Verne Troyer, aka Mini Me of Austin Powers movie fame, has just been slapped with a temporary restraining order from model Yvette Monet. We will get to that later.

I don’t know much about Verne Troyer.
With the exception of his performance as Mini Me (which I really enjoyed), and his previous appearance on the Surreal Life reality show… I just didn’t know anything more about him.

His appearance on Surreal Life gave me a tiny (no pun intended) look into Verne’s true personality, which kind of disappointed me. From his drunken naked romp on his scooter and peeing on the floor, to the very strange noises he was making after ”Peter Brady” aka Christopher Knight carried Verne back to Verne’s room and had to put him back in his bed. That scene is forever etched in my brain. Ewww. I also found Verne kind of bratty.

So I did a little digging on Verne, and became even more dissapointed. I was a little shocked to find there had been a sex tape leaked involving Verne and former girlfriend, Ranae Shrider  last year. (Verne is suing TMZ for twenty million for showing the tape)

Then there was the love triangle between Verne, Jason “Wee Man” Acuna,(Jackass fame) with Dominique Arganese. I guess some gals love the tiny ones.

Of course there was also Verne’s previous marriage to former Playboy centerfold Genevieve Gallen back in 2004, which lasted all of an entire month. Verne and Genevieve met at a New Years party at Heff’s Playboy mansion in LA. 

Genevieve, Verne and Heff

Genevieve had quite a bit to say (way too much) about her crazy month with Verne. She talked about them getting their sexy on ten times a day and some “sessions” lasting for up to 45 mins a pop. (Sting still has him beat)  She also said they did role playing, and wore costumes. Thanks SO much for that vision Genevieve.

Ok well fine. Nothing earth shattering there, except for the number of times he was able to perform. Which would put most men to shame, and make most women run and hide.

Just because Verne is only 2′ 8″ tall, didn’t mean he couldn’t get his freak on with Genevieve who is 5″ 6″. But I know what all of you are thinking… how did they do it? And er…. does Verne tuck it in his sock? Right? Don’t lie!

Well thanks to Genevieve, she let everyone know by stating this about Verne’s package (or lack there of) and how their love making was achieved:

“We had to be creative – but because of my yoga experience I could get into the right positions to make it work.”

“But I was surprised when I saw him naked for the first time that night-I had expected him to be better endowed. Verne’s body is proportional all over, so he was smaller than I expected.”

“He was a sex addict. He was then only the second man I’d ever slept with. He told me he’d had huge numbers of girls.”

“I had even researched what condoms to use for a little man,”

“With Verne I started experimenting with my own pleasure in ways I had never done before,” says Genevieve.“

Ok ewww… TMI on the that last quote there.
So I guess Verne is quite the little horn dog.

But wow Genevieve, not to pull a dumb blonde stereotype on you… but you were actually surprised that Verne wasn’t more well endowed? Did you really think you would be getting a Milton Berle? (Uncle Miltie was hung like a horse) Or did you think Verne was built like a chinchilla? FYI….chinchillas have unusually enormous schlongs for such a tiny varmint.
I wonder if Verne calls his winky “Mini Me“? Sorry, I couldn’t resist.

And Genevieve claimed that Verne was only the second man she ever slept with? Apparently, Genevieve thinks everyone has just fallen off the turnip truck.

All that aside… Verne appears to be pretty hot with the ladies and there has been no shortage of blondes for him to frolic with. But Verne does seem to have a huge demon. That demon is alcohol.

Genevieve claims that he used to drink a litre of vodka and a 12-pack of Budweiser in a single day.

Yikes! That’s an awful lot of libation for someone shorter than a yardstick. That amount of liquor would do a number on anyone’s liver among other things, never mind his teeny tiny liver. It doesn’t sound physcially possible for Verne to ingest that much hootch. But I guess anything is possible. I just don’t put too much faith behind what Genevieve has said, even though I have seen evidence of Verne crawling into the bottle and being sloppy drunk on more than one occassion.

There are many vids here and there of Verne feeling no pain. Just take a look on Youtube and the internet. One shows him falling over drunk on the ground near his limo, and another of him ramming his scooter into a door. There are videos of drunken conversations with people and let’s not forget the previously mentioned “peeing episode” on Surreal Life.

Vern’s drinking must not only be reeking havoc with his body, but also with his relationships.

More from Genevieve:

“At the end of the day, I think he was more in love with alcohol than he was with me.”

“Soon after I met him he almost drank himself to death. I heard he was in hospital and when I got there he was lying in bed covered in vomit and diarrhoea,” says Genevieve.

“Then there was a time when I got home and found myself locked out. I tried to wake Verne by banging on the door but he’d drunk so much I couldn’t. The neighbours called the police and I convinced them to break the door open to let me in.

“When I found him, he was face down clutching a pillow. I tried to wake him but it was impossible, so I had to pick him up still clutching the pillow and take him outside to present him to the police officers.

“They were shining the light on his head and Verne was mumbling, ‘What’s going on?” One of the police officers started laughing but the other one told him to stop. It was really embarrassing.”

Yikes, Verne what are you doing to yourself?

And now, with this latest development with former gal pal Yvette Monet, Verne had better get his sh*t together.

Yvette Monet is an ex St. Paul beauty queen and model. Of course.
According to The Hollywood Gossip:

Gorgeous model Yvette Monet has requested and been granted a temporary restraining order granted against her unstable former boyfriend … Verne Troyer.

Monet says she used to date Troyer but that they broke up months ago. She states that she believes he owns a gun and that she currently fears for her life.

Yvette says Troyer constantly texts and emails her despite her many requests for him to stop, and that he has sent threats telling her to “watch herself.”

