Verne Troyer, aka Mini Me of Austin Powers movie fame, has just been slapped with a temporary restraining order from model Yvette Monet. We will get to that later.

I don’t know much about Verne Troyer.
With the exception of his performance as Mini Me (which I really enjoyed), and his previous appearance on the Surreal Life reality show… I just didn’t know anything more about him.

His appearance on Surreal Life gave me a tiny (no pun intended) look into Verne’s true personality, which kind of disappointed me. From his drunken naked romp on his scooter and peeing on the floor, to the very strange noises he was making after ”Peter Brady” aka Christopher Knight carried Verne back to Verne’s room and had to put him back in his bed. That scene is forever etched in my brain. Ewww. I also found Verne kind of bratty.

So I did a little digging on Verne, and became even more dissapointed. I was a little shocked to find there had been a sex tape leaked involving Verne and former girlfriend, Ranae Shrider  last year. (Verne is suing TMZ for twenty million for showing the tape)

Then there was the love triangle between Verne, Jason “Wee Man” Acuna,(Jackass fame) with Dominique Arganese. I guess some gals love the tiny ones.

Of course there was also Verne’s previous marriage to former Playboy centerfold Genevieve Gallen back in 2004, which lasted all of an entire month. Verne and Genevieve met at a New Years party at Heff’s Playboy mansion in LA. 

Genevieve, Verne and Heff

Genevieve had quite a bit to say (way too much) about her crazy month with Verne. She talked about them getting their sexy on ten times a day and some “sessions” lasting for up to 45 mins a pop. (Sting still has him beat)  She also said they did role playing, and wore costumes. Thanks SO much for that vision Genevieve.

Ok well fine. Nothing earth shattering there, except for the number of times he was able to perform. Which would put most men to shame, and make most women run and hide.

Just because Verne is only 2′ 8″ tall, didn’t mean he couldn’t get his freak on with Genevieve who is 5″ 6″. But I know what all of you are thinking… how did they do it? And er…. does Verne tuck it in his sock? Right? Don’t lie!

Well thanks to Genevieve, she let everyone know by stating this about Verne’s package (or lack there of) and how their love making was achieved:

“We had to be creative – but because of my yoga experience I could get into the right positions to make it work.”

“But I was surprised when I saw him naked for the first time that night-I had expected him to be better endowed. Verne’s body is proportional all over, so he was smaller than I expected.”

“He was a sex addict. He was then only the second man I’d ever slept with. He told me he’d had huge numbers of girls.”

“I had even researched what condoms to use for a little man,”

“With Verne I started experimenting with my own pleasure in ways I had never done before,” says Genevieve.“

Ok ewww… TMI on the that last quote there.
So I guess Verne is quite the little horn dog.

But wow Genevieve, not to pull a dumb blonde stereotype on you… but you were actually surprised that Verne wasn’t more well endowed? Did you really think you would be getting a Milton Berle? (Uncle Miltie was hung like a horse) Or did you think Verne was built like a chinchilla? FYI….chinchillas have unusually enormous schlongs for such a tiny varmint.
I wonder if Verne calls his winky “Mini Me“? Sorry, I couldn’t resist.

And Genevieve claimed that Verne was only the second man she ever slept with? Apparently, Genevieve thinks everyone has just fallen off the turnip truck.

All that aside… Verne appears to be pretty hot with the ladies and there has been no shortage of blondes for him to frolic with. But Verne does seem to have a huge demon. That demon is alcohol.

Genevieve claims that he used to drink a litre of vodka and a 12-pack of Budweiser in a single day.

Yikes! That’s an awful lot of libation for someone shorter than a yardstick. That amount of liquor would do a number on anyone’s liver among other things, never mind his teeny tiny liver. It doesn’t sound physcially possible for Verne to ingest that much hootch. But I guess anything is possible. I just don’t put too much faith behind what Genevieve has said, even though I have seen evidence of Verne crawling into the bottle and being sloppy drunk on more than one occassion.

There are many vids here and there of Verne feeling no pain. Just take a look on Youtube and the internet. One shows him falling over drunk on the ground near his limo, and another of him ramming his scooter into a door. There are videos of drunken conversations with people and let’s not forget the previously mentioned “peeing episode” on Surreal Life.

Vern’s drinking must not only be reeking havoc with his body, but also with his relationships.

More from Genevieve:

“At the end of the day, I think he was more in love with alcohol than he was with me.”

“Soon after I met him he almost drank himself to death. I heard he was in hospital and when I got there he was lying in bed covered in vomit and diarrhoea,” says Genevieve.

“Then there was a time when I got home and found myself locked out. I tried to wake Verne by banging on the door but he’d drunk so much I couldn’t. The neighbours called the police and I convinced them to break the door open to let me in.

“When I found him, he was face down clutching a pillow. I tried to wake him but it was impossible, so I had to pick him up still clutching the pillow and take him outside to present him to the police officers.

“They were shining the light on his head and Verne was mumbling, ‘What’s going on?” One of the police officers started laughing but the other one told him to stop. It was really embarrassing.”

Yikes, Verne what are you doing to yourself?

And now, with this latest development with former gal pal Yvette Monet, Verne had better get his sh*t together.

Yvette Monet is an ex St. Paul beauty queen and model. Of course.
According to The Hollywood Gossip:

Gorgeous model Yvette Monet has requested and been granted a temporary restraining order granted against her unstable former boyfriend … Verne Troyer.

Monet says she used to date Troyer but that they broke up months ago. She states that she believes he owns a gun and that she currently fears for her life.

Yvette says Troyer constantly texts and emails her despite her many requests for him to stop, and that he has sent threats telling her to “watch herself.”

She says Troyer has told her that his friend Burt has a gun and will do anything he says and that he has a cop friend called Jose who also has guns.
Has Verne Troyer really been making threats against his former girlfriend, Yvette Monet? On an unrelated note, was Verne Troyer really dating Yvette Monet?

She requested that Troyer be asked to stay away from her, her workplace, her home and her vehicle. The restraining order will remain in effect until December 2.

A Minnesota native, Yvette is a former beauty queen hailing from St. Paul. She was a spokes model for Merle Norman Cosmetics and has also modeled for Miller Lite.

She has also appeared on eight different television shows.

The 2′8″ Troyer has appeared in the Austin Powers franchise and also appeared in The Surreal Life. He is perhaps as well known for the Verne Troyer sex tape featuring him giving it to another ex-girlfriend, Renae Shrider, last year.

Verne was also seen around London this past February with former UK Big Brother contestant, Chanelle Hayes according to Hollywood Gossip. But who knows if they were actually dating? Maybe she was she trying to land herself a role in the upcoming Austin Powers sequel? I guess we will have to wait and see if Channelle turns up as Fembot.

Chanelle Hayes

Is it my imagination? Or do all these gold diggers look alike?

Gee Verne. A few words of advice….
I think your “mini me” can use a rest. Lose the blondes for a while, and kick that bottle to the curb.

