The Cleveland Cavaliers tied up the playoff series with the Boston Celtics tonight in true Cleveland fashion = all or nothing. During the game, Cleveland star and local hero Lebron James collided with Celtics forward Paul Pierce and the two ended up spilling into the crowd. According to BallDon’tLie blog, Lebron’s mother, Gloria, a local loose cannon went all ghetto on Pierce and started to ball him out, to which Lebron responded with a “Sit Yo Ass Down!”

Once a mom, always a mom.

[Editor’s note: since YouTube is “performing maintenance” (or in other words, auditing their inner thetans) I can’t verify if the woman is in fact his mother, so let’s throw caution to the wind and assume it is]

Yes, just when you thought the saga of Roger Clemens couldn’t get any stranger, it gets stranger.  I admit I haven’t been following this whole Roger/steroids story as much as some (I’m not a big baseball fan), but when Shaun Daily mentioned this on his BTR show yesterday, I sat up and took notice.  It seems that he and troubled country singer Mindy McCready met when she was fifteen and this developed into a long sexual relationship:

Roger Clemens carried on a decade-long affair with country star Mindy McCready, a romance that began when McCready was a 15-year-old aspiring singer performing in a karaoke bar and Clemens was a 28-year-old Red Sox ace and married father of two, several sources have told the Daily News. […]

Contacted by the Daily News Sunday through his lawyer Rusty Hardin, Clemens confirmed a long-term relationship but denied that it was of a sexual nature.

“He flatly denies having had any kind of an inappropriate relationship with her,” Hardin said. “He’s considered her a close family friend. … He has never had a sexual relationship with her.”

Apparently, Mindy began travelling with Roger after they met in a bar where she was singing at age fifteen:

Hardin said the Rocket’s wife, Debbie, knew McCready and that the singer had traveled on his plane. […]

[Brian] McNamee, who worked with and traveled with Clemens extensively over the last decade, has confirmed that he saw Clemens and McCready together on many occasions, including in Clemens’ room at his apartment in the former SkyDome, now Rogers Centre, in Toronto, and that Clemens talked of McCready often. Should McNamee decide to countersue for defamation, McCready could surface as a witness for that case as well.

According to sources, Clemens was with his Red Sox teammates in a Fort Myers, Fla., bar when then-teenager McCready caught his eye. After Clemens threw a shirt with his and several teammates’ signatures onstage, an introduction was made.

“It was love at first sight, no doubt about it,” said a source with intimate knowledge of the relationship.

According to the source, McCready did not learn that Clemens was married to Debbie Clemens until McCready attended a baseball game with her two younger brothers and read Clemens’ bio in the program. The source says that McCready was too young to be angered by the news that Clemens was taken.

Roger has sued his former personal trainer for defamation of character, a bit ironic and a huge risk since when you do so, you claim you had unsullied character to begin with:

From a public relations standpoint, Clemens’ decision to file the suit against McNamee the night the Rocket appeared with Mike Wallace on “60 Minutes” could end up being the biggest risk he has taken yet. Clemens, under investigation for perjury, has already endured the ignominy of publicly admitting his wife’s own human growth hormone use, having photos of bloody gauze and needles linked to him and embarrassing scrutiny of an alleged injection-site abscess on his buttocks. […]

“The issue in Roger’s suit against McNamee is Roger’s reputation and how it has been damaged,” said Richard Emery, one of McNamee’s lawyers who is handling the defamation suit. “If it’s proved that he’s a philanderer, his reputation is already damaged. When you sue for defamation, you put your whole reputation in the community at issue. Anything is fair game, including his claim of sanctimonious purity. We would cross-examine him and other witnesses who might impact on his alleged behavior. We would probably subpoena her and witnesses who knew [of the relationship]. He’s a ‘family man’ - he implies that. It’s about what his damages are. All is fair game.” […]

The seven-time Cy Young Award winner’s orchestrated public relations blitz began shortly after the Dec. 13 release of the Mitchell Report on drug use in baseball. It focused as much on Clemens’ family-man reputation as it did on McNamee’s checkered past and apparent lies about his involvement in an incident in Florida in 2001 for which he was investigated for sexual assault. No charges were ever filed in that case, but Clemens’ lawyer Hardin papered the media with accounts of the incident.

The relationship with McCready paints a very different picture of Clemens than the one drawn by Jose Canseco in his book “Juiced,” where he went out of his way to say that Clemens was one of very few professional ballplayers who was faithful to his wife.

And it smacks of a different Clemens than the one who spoke passionately of his family in his opening remarks to Congress Feb. 13. Debbie Clemens was seated behind her husband at the hearing.

“Anyone who has spent time around me knows that my family is and has always been my top priority,” a portion of the statement read. “My wife, Debbie, and my sons - Koby, Kory, Kacy and Kody - mean more to me than anything in the world. Having said that, baseball has definitely provided me with significant opportunities off the field.”