She says Troyer has told her that his friend Burt has a gun and will do anything he says and that he has a cop friend called Jose who also has guns.
Has Verne Troyer really been making threats against his former girlfriend, Yvette Monet? On an unrelated note, was Verne Troyer really dating Yvette Monet?

She requested that Troyer be asked to stay away from her, her workplace, her home and her vehicle. The restraining order will remain in effect until December 2.

A Minnesota native, Yvette is a former beauty queen hailing from St. Paul. She was a spokes model for Merle Norman Cosmetics and has also modeled for Miller Lite.

She has also appeared on eight different television shows.

The 2′8″ Troyer has appeared in the Austin Powers franchise and also appeared in The Surreal Life. He is perhaps as well known for the Verne Troyer sex tape featuring him giving it to another ex-girlfriend, Renae Shrider, last year.

Verne was also seen around London this past February with former UK Big Brother contestant, Chanelle Hayes according to Hollywood Gossip. But who knows if they were actually dating? Maybe she was she trying to land herself a role in the upcoming Austin Powers sequel? I guess we will have to wait and see if Channelle turns up as Fembot.

Chanelle Hayes

Is it my imagination? Or do all these gold diggers look alike?

Gee Verne. A few words of advice….
I think your “mini me” can use a rest. Lose the blondes for a while, and kick that bottle to the curb.

Concentrate on finding yourself, and find yourself some good rehab. (be sure it’s not Scientology or Narconon which are two in the same)

You need to focus on keeping your career on track, especially with the new Austin Powers sequel coming up. Nip all this mess in the bud before you are known as another “high risk” actor. (hello Lohan and the Hoff)

Hopefully you will meet someone who is right for you, and not some gold digging bimbo.They may look pretty on your arm, but what are their true intentions? Unless of course you just don’t care.

As much as digging into Verne’s personal life has really made me cringe, with his sex-capades and his drunken episodes caught on video, I still am rooting for Verne to turn himself around. I don’t know why.

Maybe it’s because I really enjoyed him as Mini Me, or the fact that he can fit in my suitcase. Or maybe it was that little mention of him being able to go ten times a day.

Does anyone have his number?  *SNICKER and EWWWW*

Hey! Now Put That Away Verne!

Early “Promo” Picture Of John and Kelly

One of Hollywood’s big questions right now is whether John Travolta is having serious doubts about Scientology. Added to that question now is his future with wife Kelly Preston. They are having a very difficult time dealing with the loss of their son Jett who passed away this past January. I don’t think anyone ever gets over a death of someone that is near and dear to their hearts, and healing from a tragedy such as this can prove to be both exhausting and devastating.It is especially hard to function after a death if you are always under the microscope of paps and fans. But that is part of the package deal of being famous.

It was just announced that John and Kelly have backed out of being part of the  Maria Shriver’s Annual Women’s Conference this October, due to Kelly saying they were just not ready to speak out about their son’s death. Totally understandable. This cancellation was only one of many signs that their son’s death has really taken a huge toll on them.

But is it more of a toll for John than Kelly? John was too distraught to promote his most recent movie Pelham 123, and he has been seen recently packing on the pounds. But really who can blame him for wanting some comfort food?

Star Magazine, although not the most reliable or credible source for news, to say the least, just reported that John has been staying in bed most days, visiting Denny’s restaurant at 3 AM, and watching videos of son Jett and crying. All very normal behavior after a loss, as long as it doesn’t consume one’s life. Star is also reporting that John and Kelly are not staying together at the moment. Separation is not abnormal for many couples that have lost a child. It’s a common occurrence.

But what is a normal for Scientologists when it comes to grieving and death? As we have mentioned before in earlier articles, Scientology is not “too big” on death. They consider their bodies only as ”meat bodies” and that they will reincarnate and come back many many times. Grieving as well as many other emotions associated with death are deemed extremely low on the Scientology Tone Scale.

Scientology claims that emotions such as these can be handled and removed  by counseling and auditing on an e-meter. (which is basically a lie detector) 
But why? Why should NORMAL emotions be swept away? Anyone with half a brain knows that grieving and depression is a big part of healing, and to suppress it, can be a very slippery slope. If someone blocks these emotions, it may manifest itself in a bigger and much more harmful way down the road.

But suppression is one of Scientologys’ specialties among its followers. According to Scientologists, all  answers to life’s problems lie within the teachings of Scientology’s founder, the late L. Ron Hubbard.

Hubbard, a quack sci-fi writer, con man, and scam artist taught his followers that a person would be considered “out ethics” if they didn’t handle those emotions. Hubbard considered these emotions weaknesses, and if a member does not handle these emotions and get them under control, then that person is labeled a “PTS” or potential troubled source. To make it even sillier, things such as colds, headaches, injuries, or any other health problems, can also cause yo to be labeled a PTS.

What if someone is exhibiting mental problems? Well, they simply don’t exist according to Hubbard, and he also stated that anyone with a mental problem is a degraded being. Which really did not make a whole lot of sense to me, due to the fact that if mental problems don’t exist according to Scientology, then how do degraded beings exist? *scratches head*

Simple, because Scientologists are conditioned and taught to believe and accept whatever they are told according to Hubbard’s teachings, even though the contradictions are rampant.

How did Hubbard feel about homosexuals? He considered them perverts and that they should be cast from society and institutionalized.
In Hubbard’s own words from HIS  actual babblings from the Science of Survival, Book 1, Chapt. 13, at 90. 