Concentrate on finding yourself, and find yourself some good rehab. (be sure it’s not Scientology or Narconon which are two in the same)

You need to focus on keeping your career on track, especially with the new Austin Powers sequel coming up. Nip all this mess in the bud before you are known as another “high risk” actor. (hello Lohan and the Hoff)

Hopefully you will meet someone who is right for you, and not some gold digging bimbo.They may look pretty on your arm, but what are their true intentions? Unless of course you just don’t care.

As much as digging into Verne’s personal life has really made me cringe, with his sex-capades and his drunken episodes caught on video, I still am rooting for Verne to turn himself around. I don’t know why.

Maybe it’s because I really enjoyed him as Mini Me, or the fact that he can fit in my suitcase. Or maybe it was that little mention of him being able to go ten times a day.

Does anyone have his number?  *SNICKER and EWWWW*

Hey! Now Put That Away Verne!

It’s hump day and what’s been going on in the world of celebrity gossip lately?
Same old crap and some new crap.

Lindsey Lohan went to court and partied the night before and the night after her court hearing. Yawn!
But wait… she said she’s afraid her Dad may kidnap her now. Uh.. again yawn. Wake me up when she does something new.

What’s also up?
Not Balloon Boy!  That news is SO rampant, that I am already tired of it. But it looks like reality has caught up with the Heenes. Honestly, I caught these loons on Wife Swap a while back and the father was a hot headed, delusional wacko, who thinks the sun rises and sets by him. I thought this man was questionable way back then, but you can’t always tell, with the way “reality” shows edit their shows. But now we know for sure. Yep! My gut instinct was totally spot on.

Now I think his wife is either abused and doesn’t know enough to get away and agrees with everything her idiot husband does regardless, or she actually agrees with everything her hubby does and also thinks you should raise your children by dragging them to twister romps and pulling them out of school and allowing them to trash talk to whomever they want. Either scenario is SAD. 
Oh! Have you seen their video on YouTube? I can’t understand what the hell they are singing about, but it looks pretty darn questionable. Future Beastie Boys ya think?

I wonder if wifey-poo will throw hubby under the bus, when it comes down to their day in court? Get out the popcorn! And as far as reality fame goes? Heenes… you got it now! Yah happy?

And more people who get under my skin…
Elisabeth Hasselbeck is back on The View. (oh joy) 
I guess little Ms. Perfect sent out some not so perfect baby pictures of her baby AND a guest appearance of her nipple to her friends and family by mistake. HA HA HA! This story brought me so much joy.

On to other idiots…
Rod Blagojevich (again NOT a celebrity), WILL appear on Celebrity Apprentice, yet another reason not to watch Trump’s show ever again.

And even more idiots…
Stephanie Pratt was busted for DUI. I wonder what bible thumper sista -in-law Heidi Montag will have to say about this? Maybe Heidi can get Stephen Baldwin to baptize Stephanie for her. ‘Cause we all know just how beneficial it was for Heidi. Praise Jesus!

And on to the King  and Queen of idiots…
Jon Gosselin is still hated by the majority of America. Well wait a minute…I stand corrected. Octomom, Nadya Suleman told Radar Online she thought Jon Gosselin was hot and has a crush on him. Ummm… hot?Perhaps Nadya needs her eyes checked and should pick up a paper every once in a while. Oh that’s right, she has 14 children, who has time?

But sorry Octomon, Jon was too busy getting his sexy on in a fancy cab with gal pal Hailey Glassman.
Hey Jon, you sure you want to pass this up? Could be a new show fer yah!
How about “John +Nadya +14+ 8 = The Earth Spinning Off It’s Axis”?

Well not if TLC has anything to say about it! They are already suing Jon for breech of contract, of course.
And he also has been ordered to pay back $180,00.00 back to his account with Kate. Kate ALSO has been ordered to pay some money back too. Seems like Karma has been rearing it’s ugly head with those two.

And speaking of Octomom, the Doc that implanted the SIX embryos (one split into two) into Octomom has been booted from the practice where he was employed for not following the rules. But of course he is still allowed to practice. Who knows what he will do now that he is on his own. I smell another reality show?
I can hear the promo now…
“Meet Dr. Eggo! He’s serving them sunny side up, so you too can have your very own reality show and start exploiting your very own litter of children in no time! Hey! Let Go Of My Eggo!”

Seriously, have you seen the latest clip of Octomon and her brood with all those kids crying? It makes me want to pull my hair out.

Speaking of child exploitation, Kate Gosselin tells Vanity Fair she ”feels like a prisoner” of her own fame and that the kids are starting to act out. STARTING to act out? Wow, if seeing Maddy in previous shows was only the start of her bitchdom, I woudn’t want to see her now. That child is not a force to be reckoned with! And please Kate…  let me get out the violin….you were being interviewed by VANITY FAIR and getting paid for it. Prisoner my ass!

On to more phony things….
Miss California, Carrie Prejean is being sued for her her boobs! K2 Productions (which directs the California USA pageant ) is asking Carrie for $5,200 back. I guess they paid for her boob job. K2 says it’s not about the money, and the money will go to charity. I doubt if will want the implants back. *snicker*

Speaking of cash….
Nicholas Cage is in a heap of debt. Cage is suing his former manager Samuel Levin for $20 million. Levin allegedly screwed with Cage’s money and Cage says that his manager is the one responsible for his current debt headache. Word of advice Nick…. don’t wait seven years before you check up on hired help that handles all your dough.

And on to big sloppy messes…
Anna Nicole Smith is back in the news again. Well, the court case of her doctors and Howard Stern that is.
In court, Larry Birkhead told a scathing account of Anna’s drug use while she was pregnant. 

Maurice Brighthaupt, former bodyguard of Anna, claims he saw Howard Stern, and Dr. Eroshevich injecting Anna with needles. He also said he saw Anna injecting herself. Why did this guy wait so long with this information? Supposedly Dr. Eroshevich was the bodyguard’s friend, as well as Stern. Sorry! No excuse.

Supposedly Anna Nicole was drinking pedialyte out of a baby bottle and laying in her own feces when found. Why was she ever brought to Florida in this condition? Now I know Anna was a complete mess with drugs, but when someone is that addicted to drugs and that incapacitated, she should have received help from the people around her, especially her doctors and those closest to her. Not checking into a Florida hotel. Stern was not present at her death, he was busy seeing a man about boat.

The IRS is also in play with Anna Nicole these days, and have filed a $125,112.86 tax lien on the estate of Vickie Lynn Marshall. So much for resting in Peace. Geez, what a mess.

And some weirdness in the news…
Marge Simpson is on the cover of Playboy’s October issue. Sorry, I didn’t find it at all amusing and I refuse to show a picture of it.
In fact I poo poo Playboy for advertising the Simpsons.

