, called ceruse…a mixture of white lead and vinegar.  We have come a long way since Elizabethan times….I think.

You can download the entire report including names of all test subjects and their performance here.

We here at Glosslip aren’t just satisfied with bringing you the latest in celebrity news - we have other skillz too!  Our resident ninja-stylist and fashionista, D-Bomb (witness protection program assignment) will be bringing you weekly tips on the best styling products, fashion trends and tips to overall enhance you life.  If it’s hot, she already has the third-degree-burns to prove it.  And she whips up a mean mojito. 

So unless you want your hair to look like Britney Spears scabby-beat-ass-weave you better listen up!

But wait, there’s more…