“Such people should be taken from the society as rapidly as possible and uniformally institutionalized; for here is the level of the contagion of immorality, and the destruction of ethics;”

But then Scientology offers an alternative, from the same babblings from Science of Survival Book 1, Chapt. 13, at 89:

“The only answers would seem to be the permanent quarantine of such persons from society to avoid the contagion of their  insanities and the general turbulence which they bring to any order, thus forcing it lower on the scale, or processing such persons until they have attained a level on the tone scale which gives them value.”

So according to Hubbard, a person who is gay should be quarantined and that their insanities (gay) are contagious to other people in society, and they can only have value if they are processed through Scientology and then and only then they can attain a level that is on their Tone Scale.  So… did Hubbard think gays should be removed from society and institutionalized? Or they should be “processed”? Well, which was is it?
Both are beyond deplorable, and how anyone can follow and pay for these teachings, makes my blood boil.
 
I can only imagine how John must feel about all this wacky mumbo jumbo rolling around his brain which makes no sense what so ever. As far as Kelly goes, I am a bit confused about how she is handling her grief. I think she accepts just about anything she is told through Scientology’s teachings more so then John. I am not saying that she is not as distraught over her son’s death, I just think that she is handling it the “Scientology way” and erasing the feelings of grief and guilt and is moving on a lot faster than John. Of course one parent being able to move on faster than the other after a child’s death, is also normal. Especially for the fact that there can be a much more deep rooted connection between a son and father and mother and daughter or vise versa. It’s just that Scientology’s methods of “healing” are  not only harmful, but down right despicable, as they charge you to “heal”. Keep in mind, you are not really healing, you are blocking and suppressing your normal emotions.

Although Kelly did cancel the upcoming Conference this October, she was recently seen out with Miley Cyrus for dinner and chatting about an up coming movie they will be working on together called The Lost Song. Not too long ago Miley also did the movie Bolt with John. Careful Miley.. the cult would love to get their hands on your oodles of cash! You don’t want to achy break Billy Ray’s heart!

I certainly hope  that John has had some recent epiphanies or at least some serious seeds of doubt with the passing of his son, and questions the teachings hog wash of Scientology.

Taking his son off anti seizure medication was not favored by many of the general public and many thought that it was the wrong move, and made John and Kelly partly or totally responsible for the death of their son. Many believe that Jett should have been put on some other medciation immediately, rather than being put on Scientology’s Purification Rundown. The anti seizure medication, Depakote that Jett was taking is a psyche drug and totally unacceptable for a Scientologist. So unacceptable that some Scientologists considered John and Kelly as  SP’s (suppressive people). Although some Scientologists would argue that Depakote is not a pysche drug.

As you may or many not know, Scientology’s considers ANY psychiatric drugs an abomination. Which is one of the reasons why many Scientologists die way too early in life from many different afflictions. (even though their “clears” aren’t supposed to have any afflictions)  Fact both John and Kelly are listed as clears.

So why then are John and Kelly having so many problems?  Because Scientology simply doesn’t work.

 Now I don’t agree on the over drugging of children or anyone for that matter, and I think their is WAY too much drugging going on with both children and our senior citizens. But some people need certain medications to help them cope with their every day existence. Plain and simple.

So you can understand why there was such a turmoil with John and Kelly’s lives with having a child that was autistic. You see both Kelly and John are a very big advocates of the CCHR. The Citizen’s Commission On Human Rights. Their title is laughable considering Scientology’s total disregard for any of their member’s human rights.

Kelly Pictured At A Psychiatry Protest On The Right

The CCHR is one of Scientology’s many front groups which has a global plan for the total obliteration of psychiatry and psyche drugs. Videos have surfaced of current Scientology cult leader David Miscavige at an IAS (International Association of Scientologists) boasting about this obliteration of psychiatry and quoted in the video saying  that Scientology,

 ”booby trapped the whole psychiatric ecosystem”.

I kid you not.  If you haven’t watched it, it is worth the watch. Click here and be horrified. This video is VERY scary, and you have to wonder how it is legal for them to go after psychiatrists and have their licenses revoked and then celebrate about it. To hear the people cheering in the audience about Miscavige’s speech is reminiscent of Hitler.

Speaking of Hitler, in Scientology’s own words from their CCHR website they claim:

“Psychiatrists admit they created the euthanasia program and ideology that fueled Hitler’s holocaust.”

 Yes, you can go view all their wonderful Scientology fabricated “facts” and disturbing pictures of the holocaust at their Psychiatry An Industry of Death exhibit in California or their traveling exhibit. I would hope if this exhibit is scheduled to come to your town, you write to your town officials and put a stop to it.

Just One Of Many Horrific Pictures Inside the CCHR Exhibit

Both John and Kelly as well as BFF Kirstie Alley and other Scientology celebutards were present for the ribbon cutting for the permanent exhibit in California. Don’t get me wrong,  I am not a big fan of psychiatry for the most part, but again, some people desperately need it and have greatly benefited by it. I have yet to see any ACTUAL benefits from Scientology that was worth what they paid.

Back to the CCHR…
What makes the CCHR  even more disturbing is a group called the Office of Special Affairs aka OSA which is funded by donations to the CCHR. They are a group of “thugs” whose job is to dig into the private lives of any critics AND psychiatrists. They will do all and everything to Fair Game anyone is who is critical of Scientology, or ex Scientologists that have left and spoke out  by harassment and “dead agenting”them.
But wait it gets worse….

Both Kelly and John where also in Hawaii some years back to promote Narconon, which again, is another big Scientology front group.
Narconon’s program, consists of people enduring long hours of saunas which goes on for days. They ingest large amounts of oil and are required to do excessive amounts of exercise.They also must take large doses of niacin “vitamin bombs” which Scientology believes rids the body of all toxins. This method is also used for supposed drug rehabilitation and has been funded by towns of taxpayers not knowing  it had ties to Scientology.