Nancy Cartwright, the voice of Bart Simpson, Scientologist extraordinaire, donated TEN MILLLION DOLLARS to Scientology in May of 2008. Anyone that supports the Simpsons in any way is inadvertently giving money to Scientology down the line. Why would Cartwright give the money to her children, when she would rather hand it over to Scientology? Gotta keep everything KSW! (Keep Scientology Working) Right Nancy? Hope she wakes up some day.

Speaking of naughty pictures.
Levi Johnston (former husband of Bristol Palin) will be posing for Playgirl and has been in the gym bulking up for his upcoming saucy shots. I also caught him on a commercial for Wonderful Pistachio nuts. Yes, the man who will soon be showing his nuts was hawking nuts on TV. The commercial shows him with an immense bodyguard and Levi is eating a few nuts and the tag line says “Now Levi Johnston does it with protection”
I kid you not. See the commercial for yourself!
Wow! Talking about pissing Palin off! Yeehaw!

But wait it gets better….
Levi was interviewed by Vanity Fair. The name of the article is “Me and Mrs. Palin”.

Levi dishes about Palin and her lack of parenting, her bad moods, Todd flipping out and Levi was quoted as saying,

“I thought, Was this woman—who, at home, would literally say things that did not make sense—really running for vice president?”

You go Levi! I have a new respect for the boy. *snicker*

Then we move on to more puzzling things…
The court case of John Travolta.
Readers are probably wondering why I haven’t reported on this case as of yet. The testimonies in the court case were changing on a such a daily basis with so much “he said/she said” garbage going on, and with changing stories, that if I wrote about what was happening as it happened, I would have had to edit the story every single day.

I will be covering this story when and if I feel that some sort of conclusion of sorts has been made. I will say that this case has been one big puzzle of unanswered questions on BOTH sides.

And speaking of The Travoltas moving on …
Both Kelly and John attended the IAS (International Association of Scientologists)
Scientology 25th Anniversary at Scientology’s St. Hill Org in England.
Sadly, it looks like John will not be leaving this cult any time soon.

Tom Cruise, Katie and Suri were also in attendance. Poor Katie and Suri.

Scientology wanted people to believe that 4,000 people were in attendance at their event. ROTFL!
That number is just classic Scientology spin in which they are so famous for. They usually have to fly and bus tons of people in, as well as dressing up their Sea Orgers members to fill in the seats so it will look full. Reason for this? So their IAS PR photo will look like they are still successful to their members. It’s an old smoke and mirrors trick of Scientology, so they can continue to deceive their members. Lovely, isn’t it?

The IAS is nothing more than members donating money to Scientology. (which the majority goes straight to cult leader David Miscavige) In return for their donation, they get a discount on courses, auditing and such. Which is not a discount at all since they are donating money. Duh!

Cruise and Travoilta have donated millions and millions of dolllars to Scientology. Exactly what Scientology does with all that money as fas as “helping” to “clear the planet”  is a mystery. The money goes to buy more buildings that stand idle, make Miscavige richer and pay for all their pending court cases, lawyers and Sci goons. Oh! and I almost forgot, they have to pay their Sea Org slave labor members about .25 cents an hour.

US Magazine reported on the 25th Anniversary and quoted Cruise about the Scientology protestors outside the event:

Later, during a reception, Cruise was overheard chatting with another American man about the protesters outside the venue. “They’re squirrels,” Cruise said angrily, according to a witness. “Stuck in an electronic incident. It makes me so angry!”

“Protesters are squirrels stuck in an electronic incident?”
Oh Tom, you certainly are one brainwashed mofo.
A ”squirrel” in scio-speak, means someone that messes or changes the tech of dead cult founder L. Ron Hubbard. Aka “squirreling the tech”. And “stuck in an electronic incident” is more scio babble from Hubbard’s work.

I wonder if Cruise actually said this though? Personally, I think if anything he would of called the protesters SP’s (suppressive people) not squirrels. And I think the “stuck in an electronic incident” line may have been borrowed from a video of another wacky Scientologist named George, which we reported on recently. Many duplicate videos of Scientologist George (who is an OTVIII, the highest that you can get on Scientology’s Bridge) showed up on YouTube and showed just how brainwashed Scientologists become the longer they stay in. The video is totally unscripted and SAD.

Cruise is supposedly an OTVII on The Bridge To Nowhere.

One more level to go Tom until you reach the tippety top to the Bridge of Total Freedom!
Yippee!
Good luck with that Tom! Wait till you see what OTVIII is all about!
SO worth the millions and millions of dollars that you blew. *snicker*

And now for something completely different and funny….
I was watching TV the other night, and there was a brief teaser for Season 6 of the steamy Nip /Tuck show, which started on Oct 14th. I thought I was seeing things, when I saw Mario Lopez completely decked out in black lingerie complete with a garter belt and black stockings. But no, I looked it up and yep it was none other than A. C. Slater (his name on Saved By The Bell) in drag!

Mario played Dr. Mike Hamoui on the series and he was seen in a steamy shower scene in a previous episode. Damn! I am going to have to start watching that show! Kudos for Mario for having the balls of steel for donning the less than flattering get up.

And even though Mario is one huge piece of eye candy…
sorry, this outfit just doesn’t cut it for me Mario. *snicker*

No I am not talking about his bathroom habits or Britney.

It looks like K-Fed is a real dirty bird and may end up as a jail bird if he doesn’t pay up!

TMZ posted pictures on their website which revealed the total mess and supposed damage that K-Fed left behind when he moved out of his rental property in Tarzana Ca. Gee K-Fed, just because you lived in Tarzana, didn’t mean you had to live like Tarzan. *snicker*
 
So I guess it is a case of white trash, leaving trash. No surprise there.

Although TMZ may have exaggerated things a bit, the place did look pretty darn unsavory. Most of the pictures they posted were kind of boring though. *Yawn*
But we included the two pictures that made K-Fed look like a total slob.

Laundry Day At The Federlines?

Other pictures from TMZ were almost laughable, like a few tiles missing here and there, or paint wear on the cabinets with a few knobs missing.

There was one picture of an outdoor lamp that looks like there was a bird’s nest behind it. Not sure where they were going with that one. Did they think K-Fed built the nest? Oh that’s right, he is a dirty bird. *snicker*

Of course the mini fridge was pretty disgusting and there was a myriad of ciggy butts all over the property and a busted lamp and some chips in assorted things here and there.

So I guess collectively it must have looked pretty darn bad to the owners. So bad, that the owners are asking for over $100,000.00 in payback for repairs and back rent. Yup! K-Fed skipped out on SIX MONTHS rent. Whoopsy!

Popeater wrote:

One-time rapper Kevin Federline, aka “K-Fed,” is being asked to pay over $100,000 in unpaid rent and damages for a ransacked home, TMZ reports.

Aren’t the parents supposed to clean up after the kids? One-time rapper Kevin Federline, aka “K-Fed,” is being asked to pay over $100,000 in unpaid rent and damages for a ransacked home, TMZ reports.

K-Fed has been accused of trashing a Tarzana, California home where he lived until this past May. The owners also claim Federline disappeared unexpectedly without paying his last 6 months of rent.