But wait, there’s more…

Robin Leach (yes, that Robin Leach) has some interesting dirt on what went on between blonde singer Jessica Simpson and QB Tony Romo this past weekend.  Apparently, they were in Vegas when a weekend that started out beautifully, with parties and breakfast in bed, suddenly turned very ugly:

It began when Jessica, Tony and the players all hit the Peacock Lounge for high limit blackjack. Jessica was said to have won $5,000 and then they retired to their penthouse while the others went onto the Body English nightclub. The couple even spent some time tanning in the sunshine rays at the new $8 million makeover pool at the Hard Rock while watching the NFL draft on their private cabana HD TV screens. At some point, however, allegedly Tony, who was rumored to be paid a $15,000 appearance fee at Body English took the money and went gambling. My spywitnesses tell me that by the time he was finished he’d lost a fortune and I swear to you I was told that the figure could have run as high as a whopping $2.5 million. Whatever the staggering loss totaled it immediately put a damper on their fun weekend. I’m reliably told Hard Rock officials offered to pay Jessica a bonus $25,000 if she’d co-host at Body English the second night with Tony.

Allegedly a livid Jessica refused because she’s paid far more for personal appearances and the fun weekend had suddenly turned into a commercial gig. Also she was said to be “angry beyond words” over his gambling and the large loss. Insiders told me that one thing led to another and they wound up in a “furious fight.” I was then told that instead of turning up together for a third day of “fun in the sun” at DMX’s party for the re-opening of the Rehab summer pool they both left town unexpectedly.

That pop you just heard was Joe Simpson’s head exploding.  Twice.

Forget Jessica (and the heart attack this news is sure to give her father).  I’m wondering if Tony needs a personal assistant, because anyone who can drop that kind of cheddar and still be rich…well, either he should hire me as a PA or I need to learn to throw a football.

I guess only time will tell if the rumor of their going their separate ways is true or not.  Expect a denial from Jessica’s camp any moment now.  But Robin has proven to have excellent “sources”, so…?

I wonder if they had caek in their suite?

And then you have these two morons.

Let’s compare and contrast my post yesterday about the low-key, classy wedding thrown by Eli Manning and his long-time girlfriend, and the white trash, hillbilly affair that Tony Romo’s birthday bash turned into.

Yes, Jessica Simpson threw boyfriend Tony a party, and the affair disintegrated into a caek-slurping mess:

 The PDA-packed bash took place Saturday night at Suite, a lounge in Dallas, where “she sang him ‘Happy Birthday,’” Kyle Kearbey of DMagazine.com, the Web site for Dallas’ D Magazine, tells Usmagazine.com.

The two really seemed to enjoy the cake, which was in the shape of a Dallas Cowboys star and had Romo’s No. 9 jersey number on it.

“They were kissing with lots of messy cake!” adds Kearbey. “Jessica had cake all over her hands and was licking her thumbs.”

I’m sorry…I’m not a prude or an old fogey, but this is really just gross.  Is she trying to be sexy or something?  Is acting like a baby with their first birthday cake sexy?  I’m not adverse to having fun with one’s food, but if Jessica and Tony want to play like this with their caek then they should keep that stuff in the privacy of a room with plastic sheets and walls that you can hose off.  When I see people out in public acting like this, I want to remind them that the world at large isn’t there to be their audience.

Perhaps, just maybe, it would have been a little bit acceptable had they rented a private room for their party, but they were out in a public place.  Geez, nobody wants to see things like this.  It reminds me of toddlers who smush food all over their faces just to see what sort of reaction they will get.

There’s fun, and then there’s just stupidity.  Let’s guess which category this one falls into.

For more photos (if you can stomach it), go here.

Over the weekend, Giants Super Bowl-winning quarterback Eli Manning done went and got himself married up to his long-time girlfriend Abby McGrew:

Giants quarterback Eli Manning wed his college sweetheart Abby McGrew during a beachfront ceremony at sunset Saturday.

About 60 loved ones flew to Mexico to join Manning and his bride for the intimate ceremony at the One & Only Palmilla, a swank resort along the Sea of Cortez on the Baja Peninsula.

Manning, 27, and McGrew, 24, exchanged vows while standing on a platform in the sand as waves crashed over rocks behind them.

The family was on hand to wish the happy couple well, including Super Bowl-winning brother Peyton, who offered some words of encouragement before the ceremony.

It seems that the whole event was laid-back, enjoyable, and fun for everyone:

Hours before the ceremony, Manning worked out pre-wedding jitters, hitting the gym by 10 a.m., running furiously on the treadmill, lifting weights and doing push-ups for an hour and and a half.

During the rest of the day, the Super Bowl MVP and his bride stood by the old adage that the groom not see the bride the day of the wedding. […]

Manning’s parents, Archie and Olivia Manning, were overjoyed to see their youngest son get hitched.