This treatment which is called the Purification Rundown, (as I mentioned earlier) is also used in their other front group program Criminon in some jail systems. All the same program, all using the Scientology Tone Scale, with the same regiment of saunas,vitamins and exercise.  The only difference is Scientology using different front group names to deceive and confuse. More disturbing, is that this program is being administered by non professional people and has never been medically proven to work, and has been called quackery by many REAL doctors.  It also can be quite dangerous to the liver. Thus the numerous court cases which have popped up and continue to come.

Believe it or not, they had the NY Firefighters on this program after 9/11. Tom Cruise was even there with the firefighters. Of course Scientology snuck  in under the name  the NY Rescue Workers Detoxification Project.  Pretty sneaky huh?

Desperate people on drugs seeking help and town officials who do not do their homework can be convinced that this program works by their trumped up success numbers and trumped up testimonies. They were kicked out of a town in New Mexico last year, and left in the middle of the night and still owe over $600,00.00 in tax liens and 17,000 to the city for unpaid rent and utilities. Not to mention they released several dangerous inmates back into town. Of course they were going under the pseudo name of ”Second Chance”, but they were just another Scientology front group which was run by Scientologist and jewelry hawker Joy Westrum. How she is walking around a free women is beyond me.

So again… what does all this and the Purification Rundown have to do with John and Kelly? They put their son Jett on the same program hoping it would cure him. 

I have asked this question before…  how difficult would it be for a person to put a child with special needs on this rundown? I don’t understand how they were able to get Jett, who was obviously autistic through this exhausting and long treatment. It makes no sense at all. Anyone who has an autistic child can attest to the difficulties that would arise in trying to make an autistic child or any child for that matter, endure this treatment. It would be not only cruel for the child, but damn near impossible in some cases without the child being held down or drugged. No questions where ever asked pertaining to this treatment that John and Kelly admittedly put their son Jett on. I find that very puzzling.

Could it be that Scientology is still considered a “religion” in the US and the Government stays clear of “religious beliefs” ? Well yes, that’s a big part of it.Yet another reason why Scientology has been able to fly under the radar so long by using religion as a cloak to hide under. But when it comes to people being harmed, shouldn’t they be stepping in? Yes they should, and then the question is, what the heck are they waiting for?

So why did John insist that his son had Kawasaki disease instead of autism in the first place? Because Scientology does not recognize autism. John finally admitted his son’s autism when Jett was rushed to the hospital the morning of his death, but that report did not surface until months later. The actual Royal Bahama police report surfaced in the news and it contained John’s statement to the police which said:

 ”My son suffered from a seizure disorder and he was autistic”.

Scientology’s response to Jett’ death was too quickly get John and Kelly ”handled”  and into counseling and auditing ASAP. (of course on John and Kelly’s dime) I find all of this beyond despicable and further proof that Scientology is the furthest thing from a “church” as you can get.
 
One would think the sheer quackery of Scientology must have left John with some huge questions and  feelings of guilt for adhering to the cult’s teachings in dealing with not only with Jett’s problems when he was alive, but also dealing with his own grief after his death.

To further complicate things, is the big question of John’s sexuality. It’s not a secret that many people believe that John is gay and has been living on the DL for many years, and that his marriage to Kelly was “arranged” to take the heat off him. Not only for his career, but also for the fact of Scientology’s beliefs on gays.

When it was reported and photographed that John was seen kissing his son Jett’s nanny on the lips, it was not kept secret for very long, and it was never denied. In fact Travolta’s spokesperson said it did happen and that John is VERY friendly and he kisses everybody. Ok, but why would it be appropriate for an employer to kiss their child’s nanny? And where are all the other pictures of him kissing all these other people?

Hey don’t get me wrong, I could care less if John is gay. I wish he would come out and tell the world, and I would welcome it. And I am sure many of his fans feel the same way. Deep down inside I think that John is a caring, decent man that got tied up in this cult back in 1975 when it wasn’t AS corrupt as it is today with current leader David Miscavige running the show. (however it was always a huge sham)

One of many of the disturbing things with Scientology is, is that your life is an open book. Any secrets you may want to keep about your personal life gets revealed through Scientology’s auditing. They have your entire life on file and kept in your “PC” folder. It contains all your very personal information including anything  and everything sexual. And as recently reported, Scientology has no qualms about making your private information public. As we witnessed in the recent Scientology edition of their Freedom Magazine which was a beyond laughable rebuttal to the three part series of the St. Petersburg Times articles.

The SP Times, (as called by Scientology) reported about four top executives that left  Scientology and spoke out about beatings administered by cult leader David Miscavige and the emotional and physical abuse of other members that they witnessed. I certainly hope both Kelly and John got a chance to read it. I would imagine that Kelly refused to read it though. It was full of Scientology spin and called the four defectors that left Scientology comic book charachter names like The Adulteress and so on. It was written with he said/she said, high school mentality. If Scientology was trying to make themselves look credible with their latest issue of Freedom magazine, then they failed miserably.

Cult Leader David Miscavige Pictured On Cover

Maybe the outing of the defector’s files was a warning to other Scientology members as a scare tactic of what Scientology is capable of doing if you should leave and speak out. One can’t blame John for being scared. It’s a pity in ANY religion that someone would have to be afraid of their own “church”. Especially one that you have dumped millions of dollars into like John and Kelly.