The owners are demanding $110,661 in damages and unpaid accommodation. The list of what has been wrecked is as bizarre as it is exhaustive. Via TMZ:

- Cigarette butts and empty beer bottles filling the gutters,
- A broken beer dispenser on the barbecue island,
- Cracked light covers,
- Mangled light posts,
- Cracked tiles,
- Drawings on the walls,
- Dead plants and trees due to failure to upkeep,
- Unapproved conversion of a room into a studio,
- Malfunctioning dishwasher with broken baskets,
- Smoke detectors that have been dismantled,
- Oil damage on the front driveway,
- Unapproved tinting of master bathroom windows,
- Missing garage door opener,
and the pièce de résistance
- Permanent spit marks on the exterior paint! No camels were reported on site.

The letter threatens to take K-Fed to court if he refuses to pay.

Federline, 31, is a dancer, rapper, fashion model and, ahem, actor. He was married to pop princess Britney Spears for two years before their highly-publicized divorce. They were also involved in an ongoing custody battle over sons Sean Preston and Jayden James Federline. There is no word about how clean the boys’ rooms are.

“Permanent spit marks” Huh? Maybe from chewing tobacco? Does K-Fed or his buddies partake in a little pinch between the cheek and gums? (that’s chewing tobacco for all you non-rednecks) if not, does spit actually stain paint? Ewww!

And lately, K-Fed has not exactly been the picture of health either, he is really packing on the pounds as you can clearly see.

I have read rumors that he was supposed to be on the upcoming VH1 Celebrity Fit Club Season 7, but then he denied those rumors.

But guess what? Celebrity Fit Club has just confirmed it.

Can it be that K-Fed is packing on the pounds on purpose so he can have a paying gig? It certainly looks that way to me. It seems awfully ironic that a person who has always looked very svelte, suddenly packs on the pounds and then is going to be on Celebrity Fit Club. Hmmm… I smell a rat.

Of course this is all speculation on my part. But I wouldn’t put it past Sean and Jayden’s baby daddy to supersize himself for the cash. Yes of course I know that the pictures prove he is portly now, but did he graze on food just so he can get on the show?

And if so… it further proves that reality TV has little reality.

He will also be appearing with his other ex, Shar Jackson as well as perpetual loser and Whitney Houston’s ex,Bobby Brown.

Egad, “Celebrity Fit Club” will do anything for ratings. Perhaps they can bring back Dustin Diamond (I hate Screech) with K-Fed and they can duke it out in the ring together. Now your talking ratings! I don’t know who I would root for. It’s  a toss up, but a double KO would be totally SWEET!

But seriously…

It’s time to grow up KEVIN. You’re over thirty, your career *cough* is toast, and your living like a slob. Your parenting skills have become pretty questionable now, (well, I should say have worsen) since you are not paying your bills and you turned a rental property into a total sh*t hole in your wake. Not cool when there are kids involved.

So to K-Fed… time to nut up or shut up.

Ok, first off…
Let me get this out of my system.

HA HA HA HA HA HA…ohhhhh…. HA HA HA HA HA!
*Wipes Eyes*
Sigh… Ok I’m better now.

Now I am not going to hold back, so if you are a Gosselin lover, (are there any left?) then you have been warned!

Kate Gosselin has recently stated that she would work at McDonald’s if she had to. Bitch PA-LEASE!

Hurry Kate! Your Turn To Switch On The Fryolator!

How can she have the audacity to say that she would work at McDonald’s? Now let me get this straight Kate, when you are busy doling out fries and burgers, who will be home taking care of your kids, dumb ass?

I caught TMZ on TV last night and they said it was going on day TWO that the nanny has picked up your kids at their school bus stop for crying out loud. Is anyone buying this crap? Does she think she can hire nannies to care for her kids while she is out slinging hash? Give me a break!

Or is this going to be her next reality show? “Kate Plus Ate” *snicker*

Everyone knows darn well that Ms. Gosselin wouldn’t be caught dead working at a McDonald’s. I am sure she thinks that working at McDonald’s would be a total subservient job. Can you imagine working with her? McDonald’s my ass!

But Oh dear!
What is Kate to do now that Jon no longer wants to do the show any more? It’s YOUR fault that you pissed away all your money, or you let Jon piss away all of the money. Who ever is to blame, it doesn’t really matter now, does it? The fact of the matter is, over two hundred THOUSAND dollars is now gone. What about your EIGHT children?

Looks like the Gosselins should have thought this through a LONG ago. But no, they were too busy getting “famous”.

US Magazine reported:

Could Kate Gosselin soon be asking if you want fries with that?

The mom of eight, 34, called into The View Monday to say she’d take a job at McDonald’s to support her kids if it came down to it. (A few hours earlier, she appeared on the Today show.)

Finding alternate work may be necessary now that Jon has halted production on her TLC reality show and left her with just $1,346 (down from $231,000) in a shared bank account, she said.

“We’re on temporary holding right now. A lot of this stuff is out of my control,” she said. “I can tell you that my kids are upset that it’s on hold, that the opportunities that they did have. For example, they’re supposed to be in New York. We were supposed to come up this weekend and see the Statue of Liberty and they don’t understand why we can’t do that now. So for myself and the kids, I’m hoping it goes on for the opportunities as well as, obviously, the financial. I mean, essentially, it’s my job, and I’m hoping to continue working.”

And if it doesn’t?

“I do know that no matter what, I know within myself that if I have to work at McDonald’s, I will do what it takes to provide for my kids, period,” she said.
Former co-host Lisa Ling, who was guest hosting the show Monday, challenged Kate’s desire to keep her kids on TV as they grapple with their parents’ split.

“My parents got a divorce. I can’t even imagine any of it being on television,” Ling said. “I don’t see what the problem is with stopping the show or taking the kids off the show for a period of time until things can get resolved…There have got to be other ways to make money than putting your kids on television.”

Your kids can’t go to the Statue of Liberty now Kate? Wahhhhhh. Maybe you should have thought of that before you two blew over $200 grand. 

But wait, hold on here…you got a free tummy tuck, but nobody would pay your way for Lady Liberty? What’s the matter Kate? Not networking enough? You didn’t tell the paps or the rags that you wanted to go to NY with your little money makers?

I am sure the National Enquirer would have paid you pretty well for that photo op! 

I can see the headlines of the Enquirer now..

“Kate Gosselin Begs For Spare Change Outside The Statue Of Liberty So She Can Afford To Send Her Kids To The Top!” *snicker*

Or is it that your popularity is dwindling and people see you and Jon for the total idiots you are?  Perhaps you two are no longer a hot commodity any more? *crosses fingers*

Sorry Kate, I do not have one smidgen of sympathy for you. Or you either Jon. You whored out your kids for cash and fame, and you were too big for your own britches. You acted like a total beeyotch and now you want everyone to feel sorry for you. You made money off your books, appearances and that horrible show, and now it’s all gone. Tsk Tsk.