Archie gave a heartfelt toast Friday night before a rehearsal dinner in front of the resort’s old Spanish Mission Chapel, getting tears in his eyes as he raised his glass.

Manning and McGrew met when they were students at Ole Miss. He proposed last March during a quiet date in Hoboken.

The couple is famously low-key and kept their wedding plans under wraps until just last week.

Wedding guests remarked all weekend about how relaxed Manning had made the celebration for all of them.

Good for them.  I’m happy for Eli, whom most people wrote off as a QB while he was still trying to find his footing with the Giants.  Say what you will about the Mannings (yeah, people have, and I’m sure more will in response to this post), at least we don’t see photos of them splashed across every newspaper and sports section in the land for all the wrong reasons.  When was the last time you saw either Peyton or Eli in the news for drunk driving, or being busted for drugs, or for beating up their wife/girlfriend?  They seem to have settled down since college (like most people do) and all you hear about now are either their prowess on the football field or their philanthropy works.

And face it…it’s refreshing to see a famous couple who don’t need to get over themselves.  Rumor is the wedding set Eli back about $500,000, which by celeb wedding standards is pretty modest.  And spending the day floating around in the pool with your buddies while your big brother tells embarrassing stories about your youth sounds to me like any good ol’ boy’s wedding, not some stuck-on-himself overinflated-ego jock who believes the world revolves around them just because they can throw a football.  It’s a nice palate cleanser.

Best wishes to the happy couple!

What, is baseball that hard up to find players who aren’t on steroids?  Don’t you hate it when the new guy you sign falls and breaks a hip?  Ooh, I hate when that happens.  (I kid because I love.)

Billy Crystal, comedian and die-hard baseball fan, is fulfilling a dream by signing a deal to train and play a game with the New York Yankees:

Comedian Billy Crystal will sign a one-day contract with the New York Yankees and play in a spring- training game against the Pittsburgh Pirates on March 13, one day before his 60th birthday.

Crystal is a New York native and lifelong Yankees’ fan who frequently attends games at Yankee Stadium. In 2001, he directed and produced the film [“61*,]” which chronicled Roger Maris and Mickey Mantle as they sought to break Babe Ruth’s single-season home run record in 1961.

Crystal’s minor-league contract was approved by Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig and he’ll join the Yankees tomorrow for workouts at the team’s training facility in Tampa, Florida, according to a statement from the team.

“I’ve been waiting 50 years for this call,” said Crystal, who will wear uniform No. 60. “I’m overwhelmed by the generosity of the Yankees and Commissioner Selig. I know this (will) be tougher than the Broadway Softball League, but I’m looking forward to helping the younger players, which, by the way, is all of them.”  

I don’t watch baseball, but I’d like to see coverage of this game.  Billy Crystal has long been one of my favorites and I know he is relishing this opportunity.  When my kids aren’t paying attention to what I’m saying, I look at them and say, “Norman, helloooooooooo…”

Yeah, they look at me kind of like you are now.

Now, I wonder if we can get David Letterman in an Indy car?

So instead of taking snaps and executing quarterback sneaks at the Super Bowl, this weekend Tony Romo was reduced to carrying around Jessica’s wig.

I started to feel sorry for the guy, but then I remembered he makes more money in one game than I make in five years, so I got over it pretty quick.

Hope that trip to Mexico was worth it!

My favorite Super Bowl ads…please feel free to agree or disagree with me:

But wait, there’s more…

K told you it was ultra not good, but here’s the video. Judge for yourself.

Britney’s VMA performance was only slightly worse, and at least her derivative drivel is a bit more inspired. Paula, no offense, but you are better behind the table than in front of it.

*ducks and runs for cover*

So maybe you’re having a Super Bowl party, and one of your guests gets just a little too, shall we say, happy after imbibing of your refreshments, and then they proceed to regurgitate all over your new flat screen. Or maybe you’ve been invited to a party by a friend, and you go with someone who is your ride, and you can’t leave even after the drunken host starts hitting on you, and then, in the boring third quarter, attempts to get you alone by locking you in the guest bathroom and trying to get his own backfield in motion.

But I guarantee you aren’t going to have as bad a time as this guy:

It was bad enough for screenwriter and New England Patriots fan Scott Rosenberg when his model/actress girlfriend Bridget Moynahan left him for the quarterback of his favorite football team. Now, with the Pats in the Super Bowl and Giants fans expecting to taunt Tom Brady with masks that have his ex-girlfriend Bridget’s face on them, Rosenberg (the writer of such films as High Fidelity, Con Air and Gone in 60 Seconds) is feeling even more pain.

“I don’t think the masks will upset Brady at all,” he told PageSix.com last night at the Maxim Super Bowl party held at Rande Gerber’s new Scottsdale restaurant, The Stone Rose Lounge. “The only person the masks will bother is me. Me in a sea of Bridget masks. That’s how the story ends.”

Think about that when your neighbor spills his Bud in your queso dip.