So between John and Kelly’s grief over their son, John’s supposed sexual preference and all their deep dark secrets, and  fear of repercussions from the cult, Scientology has them by the short hairs to say the least. Let’s just hope they can snap out of it and come forward and lift the burden from their hearts and not let Scientology continue to rule and ruin their lives.

Sadly, I don’t think Kelly is willing to let go of Scientology, unless the cult totally crumbles, and even if it did, she would probably become a Freezoner in my opinion. (groups of people who still practice Scientology, but not in the “church” under Miscavige) Perhaps Kelly’s strong ties to Scientology may be part of the reason for their current separation. ( if in fact the Stars magazine’s story has any integrity at all)

It’s a tough pill to swallow, isn’t it?
Scientology’s beliefs and actions are SO archaic and secretive, it’s hard to believe  that this goes on today. Which oddly is another reason why they continue to get away with it. Some people and the media included think that these things can’t possibly be happening. And some are afraid to speak out about Scientology due to their litigious nature, which makes Scientology’s veil of secrecy continue.
That’s why we continually report what is going on in Scientology land, because people have to be made aware of these atrocities.

 Times are changing  for the better though and more and more people are coming forward with their stories. In a previous article we mentioned a list of ex scientologists that have spoken out. That list is now over 600 names listed on the  Why We Protest Wiki. The names tell sad tales of just how corrupt an organization Scientology is.

The list will only continue to grow and grow as more people step into the light and join others and say, I have my life back . I am happier than ever and I want to share my story with the world and help others!

So John, we have told you before….
If by chance you are reading this, I am sure your fans are waiting with open arms John. You can be a hero. You can save other Scientology members from a life of misery, financial ruin and also save some lives. Put an end to Scientology’s ruthless abuse and family disconnection of it’s Sea Org members too.You can write a tell all book and sky rocket your career.
You can help Scientology members get the medical help they so desperately need to live longer and  healthier lives.
If not for yourself John, do it for your son Jett.

Proud Papa John with Jett as a Baby

Although nobody knows yet if John will decide to stay in the cult, one thing is for certain…
as long as he stays with Scientology, he will never be free.

For help leaving Scientology, or just for someone to talk to, call 1-866-XSEAORG, this is a toll free call.

Just in case you were wondering how Perez Hilton manages to do it all, we may have found the answer:  Rumor has it that the Perezinator doesn’t do his own stunts, if you know what I mean:

We had lunch yesterday with someone closely connected to Perez Hilton who confirmed what we’ve suspected for a while now:
Perez no longer writes any of the content on the site.

The only things Perez Hilton actually contributes to his own website these days are the video blogs he puts up from time to time.

He’s got not one but THREE writers he’s hired (including a new one who loves to use the word “Fehk”) so he can go gallivanting around, propagating his own celebrity while his minions do the heavy lifting.

Lame!

That ain’t Cyrano, that’s Milli Vanilli.

But at least now we know why his site has started to suck in the past year.

You know, it’s rather ironic that someone who broke into the business telling stories on other people is now the subject of rumor and hearsay themselves.  It’s also rather ironic that someone who supposedly got into celeb blogging because they enjoyed it so much is now such a big star in their own right that they don’t even have time to do what made them a star to begin with.

I mean, what’s the point?  After all, what IS Perez without his site?  Just another fat-guy-on-the-inside with bad skin and horrible taste in clothes who is still nursing grudges from his childhood.  If he isn’t writing on his site, then why is he a “celeb” at all?

TTTT, I haven’t visited Perez’s site in stinkin’ forever, mainly because it just gets boring after a while.  I mean, come on.  Yeah, he does manage to break news on new music, and sometimes he does get exclusive scoops…but I’d rather have modest success and be able to sleep at night.

(For some reason, and it may be because it is Monday, I wanted to write, “Does Perez Hilton Use Dunt Stubles?”  I dunno.  It just sounded funny.)

It seems that all is not well in Gosselinland.  Jon Gosselin, dad of twins and sextuplets and long-suffering husband of shrewish Kate, apparently has been seen and photographed supposedly visiting a bar and, according to Star magazine, this isn’t an isolated incident:

On TV, he is a harried father of eight with a wife who is constantly on his case, so it’s not surprising that Jon Gosselin needs to blow off some steam.

And in recent weeks, the star of the TLC reality show Jon & Kate Plus 8 has been doing just that — slipping away from his new $1.3 million mansion to party the night away with a bevy of college cuties!

The father of twins and sextuplets has been living it up in Huntingdon, Pa., where his mom resides. He turned up uninvited at a Feb. 6 party thrown by Juniata College seniors Erin Albert and Mariel Little — and ended up playing the drinking game beer pong with members of the women’s volleyball team!

Of course, you can find out More! Juicy! Details! when you pick up the latest edition of the rag (and I emphasize that it is a tabloid).  But here’s a sneak peek:

According to the Magazine, Jon–who along with Kate and the rest of his brood recently moved into a $1.3 million dollar mansion in Pennsylvania–recently crashed a party at Juniata College in nearby Huntington, PA and played beer pong with members of the women’s volleyball team.

The following night he apparently went to a nearby sports bar, again with members of the women’s volleyball team and allegedly made out with a number of them.

The Magazine quotes a witness at the bar as saying:

“He was dirty dancing with several of them, making out, kissing them on their necks and mouths. I thought it was rather surprising for a father with his wife and so many kids at home to be acting like this. He was all over one girl, a long-haired blonde who’s nearly 6 feet tall. He left with several of the girls, including her.”

Jon is also said to be frequenting other bars close to his home, even spending Valentine’s Day away from Kate. Supposedly, he’s even tried to pick up women while out with his mother.