I only feel sorry for your kids. You forced them into appearing on TV and did not care about their emotional well being. They have total idiots for parents who put themselves first and made horrendously BAD choices.

Taking those kids off the show is the best thing you can do for them right now. Let them be kids and have a normal life if that is at all possible. And Maddy can stand to use some serious anger management courses already.

But I am sure we have not seen the last of your kids. You will be pushing your kids into TV commercials or acting lessons so you can continue to live off them. Have to keep that dough flowing in! Right?

So Kate…and this goes for you too Jon, if you are hurting for cash (I find that hard to believe) you both are getting what you deserve.
I guess Maddy can always sue you two when she gets older. *snicker*

It’s a damn shame that your poor kids got caught up in the middle of your train wreck.

Looks like Spencer and Heidi have put a hold on their honeymoonin’.

Spencer Pratt aka Speidi (hate conjoined names with a passion) was interviewed by Pop Wrap of the NY  Post, and happened to mention that he hasn’t been gettin’ any from his wifey-poo because he is a fraid of her becoming pregnant. He is preventing Heidi’s dream of becoming a mother by refusing her sex. Oh Spencer, you are a side splitter!

He says that Heidi has him ”debating whether to cut off his nuts”. Considering there isn’t much to cut off in the first place Spence, I am sure there are many people standing in line who would be willing to do that for you.

Apparently, Spencer is mortified of Heidi going off birth control and not telling him about it. Hmmm, what’s that Heidi? Birth control? What would Jesus have to say about that?

Spencer also says that sex really isn’t a fact in their marriage. Wow, at their age, (or any age for that matter) I find that pretty sad and funny at the same time. Maybe they just totally bore each other to death in bed. Or perhaps they may be distracted by a mirror in the room and can’t stop looking at their reflections.

I guess Spencer and Heidi haven’t considered ALL the other alternatives they can do to get their groove on without doing the dastardly missionary position nasty. Perhaps you two should rent a couple of videos or buy a book or two?

But on the other hand.. maybe it’s a good thing that they are not reproducing. Speidi offspring is a frightening notion. After all, what will they do when their baby gets more attention then them? Oh the inhumanity!

At any rate, for the life of me, I don’t see how discussing their sex life, or should I say the lack of their sex life is very complimentary to their already failing careers. It makes Spence look like more of a wuss, and the admittance of Heidi’s birth control use, makes them look like the phony Christians they truly are.

People wrote:

There are many things most people would rather not dwell upon when considering the facts behind the marriage between Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, perhaps the most reviled pairing in reality TV.

Thank God sex isn’t really a fact in their marriage, according to Pratt.

Speaking to the New York Post”’s PopWrap on Tuesday, Pratt, 26, says that he’s tried to prevent Montag, 23, from realizing her dreams of becoming a young mother – by refusing her sex.

“I’m not even kidding, my wife – OK, I’m gonna get crass here – but we’re barely having sex because I’m scared that she’s gonna have a baby,” he says. “That’s the level our marriage is on right now. I’m not even kidding – my wife has me debating cutting off my nuts.”
Hidden Fear
Behind his abstinence is his fear that Montag might go off her birth control without telling him, he says.

“She’s not the kind of person who would lie – she would just walk away and not answer the question,” he says. “So yes, I’m very concerned. Our sex life has dramatically changed recently.”

Pratt, who hints that he’d like to go on a double-date with President Barack and Michelle Obama to “share the spotlight,” and bashes frequent Speidi mocker Joel McHale, host of The Soup, as “a struggling wannabe actor just clowning on reality stars,” also gets in a dig at Lauren Conrad – whom he claims quit the MTV reality show only as a ruse to get more money.

“She quit The Hills because Speidi was getting more famous than her. So she quit thinking the show would end, but she was wrong. Her ego ruined her life and her career,” he says. “I pray for her every day and we’d all love for her to come back to The Hills when she realizes her move didn’t work.”

Pratt says he wants to go on a double date with Obama? *laughs holding sides*

Gee, what would that conversation be like over dinner? Would love to be a fly on the wall during that outing.
Maybe the double date would go something like this….

Obama: “So Spencer, why are you famous again? And why did I agree to this double date?” (as Michelle ducks into the bathroom for the 3rd time since they sat down to dinner, to avoid talking to Heidi.

Spencer answers Obama: “Uh… excuse me? I was on I Am A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here dude!”

Heidi corrects Spencer and says, “WE were on the show“.

Obama says, “is that the show that you two left early and Heidi was crying all the time?”

Heidi interupts and starts to cry and whine… ”Yeah but… they were SO unfair! And there was icky bugs and stuff. And I was the only awesome person on the whole show! And if it wasn’t for Jesus, I would have left even earlier than holding out for those four torturing days. Thank God Baldwn baptized me on show”

Spencer chimes in “ahem! WE we the most awesome people on that show. We totally ruled dude.”

Spencer then asks Obama, “Well then, how about The Hills? Have you seen how awesome we were on The Hills?”

Obama, annoyed, realizing what losers they are….looks at his watch and says, “NO“.
 
Michelle comes back to the table and Obama gives the hint to Michelle for them to leave by shifting his eyes back and forth towards the door.

Spencer  says,  “you never heard of the Hills? Dude! that’s like SO impossible.”

Obama stands up and says, “well we really should be going, I have an important meeting tomorrow”

Spencer says, “ok cool man, you must be really busy with all the President dude stuff and all. Maybe we can do this again some time”The Obamas pretend not to hear Spencer as they hurry out the door.

Spencer proudly sits back and says ”Man, they totally loved us.”

And Heidi says, “Totally”

Spencer grabs Heidi’s leg, winks and says, “come on…. let’s get out of here and do some serious dry humping. Which I am totally rad at.”

Heidi says “Totally“.
End scene.

*Sigh*
I digress…
So back to not having sex and their dwindling careers….

Spencer and Heidi can always live off Heidi’s line of whore bag clothes called Heidiwood. (if they are still selling that is) I find the name Heidiwood for her fashion line totally ironic now.

Maybe they should change the title to “Speidi-Blue-Balls” and feature bedazzled chastity belts. Awesome!

Word of advice Speidi… Save your money dudes. I think your future careers will involve Heidi eventually doing a commercial for tampons. And down the line you both may be asking if people want paper or plastic.

Or perhaps you two can do a Christian public service video on abstinence? I can just imagine what it would sound like…. 
Spencer would say, “Just don’t do it dudes, you end up with babies and junk”
And then Heidi would say, “Besides sex can be SO icky! Yuck!”

I say if you want some really big bucks there’s always the all mighty sex tape leak that you two can fall back on. A comedy sex video that is. *snicker*

Oh wait….that’s  right… you ain’t gettin’ any.

Speidi Off To Dry Hump Like….Ummm, Errr…Rabbits?

Looks like Tawny Kitaen just can’t stay out of trouble.

