In an interview for Entertainment Tonight (set to air Monday) actress Katie Holmes revealed that while she’s really happy to be back at work (and away from the alien glares of Scientologists) she is definitely prepared to once again become impregnated by her husband, fellow actor and “Jesus of Scientology,” Tom Cruise.

Katie who is on the set of her latest film “Mad Money,” talked about life with a new baby. The couple gave birth to their first child, Suri, in April of 2006 and Katie states she really enjoys her role as mom and stepmom to Tom’s two other children, Isabella 15, and Connor 13. Connor and Isabella are from Cruise’s  first marriage to Nicole Kidman. They too are Scientologists, which must really suck for them.

“The kids are so sweet, they’re so great with Suri and she lights up when she sees them,” she said. “We have so many kids in our house, there’s always this wonderful chatter and the great noise of kids.”

Two words I would never use in a sentence that included “noise of kids, chatter” are great and wonderful. But hey, to each his own. When asked if there were to be future Tomkittens, Katie’s responded: “Yes, definitely!”

Well, thank goodness, because we certainly can’t count on Brad and Angelina to repopulate the earth all on their own, they only want other people’s castoffs.

There is a building crisis in the Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes household.  Recent pictures and stories have shown us a growing independent streak within Tom’s young wife Katie –but independent thinking and actions might not be without its price.

Tom Cruise is a well-known control freak and that controlling nature extends to every aspect of his life.  According to an interview on “Scarborough Country” with “E!’s” Ted Casablanca, the celebrity biographer Andrew Morton (Princess Diana, Monica Lewinsky and the Beckhams) is currently writing a tell-all book about Tom Cruise, but is having difficulty finishing it.  Despite having written about the royal family, who are notoriously private and insular, Morton said ‘he has never met anything like Tom Cruise before, that the royal family is no comparison to Tom Cruise - he’s such a control freak.’

Much like his character in the film Magnolia, Cruise is a manipulator of women, especially those whom he deems as easily malleable - like say, Katie Holmes – a beautiful young star who openly stated that she had childhood fantasies of marrying Tom Cruise.  How eerily perfect.  When trying to find a replacement for his estranged ex-wife Nicole Kidman, Tom didn’t so much date around, as peruse resumes of up and coming starlets.  Resumes, that were likely scrupulously overseen by his Scientology brethren.

Tom Cruise takes Scientology VERY seriously.  This is not so much a faith, as it is a calling. 

But wait, there’s more…

It would seem the real reason that Katie and Tom seem so dour as of late is the fact that they have Tom’s mom, Mary, his sister, Cass, and her two sons living with them in their Beverly Hills home. No matter how much you love your in-laws, and no matter how big your house is, having that much family around has got to be really annoying. This week’s In Touch has the details on why Katie is less than happy about the arrangements.

Katie talked to Harper’s Bizarre about her living arrangements in a March interview:

“We live with my sister-in-law, her two sons, my mother-in-law and our kids. There’s always something going on in this house.”

An insider close to the family says that while she accepts Tom’s adopted kids Isabella, 14, and Connor, 12, she is NOT digging all the extra family around and as the insider put it, “What new bride wants to eat breakfast every morning with her mother-in-law?”

Um, none. I can relate to Katie’s predicament. I have two older step-children who are awesome, but it’s not always fun and games. They resent the new ones and you are often reminded that you aren’t their mother. Which leaves you somewhere in between being a wretched bitch and occasionally a close friend. But having your in-laws, including his free-loader sister and her two fricken wildebeasts hanging around has gotta really blow. Move out, you damn leeches!

Despite the couple’s plans to buy a new home, a private compound in the Hollywood hills, chances are the baggage is coming with them. Tom likes having his extended family around, regardless of Katie’s need for some privacy with her husband and kids, and let’s face it, Tom’s a momma’s-boy — not too mention — awfully chummy with his three Scientology sisters.

I bet the antennas are on high alert in that household now that Tom’s mom, Mary Lee, has also been converted into a Xenu lover. Poor Katie and little Suri. On a positive note, the new place is said to have three separate houses on the grounds, so maybe she and the kids can escape from the lunacy from time to time.

One more thing, Suri is not only one of the cutest little Hollywood babies, but she is definitely Tom’s kid. Look at her face, she looks just like him. Hopefully his looks are all she inherited. I hear “the crazy” can skip a generation. I got my fingers crossed Suri!

I am no body language expert, but when has not being an “expert” stopped me from giving my opinion?  Exactly.

First of all, that outfit that Katie is wearing looks like she stole it from my aunt. My aunt who’s like 80, but tries to dress like she’s 60, only to  up looking like she’s 200.  So, needless to say, I am not digging that look.  That said, she looks hot as Hades compared to Tom, who’s sporting the cheesiest butterfly collar and a Daddy Warbucks suit.  Also, do these two sleep in his’ and her’s coffins? Because Tom’s skin looks clammy and dare I say — untouched by the light of day, and Katie’s eyes look dead and soulless.

Based on recent reports, Katie and Tom are having some marital dischord related to Tom’s over-controlling ways.  There are rumors that Katie’s been calling her pal Posh for late night crying and whining chats about Tom, and spending up to FOUR hours on the phone with the former Spice girl turned professional shopper. There’s further speculation that Tom won’t give Katie time away for herself, tells her what projects to work on, and even worse,  rumors that he called their friends, the Beckhams, 18 times in one hour about joining the Church of Scientology.  WTF? That is really annoying. 

The phone should NOT be used as a weapon. 

When those damned disabled people call trying to sell me a box of lightbulbs for $40 a box I tell them “Why would I buy a lightbulb from a friggin disabled person? What do you think I am blind? You a-holes.” and then I swear at them some more and scream loudly in the phone “you suck” and hang-up.  

I suggest Posh and Becks do the same thing, just replace lightbulb with “Xenu” and disabled person with “crazy midget,” then add a “keep your hands off our bloody money you filthy buggers” and perhaps a “Your mother is whore!”  Message sent, loud and clear.

One final note: the fact that Tom is allowing Katie to TOWER over him in these photos making him look most unmanly, it’s obvious these two read the tabloids. The photos were from last at the Mentor LA’s Gala honoring Tom, and you just know that Tom told Katie “I’ll tell you what Katie, you can wear your high heels tonight, but as soon as we get home it’s back on the mothership for your ass, you insubordinate little ingrate.”   And you just know that Katie likes that master and servant thing.  HOT!

P.S. 
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