The details may or may not be true.  The story behind the photo?

According to a user on a Jon and Kate fan club thing on a baby site, Jon was at a bar in her town recently:

“So i live like 15 mins away from the town j and k used to live in. Well my friend was at the bar this weekend and saw jon at the bar. She said he was with some girl she didnt know, and he was buying all these girls drinks. I dont know how true this is, but if it is im gonna be really upset. I really hope he want cheating!”

Jon, for his part, has this to say about that:

In a statement issued through his rep, Jon says: “It is certainly hurtful for people to spread rumors and lies about us. It certainly makes me reluctant to live my life like the average person would. This has made it very clear that the simplest innocent gesture — such as taking a picture with a fan, can be taken out of context.

“As you can see on the show, I am not perfect, but I am a part of a loving family and couple.”

But wait, there’s more…

Peace indeed!

Reports are surfacing that scheduled performer Rihanna was a no-show for the Grammys tonight after being injured in a “car accident.” Problem with that story is it coincides with another report about her boyfriend Chris Brown being wanted for questioning by police after an incident involving Chris “allegedly” beating up a woman sometime last night. Here are the details from The Insider:

Sources at the Grammys tell “The Insider” that Rihanna’s face is slightly bruised and no announcement has been made as to who will be taking her place on stage. “We have just been informed that Rihanna will not be attending tonight’s 51st Annual GRAMMY Awards. We’re sorry she is unable to join us this evening,” The Recording Academy’s statement reads.

Related to the Brown investigation, police say Brown and the woman were in a vehicle in the Hancock Park area of Los Angeles when, following an argument, the woman was allegedly injured, naming Brown as her attacker. When police arrived, they only found the woman; Brown had left. The Associated Press reported Sunday afternoon that police were still looking for the male R&B star.

Police say they received a 911 call related to the incident which occurred around 12:30 a.m. on Sunday. The LAPD is investigating the incident.

Color me jaded and somewhat suspicious, but I’ll bet these two events are related. If it turns out that Chris Brown (who I USED to like) beat on our sweet little RiRi, I will personally give him a beatdown, or at least write mean and vicious things about him on this here website. Seriously, few things are more loathsome than a grown-ass man beating on a woman. Shame on him for hitting any woman. Throw the book at him, and a shoe, and perhaps a heavy purse for good measure.

Actually, if this is true, I’m sure Jay-Z will make sure Chris is “taken care of ” if you know what I mean.

We will keep you posted on this story.

Update: TMZ is reporting that Chris Brown turned himself into authorities this evening to answer questions about the incident. They are still refusing to name the female who accused Brown of assaulting her, but the TMZ report states that Chris and Rihanna were together earlier in the evening at that much-talked about Clive Davis pre-Grammy party. hmmm….the plot thickens.

I’ve been married a long, long time, and I realize that there are times when one must take off one’s wedding band.  When you’re doing some sort of mechanical work, for instance, or if you’re putting on hair color, or stripping furniture, or performing a heart transplant.  But this is a new one on me…Jennifer Lopez, around whom divorce rumors have been swirling faster than a tornado in a trailer park, said that she didn’t wear her wedding ring at the Golden Globes because it didn’t match her dress:

JENNIFER LOPEZ has denied further rumours her marriage to MARC ANTHONY is in trouble, insisting she didn’t wear her wedding ring to the Golden Globes because ‘it didn’t go with the dress.’

The actress made the bizarre remark after she was snapped posing on the red carpet at the awards ceremony without her wedding band.

But J. Lo insists she was just making a fashion statement.

She told American magazine In Touch: “Every time I’m not wearing my ring, people think I’m getting divorced.

“That’s crazy. It just didn’t go with the dress.

“Divorce is not and was never an option.”

Orly.

I don’t know about you, but when I get dressed up one of the first pieces of jewelry I make sure I have on is my wedding band.  But then again, I don’t have to match sparkly jewelry to sparkly gold dress.  That’s just too difficult, so I’d better leave that to the pros like J-Lo.  We can’t trust important things like this to amateurs!

But let’s revisit an earlier article about Jenny From The Block:

Rumors swirled that Lopez’s marriage was on the rocks after she showed up to the premiere of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button last week without her 8-carat diamond engagement ring, wedding band – or ever present husband, Marc Anthony (who was spotted in Las Vegas sans wedding band the weekend before).

Multiple sources confirm to to Us Weekly their marriage is at a breaking point.

“They both didn’t wear their rings on purpose,” a mutual pal of the married couple of four years (who renewed their vows in October) tells Us. “Nothing Jennifer does is without purpose.”

You could try to tell me that Jennifer showed up to a global awards show, where she had a pretty good idea that her photo would be taken, would stand there holding her little clutch purse with her ringless finger prominently on display, and then try to tell me it was all coincidence and that she just couldn’t coordinate the ring to her outfit…but I’d still have to put my money back in my pocket because I ain’t buying it.

Look for these two to call it quits any day now and for J-Lo to gravitate more and more to Scientology.

Oh, but better than the missing ring…check out the look that Kate Winslet is giving Jennifer!  Now THAT is priceless.  Kate gets an award from me just for that!

Who would have thought that it would be Blake Incarcerated-Again who would be the one filing divorce papers?  Everybody expected Amy to dump him, especially since it is said that she recently claimed she was taking a sunny vacation just to wait for Blaaaaake:

After Amy Winehouse was pictured in the arms of a clean-cut young actor, friends may have hoped she was finally about to ditch her jailbird husband.

Yet the singer has announced that she plans to return to him – after she has spent six months in the Caribbean.