Tawny aka Julie “Tawny” Kitaen starred in Bachelor Party with Tom Hanks back in 1984. She was also in a movie that she is probably not too proud of called The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik-Yak  aka Gwendoline in 1985 and then a horror flick, Witchboard in 1986.
Gwendoline was about:

” a 1985 erotic adventure based on a French comic strip. Stowing away on a China-bound freighter to search for her long-lost father, virginal Gwendoline (Kitaen) ends up in the clutches of randy sailors — till a daring adventurer (Brent Huff) saves her. Heading upriver to find Gwen’s dad, they soon crosses paths with the female warriors of the Yik Yak tribe.”

Wow! How she was able to get any work after that movie is pretty amazing. 

Tawny is most famous for her romp atop the hood of a jag in a video for Whitesnake. For all you youngins’ out there… Whitesnake was a big hair rock band back in the 1980’s.

The video she starred in was for their song “Here I Go Again” sung by her ex HUSBAND, lead singer. David Coverdale. (ick… sorry, he always grossed me out)
For a blast from the past, click here to watch a fuzzy version of her friskyvideo that guys are stil talking about today.

Her marriage to Coverdale only lasted a few years. And six years later in 1997, she married St. Louis Cardinals pitcher, Chuck Finley. They had two children Wynter and Raine.

Earlier Picture Of Much Happier Times

But trouble came knocking again when Tawny was arrested for beating Finely with one of her stiletto heels while he was driving and she was on the passenger seat.  MEOW!
Yeah, I know all the guys out there are probably thinking that sounds crazy sexy and hot. But sorry guys, it’s just crazy. And that little tiff could have killed the both of them.

Needless to say, three days later and not surprisingly, Finely filed for a divorce, which ended their five year marriage. And it’s also when the custody battle started for their kids.

Tawny continued her spiral down with continuing her addiction to drugs and alcohol. She starred in the sixth edition of Surreal Life and I remember watching that show. She really came off as quite the whack job. It was evident that she was high as a kite on that show. (well to me anyways)

She continued her reality show career on a stint with Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew. I also watched this show.

Tawny with Dr. Drew

She was totally different on this show compared to her behavior on the Surreal Life. I thought she was doing pretty good, by the end of the show and she also “graduated”. (of course we all know to take these shows with a grain of salt and that the reality part of these shows is pretty slim)

On VH1’s Celebrity Rehab website , it read:

 Tawny thanked fellow rehabbers for giving her hope, and friendship, something she really hasn’t had in the past.

I wonder what ex husband Finely thought about that statement?

Tawny then went on to an outpatient program in Newport Beach, so that she can be close to her family. Sure glad that she didn’t pick to go Scientology’s phony Narconon program and I hope she never does. Why am I mentioning Scientology? Because Scientology pounced on another rehabber from the show, Jeff Conoway when he left the show early.

Thanks to fellow Grease star, John Travolta. Travolta gave Conoway a whole library of Scientology books and the service of a Scientology ”auditor” who visited Conoway almost every day. Out of the pan and into the fire I say. Shame on Travolta for getting Conoway mixed up in the cult. Just utterly sickening.

Even though Conoway may have been tricked into thinking that Scientology actually helped him kick his addiction, their success rate for helping drug addiction through their Purification Rundown is actually like 6%. Not the trumped up numbers they lie about.

I haven’t heard anything further on Conoway and Scientology. I hope he dumped them like a lead balloon and finds some REAL help and without the cameras rolling this time.

Let’s hope the Scientology vultures keep their mitts off Tawny, as she would be the perfect candidate with her rocky past, her fragile state of mind and her addictions. Which to Scientology…Tawny would be “fresh meat” and prime for the picking.

So what is going on with Tawny now?
Well that brings us up to her latest escapade of getting pulled over for alleged  *snicker* DUI.

Eonline wrote:

Better get Dr. Drew on the phone.

Celebrity Rehab alum Tawny Kitaen was taken into custody Saturday afternoon near John Wayne Airport in Santa Ana, Calif., on suspicion of driving under the influence.

The 48-year-old former actress/reality star allegedly “made contact with officers after operating a vehicle while under the influence,” according to Sgt. Shontel Sherwood of the Newport Beach Police Department.

Kitaen, who has also appeared on VH1’s The Surreal Life, was busted in 2006 on drug possession charges, after police found 15 grams of cocaine in her San Juan Capistrano apartment.

The Whitesnake music video babe struck a plea deal with prosecutors in which they agreed to drop the felony drug charges after she completed a drug treatment program.

Geez Tawny!
Two failed marriages, drug addiction, alcohol problems, busted for felony drug possession and two rehab failures. Yikes! Aren’t you done yet?

So I wasn’t too surprised when I saw that the LA Times reported this past March that she put up her house up for sale in Newport Beach with an asking price is $3.45 million. *shakes head*

Egad Tawny!
Get your sh*t together! You have two kids!
You have obviously ignored several GIANT wake up calls.
Save what’s left of your life and got off that roller coaster before you become a statistic.

If not for you, then do it for your two kids who deserve to have their Mom be there for them.

Every once in a while you read something that just makes you cringe and say, Oh come on!
This is one of those stories.

Apparently, Simon Cowell has written a letter, excuse me… a VERY LONNNNNNG letter to his younger self and it was published in the Daily Mail. I didn’t read all of it, because #1…. I have a life, and #2… it was just making me cringe so much I was getting a crick in my neck. And also one of my pet peeves is someone talking in the third person.

First off, who does this? 
Or if you are so silly to do so, do you have it published so everyone can say EWWWWW and think you are a total douche? Really, can Simon be any more full of himself?

Simon must have started at a very early age. The picture below is probably how Simon started out.

Simon Give Us Kiss Now.. You Handsome Dog!

He wrote this letter to himself because his 50th birthday is right around the corner on Oct 7th. I was speechless as I skimmed over the letter and just couldn’t believe what I was reading. We couldn’t post the whole letter here because it was beyond HUGE.

It’s best to read the entire letter yourself on the Daily Mail website.
The letter was entitled, “SIMON COWELL: A letter to my shallow, reckless, cocky younger self“.
I kid you not. Oh! Be sure to have a bucket handy. Click here and gag.

Eonline reported:

Simon Cowell’s Gone Soft (and Long-Winded) in His Old Age

Someone needs to pull the pen from Simon Cowell’s fingers.
While we love it when the crotchety American Idol judge decides to air his dirty laundry in public (that Susan Boyle botch list was a classic), is an absurdly lengthy diatribe really necessary?

On the cusp of his 50th birthday next week, Cowell wrote a letter to himself published in yesterday’s Daily Mail in the U.K. In it, he looks back on the past few decades, scolding himself for poor decisions he made in the ’80s and ’90s and patting himself on the back for the good ones.

It would be a good, self-deprecating, third-person about-face, but regardless of what he says, nearly 3,500 words makes for nothing but a puff (as in puff, the magic ego) piece.