Amy, 25, has told friends she wants to stay on St Lucia until she can be reunited with Blake Fielder-Civil, who began serving his latest prison term in December.

She appeared to have abandoned her marriage after becoming close to actor Joshua Bowman, 21, while staying at the luxury Le Sport spa on the island.

Yet far from thinking of divorcing the man who introduced her to heroin and crack cocaine, Amy plans to stick by him in spite of his conviction for assault and perverting the course of justice. [...]

However, they say Amy has begun drinking again and is merely flirting with other men while she ‘waits’ for her husband.

‘Amy was walking through the resort with the ‘other Blake’ [Wood] on Thursday, and they were looking quite kissy and cuddly,’ said an acquaintance who overheard the encounter.

‘She spotted her friend Stan Clayton, the owner of Mustique’s Firefly Hotel, and loudly announced, ‘It’s great here. I’m staying for six months, waiting for my husband to come out of jail.’

‘It was strange. She was saying she intends going back to her husband and this other Blake character was just sitting there, looking as if he couldn’t care less.

‘They all had lunch and then she went down to the topless beach. On Friday night she made a spectacle of herself again. She got trashed on wine.’

But the most recent news is that she says she’s in love and that her marriage to Blaaaaaaake was based on drugs, drugs, and something called drugs…which, predictably, ticked off Blaaaaaaake enough to file for the Big D:

Celebrity lawyer Henri Brandman told MailOnline that Blake had instructed him to launch the action on the grounds of Amy’s adultery. It is thought that Blake will go for half of Amy’s £10 million fortune.

The move comes as loved-up Amy told a Sunday newspaper that she has finally kicked her drug habit. The star also admitted that she had ‘forgotten I’m even married’ to Blake, claiming ‘our whole marriage was based on doing drugs’. [...]

Contrary to earlier reports that she was waiting for Blake to join her on the island, the singer told the newspaper: “I love it here and have never felt so happy.

“In fact, I don’t think I’m ever going home.

“Especially as I met Josh here. He couldn’t be more different from my husband, which isn’t a bad thing.”

She also branded Blake ‘rubbish in bed’, adding, ‘Almost every time I slept with him it was like I was dead’.

Well, now.  So taking a vacay to St. Lucia was just what the doctor ordered to get Amy off drugs, huh.  Clinics, doctors, rehab, none of that worked, but going off to a tropical island and finding a new beau was what she needed.  Get my skeptical crayon, because that’s what I’m going to have to color this picture she’s drawn.

You see, what Amy has to realize is something most of us have had to come face to face with…wherever you go, there you are.  That means that her problems weren’t left in London when she hopped on that plane…she packed them in her suitcases, she put them in her purse, she loaded them in her pockets.  A change of scenery is often good to get our minds off our problems and the stuff we deal with, but what happens when the new, exciting vacation with new, exciting people becomes the same old drudgery with the same boring folks?

People like Amy crave not only drugs, but excitement.  She’s got to have constant drama in her life, constant upheaval, continuous movement.  I think that’s one reason why her little trip to the islands has seemed to “work”…it’s a change and she needs change.  The thing is…will she still be clean (and we don’t know for sure that she truly is) in six months?  In a year?  When she moves back to London?  If she dumps this new guy?  Even if she decides to live in St. Lucia?

Don’t get me wrong.  I truly hope Amy can conquer her addictions.  I want to see Amy clean as much as anyone does, and I’ll be the first one in her corner (as I was when she performed at the Grammys) if she can truly stay clean.  I realize that kicking drugs is a moment-to-moment decision and a slip doesn’t mean the person has failed…you just have to get up and start again.  I just hope that she sees this trip is a temporary respite from her normal life, and that she must keep this “clean” mindset once she rejoins “normal” life.  We all, Amy included, shouldn’t jump to conclusions that Amy is “cured”.

Oh, and Blake Incarcerated-Divorcer and his little filing?  That would be the best thing to happen to Amy since she discovered the beehive.  I do think it’s a little rich of Amy to put the blame for her bad marriage on Blake, but then again these two aren’t exactly deep, introspective thinkers.  From Blake’s blaming himself for introducing Amy to drugs to his own lack of interest in honoring his marriage vows, I find it hard to muster up any sympathy for this guy.  However, one minute he’s acting like a total jerkface and the next he’s saying how much he loves Amy and wants to help her…wow, I can see why she had to take drugs when she was with Blaaaaaaaaaaake.  I need a Midol myself just to finish this paragraph about him.

Now, about that “Blake” tattoo…

Why do people insist on getting pregnant, having babies, and then heading to divorce court before the tots are even walking yet?  They aren’t there yet,  but rumors are swirling that there is tension between Jennifer Lopez and husband Marc Anthony, and that things have gone from babies to bad times:

Rumors swirled that Lopez’s marriage was on the rocks after she showed up to the premiere of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button last week without her 8-carat diamond engagement ring, wedding band – or ever present husband, Marc Anthony (who was spotted in Las Vegas sans wedding band the weekend before).

Multiple sources confirm to to Us Weekly their marriage is at a breaking point.

“They both didn’t wear their rings on purpose,” a mutual pal of the married couple of four years (who renewed their vows in October) tells Us. “Nothing Jennifer does is without purpose.”

I believe that.  Girlfriend should get together with Mariah Carey and compare control-freak notes.  But wait…is there room in the family for two control freaks?

“He’s very, very controlling of her,” a close Anthony pal tells Us. “The skirts aren’t as short. You don’t see so much of that booty anymore.” The new Us Weekly also reports that Anthony also picks out Lopez’s clothes and keeps tabs on her phone calls.