“You are on a roll and you think the good times will last forever but, oh dear, Simon. You are so, so wrong,” he writes to the 1980s version of himself. “You look like a complete idiot…you are overconfident, far too cocky and dressed from head to toe in expensive designer gear…It hasn’t dawned on you yet, you idiot, that you can’t afford any of this stuff.”

Of course, Mr. Tight T-shirts takes it easy on himself for the final 1,000 words or so.

“I must say, despite everything, I’m quite proud of you, Simon,” he says. “You’re happy, you’re content and just incredibly grateful for where you are.”

Then he goes on to list what’s changed for him over the years—really important things like what he drinks and snacks on and how he doesn’t like to bum $5 from anyone. He pats himself on the back for never marrying because he’s such a workaholic, and for staying friends with his exes.

“Your job, Simon, was to make celebrities, not to become one yourself, dear boy,” he says. “Underneath it all, Simon, you are a realist. You don’t believe the hype about yourself. You can see what you do well and what you do badly. People think you are this Machiavellian character, forever plotting and scheming.”

He ends his diatribe as Hallmark would have intended—”So happy birthday! Love Simon”—although we’d hate to see the card size needed to print this self-loving loathing opus.

“Happy Birthday LOVE Simon“? I think I just threw up a little.

The definition for narcissism is as follows:

1. Excessive love or admiration of oneself.
2. Psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconscious deficits in self-esteem.
3. Erotic pleasure derived from contemplation or admiration of one’s own body or self, especially as a fixation on or a regression to an infantile stage of development.
4. The attribute of the human psyche characterized by admiration of oneself but within normal limits

Well I am not sure if #3 applies to Simon, but it would not surprise me one iota!

His letter did remind me of a little poem from my grammar school days when people used to sign your autograph book when you graduated. The all so familiar ”roses are red” rhymes and those little clever ditties like “2 great, 2B, 4 gotten”.

No it wasn’t the “roses are red, violets are black, go sit on a tack“ rhyme that came to mind. (although it certainly would apply)

It was the following little poem, which I would like to dedicate to Simon on his upcoming 50th birthday….

You love yourself you think your grand..
You go to the movies and hold your hand.
You slip your arm around your waist…
And when you get fresh.. you slap your face!

With new reports of Cowell doing American Idol for another two years and also producing “The X Factor” in the US, he will be making over 100 million by this time next year. *shakes head*

It is quite obvious that he can care less that this letter to himself makes him look like a total conceited, pompous ass. Or maybe that is exactly what he wanted. His popularity seems to stay afloat by people loving to hate him.

Oh crap, I think I just contributed to that!
Touche’ Cowell!

Well, well looks like Bobby Brown has packed on the pounds. Bobby
and his double chin will be sweating it out on “Celebrity Fit Club” scheduled to air in 2010.

According to TMZ, he will be joined by cast members from “High School Musical”, “Baywatch” and “The Practice,” which will include Shar Jackson, Nicole Eggert, Tanisha Thomas, Casey Stroh, and Michael Badalucco. Is this the best Celebrity Fit Club can come up with?

I wonder if Bobby, who has always been tough to handle (to say the least) will succumb to the grueling boot camp and all the rules of “Celebrity Fit Club.” Many “stars” *cough* before him, like for instance Dustin (a-hole) Diamond aka “Screech” of “Saved By The Bell” fame, did not fair too well and had too much of an attitude to be on the show and ended up leaving.

Bobby’s track record of being an abusive crack smoking husband 
married to Whitney Houston (although she is not innocent by any means) certainly has crushed his popularity over the years.

Bobby better decide if he still wants to use his “My Prerogative” attitude or man up and stay on the show.

I happen to catch Bobby on D.L. Hughley’s show one night, and he sang My Prerogative, (it WAS a kick ass dance song) or I should say, he attempted to sing it. It was SO bad, it was painful to hear. His years of drug abuse, alcoholism and cigarettes really reeked havoc on his voice. It was totally shot. Don’t get me wrong, I do not have one smidgen of sympathy for this man.

His years or partying, abuse and just being an all around IDIOT have really caught up to him.

A Young Bobby Brown Back In  The Day

It's anyone's bet whether or not Brown will show up on "Celebrity Fit Club." The man can not seem to stay out of trouble. After all... he has been juggling living at two different homes over the years. *snicker*

But then again, ”reality” tv shows have to film their shows way in advance, so maybe this show has already wrapped?  Who knows. I just may have to tune into Celebrity Fit Club this time around, just to see Bobby sweating his butt off and being told what to do.

Will Whitney be at home watching with a big tub of popcorn? I only hope she will be tickled silly over getting to see a little pay back 
served up to Brown, rather than her cheering him on, because I never want to see Whitney, or anyone for that matter, looking like this again.

Crack is Definitely Whack!

To be fair, Bobby wasn’t all to blame for their insane relationship. It takes two to tango don’t forget. (geez! I sound like my Dad)
They were total partners in crime. And she should have left long ago. And of course Brown has always said that he never did cocaine before Whitney came along. HIS WORDS. Yeah ok.

I just know that I saw Whitney go from a vibrant and beautiful singer to an abused and skinny drug abuser after the two of them hooked up.

Their reality show they did together, “Being Bobby Brown” was short lived and a disaster, and Whitney ended up paying a huge price for standing by her man.

Now I was never a Whitney Houston fan, “I Will Always Love You,” has always pierced my brain, but she does have a beautiful voice. Even though her music is not my style, I do hope her recovery continues and that “The Voice” is able to get more of it back.

Her recent appearance singing on “Good Morning America” in Central Park and her talk with Oprah had her fans out in droves. Houston’s interview with Oprah was a far cry from her raspy voiced  interview with Diane Sawyer on Prime Time  (part 1) back in 2002, which is where her infamous “crack Is whack” quote came from. It was beyond obvious that she was in much denial, and very defensive. And Here is Part 2 of the interview, where she talks about her past missed appearances, drugs and actual footage of their marriage to Brown along with their 800 guests in her $40,000 wedding gown. 

In that interview, Whitney and Bobby were already married for 10 years and at that time she said she didn’t want to let go of Brown. I am just glad, as well as her fans, she finally did let go of him.
Bobby ends up joining the interview later on and denied he ever hit her and he said he was diagnosed as being bi-polar and denied all other drug use except smoking pot. *snicker* (Here are parts 3, 4, and 5 of that  2002 interview  if you are interested.)

Whitney’s recent interview with Oprah was like night and day in comparison to the interview with Diane Sawyer back in 2002. She looked like Whitney again. Finally Whitney came clean about the drug abuse, Bobby’s physical abuse and his infidelity and how her mother saved her life with an intervention and valiantly had Whitney removed from her house and forced her into rehab. Thank you Mom!

Her recent performance on GMA in Central Park definitely showed how much her voice has suffered from years of ”partying” and it was quite obvious that she wasn’t able to sing all the parts of the song and she seemed quite winded.