But Lopez — who once claimed she “loved getting his opinions” — has become less interested in his approval since the birth of their 10-month-old twins, Max and Emme.

“She walks in from work, washes her hands and grabs the babies,” a longtime friend tells Us. “With him, it’s almost like, ‘Ugh, they’re crying again?’”

Yeah.  Babies cry, Marc, that’s what they do.  You should know that, since you already had kids before Jennifer came along.

It also seems that Jennifer doesn’t like the life of a housewife, like the lives of so many other little people in the world:

Another problem: Lopez — who once commanded $15 million per film — “blames Marc for her career going down the tubes,” says a mutual pal, adding that she’s bitter about the failure of their 2006 drama, El Cantante, which only grossed $7.5 million. (Her 2002 flick Maid in Manhattan earned over $94 million.)

“Jennifer looked around and said, ‘This is my life now? I’m a Long Island housewife?’” a pal says. “She hates that everything she worked for went down the tubes.”

And Marc just can’t seem to keep his mouth shut about how much his wife drives him loco:

Anthony has also been badmouthing his wife. One night after their tense family Thanksgiving in which the couple “didn’t sit together,” Anthony hit NYC hotspots Bungalow 8 and Marquee, where he was spotted with his hand on a woman’s thigh and overheard complaining about his wife to a group of women, “telling them, ‘She’s making me miserable,’” a source says.

His club spree didn’t stop there: The next night, he was photographed by TMZ.com partying sans wedding band with pal Eva Longoria Parker and Russell Crowe in Las Vegas. (A source says, “According to Jennifer, he didn’t cheat.”)

Now there’s a smart move…because, of course, nobody in the world knows who J-Lo or Marc are.  I’m sure he was totally anonymous!

But wait, there’s more…

And that of course begs the question:  Does anyone truly care?

Rumors are flying hot and heavy that Mariah’s little fantasy land will soon have a new occupant:

Spies in LA saw the songbird [...] coming out of a well-known ob/gyn’s office on North Crescent Boulevard, “clutching what looked like a sonogram and being greeted by her entourage with cheers. She was ebullient.” It was the same type of paper that Minnie Driver was holding when she found out she was pregnant at the same doctor’s office.

Mariah has, of late, said that she totally wants to be knocked up:

The Hero singer said: “It’s (having children) part of the whole purpose of getting married.

“I’d just want our children to have the best childhood and upbringing they possibly could.”

And it is at this point where I remind people of probably one of the most insane things I’ve ever heard a star say (and remember, I’ve written about Britney Spears):

“It’s hard to have kids in this world,” she told OK! magazine. “I don’t think I could properly educate a child right now. Maybe in the future, but I actually haven’t thought about it.

“For now, I enjoy my dog Jack’s company. It’s definitely because of childhood traumatic stuff. The whole not wanting to have a baby as a baby.

“I never wanted to feel violated and I know that’s a kind of weird thing to say, but that’s how I am.” [emphasis mine]

Now, let’s look at the dates of those two statements, the first of which was one of the first times she actually came out in public and said she wanted kids:

• She made her “I’d feel violated if a fetus shared my body” statement in late April 2008.
• She got married on April 30, 2008.
• She made her “Oh wait, I want to be a baby mama after all” statement in early May 2008.

Seriously, like two weeks apart.  Right in the middle of that, she got married to a man she’d dated for only six weeks.  Yes, she’d known him for a few years, but I knew a lot of guys for years that I didn’t suddenly get married to.

But here’s my question…does she realize that babies like to play with toys?  She might have to share some of her stuff with the alleged child.  She’d better put a lock on that Hello Kitty bathroom (if she already hasn’t…she probably had ten kinds of fits thinking about poor Nick Cannon totally laying a log in there).  Oh yeah, and they do things like poop on your white carpets and throw food all over your expensive kitchen.  Did anyone tell her about the stretch marks?

Somebody should also tell her that all attention in the room goes to the smallest, cutest, most helpless thing…which is usually either a baby or a kitten, depending on which entered the room last.

Note to Mimi:  Babies are not for photo ops, sound bites, or to further what is left of your so-called career.

Winona Ryder, who, if you recall, has a bit of a history with things ending up in her purse that don’t belong there, is looking a bit suspicious in the disappearance of some fancy baubles (seen above) loaned to her for a party:

Sticky-fingered actress Winona Ryder mysteriously lost a diamond-encrusted bracelet and ring worth more than $125,000, according to a published report.

Ryder told Bulgari jewelers that she misplaced their gems, which had been out on loan, after wearing them at a Marie Claire bash in Madrid on Sunday, according to the French celebrity-news magazine Voici.

The “Girl, Interrupted” star – convicted in 2002 of shoplifting in Beverly Hills – claimed she lost the precious stones after handing them in an envelope to her hotel’s front desk for safe keeping.

But Voici reported no hotel surveillance cameras captured Ryder giving the jewels to front-desk personnel.

Bulgari has asked police in Madrid to investigate, according to Voici.

This, on the heels of an emergency plane landing concerning Winona and a mysterious illness, now believed to have been an accidental overdose of Xanax.  It is said that she hates flying.  That’s understandable…I’m not so sure I wouldn’t have to be knocked out on a trans-atlantic flight myself.

Of course, it’s all rumor and alleged at this point, but let’s put it this way…I wouldn’t loan my valuable jewelry to her.  Not that I have any, you understand.  And it’s not like I know Winona.  But if I did know her, and if I did have some hypothetical expensive trinkets, and if we did so happen to be in the same place at the same time, I wouldn’t let her borrow them.  Hey, I ain’t sayin’, I’m just sayin’.