Rumors have it that ABC “digitally sweetened” her songs as reported by Gawker. But  it didn’t matter to her fans one iota, who seemed very elated to see her and were there to support her. Whitney is very fortunate that so many of her fans have never left her side.

Now back to Bobby…

Bobby’s fans? He has never had anywhere near as many as Whitney to begin with, and the ones he had, I think have totally given up on him for the most part. Partly because he has dropped out of the music scene long ago and because people blamed Bobby for ruining Whitney’s life. 

The man has always been his own demise. So your guess is as good as mine as to what the future will hold for him. My gut feeling is that he isn’t done abusing himself or others and he may stay clean for a while, but I don’t know how long that will last.

He is destined for a meeting with karma somewhere down the line, and he’s the only one who can change that.

It pains me to report stories like this.
Ethan Zohn, only 35 years old, who was the winner of Survivor Africa, has just learned that sadly his cancer has returned.

Ethan has Hodgkin’s disease which is a type of lymphoma cancer. Thankfully, Hodgkin’s disease is one of the more curable cancers and has a track record of being very treatable if caught in its early stages and there is a very high survival rate.

Eonline reported :

We really wish we could give him immunity.

Ethan Zohn, the grand prize winner of Survivor: Africa, has disclosed that after three months of intensive chemotherapy, his cancer has returned.

“I was running up to seven miles (training for the New York Marathon),” the 35-year-old told People. “I was happy, I was going out.”

Everything was going well until Aug. 26, when he learned the bad news.

“It was a complete punch in the face,” said Zohn, who has shaved off his trademark locks after losing much of his mane during chemo. “I have never been so scared in my life, for my life.”

“Then I’m cured,” he said, adding, “Whatever things are thrown at you, you’ve got to battle through with a smile on your face…and the important people in your life around you.

Zohn will now undergo a new treatment, including a stem-cell transplant, to battle the rare form of Hodgkin’s disease.

We wish Ethan courage and strength and hope to see him running in the NY Marathon again very soon.

Rocking It Out With Barack

Everyone knows how much Ellen DeGeneres loves to rock out and dance with her DJ Tony Okungbowa in the beginning of all her shows. But recently, Telepictures Productions was slapped with a lawsuit for using unlicensed songs.

Ellen has been dancing to songs during her show intro for years. I wonder why this lawsuit showed up now? Seems like something the record companies would have caught a long time ago. Maybe they are just hurting by the almighty crush of the internet and can use some cash. Remember that song back in 1979, Video Killed The Radio Star by the Buggles? Well the record companies must be singing, “The internet killed the record companies.”

Eonline reported:

Not everything can go Ellen DeGeneres’ way all the time.

It turns out that several major record companies think the dance-happy host rocks out a little too much and are suing Telepictures Productions over the unlicensed use of more than 1,000 songs on The Ellen DeGeneres Show.

You know how Ellen and in-house DJ Tony Okungbowa love their block-rockin’ beats. Per the suit, reps for Ellen said they don’t “roll that way” when the labels asked why they had not licensed the tunes.

But Telepictures doesn’t appear to be sweatin’ the copyright-infringement suit, telling reporters they have already been working with the plaintiffs to resolve their issues on “amicable and reasonable terms.”

The complaint, filed Wednesday in U.S. District Court in Nashville, does not name DeGeneres as a defendant. (Though theoretically this means she’s been dancing to the beat of somebody else’s drum all this time.)

Well I guess Telepictures isn’t worried, and I would imagine they have enough dough to make the record companies who filed the suits very happy.

Besides Ellen has bigger fish to fry these days. It was just announced that Ellen will be replacing Paula Abdul as the fourth judge on American Idol. Apparently, she is elated about being asked to join the panel, and said that she is not going to be mean like Simon Cowell, but rather will let him know when he is being too mean to contestants.

Sorry, I just have to say this. I don’t understand why Ellen was picked for judging American Idol besides her obvious love for music. It seems like everyone on the panel has had something to do with the music industry in their past and seems a little bit more savvy when it comes to judging?

Don’t get me wrong, I like Ellen. She has never bothered me, and I have always admired her courage — just wish she would talk to her Scientology buddies about leaving the cult) 

And as far as Idol goes…Randy what’s up dog? Jackson has always rubbed me the wrong way and I can’t stand Simon Cowell or the entire American Idol mania.

And remind me why Ryan Seacrest is famous again?

However, I have to give Paula Abdul kudos for her hits in her early 80’s singing career, (Opposites Attract, and Straight Up Now Tell Me) but sadly, he has become kind of ditzy over the years. Sorry Paula. 

Maybe Ellen will bring a sense of freshness and honesty to the show that they so desperately need. It seems that the panel has become bored out of their minds and less and less tolerant of contestants and it has become no secret that this show is steep with ”ringers” that are not the average joes off the street trying to make the rags to riches story become a reality. Even though Randy Jackson and Simon have been quoted as saying:

“Let’s sign them.” We’re out to find the best undiscovered [talent] and really herald that.”

Undiscovered talent?  HA!

There are handfuls of ringer contestants placed on this show which 
are actual struggling artists. Music executives are the ones deciding who should be the next star by marketing them on Idol. It doesn’t mean that these struggling artists don’t deserve a chance at stardom, but it makes the whole Idol contest process snarky and very deceptive.

Take David Archuleta for instance. At age 12 he won Star Search. During Idol’s first season, he met with finalists and sang for Kelly Clarkson and then within days it was arranged for him to be on the show.

Archuleta is only one example. There are MANY more ringers that have appeared on Idol who had previous talent, agents, careers, and gigs etc… Click here and feel silly for believing all the hype that surrounds Idol and their ability of actually finding undiscovered talent.

The truth is, that the days of Idol finding a total nobody off the street and having them make it big doesn’t exist any more. Which is why I wished this show was over long ago. It’s just not what it pretends to be. I think Paula Abdul got out just in time. I am waiting for her to write a tell-all book about Idol which would finally send Simon packing. *that would be totally dee-lish!*

American Idol will be starting up fresh this January with a brand new face on their panel. I doubt if Ellen is privy to all the ringers on the show. Why would they tell her? And if they did, would she agree with it? I would like to think she wouldn’t.

Again it’s not that these struggling artists don’t deserve a chance at making it big, or should I say bigger…. it  just seems wrong to promote the show as finding undiscovered talent. It is also sad for the other contestants, as it gives them even less of  a chance of making it in to the finals.

As quoted by Vote for the Worst  back in January of 2008:

So were the auditions just a formality this year? Because we’re fairly sure that if you have a Grammy winning duet with Alicia Keys, a band that opened for Britney Spears, or a prior relationship in show business, you probably weren’t waiting in line like the rest of the people who mistakenly assumed American Idol was a competition to find “the best undiscovered talent in America”. Then again, we all know what happens when you assume.

Count me out as far as tuning in to this “struggling artist ringer showcase”. Sorry Ellen, but at the very least, I hope you have a lot of fun on Idol cheering on the next pre-picked ringer!