So here it is sweeties. Your play by play of Friday’s Oprah Interview with Tom Cruise. I should state for the record that in general, I tend to be sympathetic of Oprah. She’s not perfect and she has, I think, lousy taste in reading material, but I’ve always liked her and she reminds me of my stepmother, so I tend to cut her slack. However, she managed to break the bonds of my patience this time, although she had the help of Mr. Cruise.

From the start of the interview it was like some nightmarish Robin Leach “When Wealthy Folk Visit Each Other”. Both Katie and Tom were on hand to welcome The Oprah and guide her in to “the mudroom”, where Chez Cruise had provided Oprah with her own brass plated cubby with her own monogrammed slippers to wear around the house. “Let me know if these aren’t comfortable,” says Tom. “I can always get you something else,” which somehow brings to mind a sweatshop in back full of pre-clears busily sewing Oprah labels on the back of an infinite number of slippers. Katie gives her totally authentic sounding contractually obligated “I love you” before leaving to “take the kids into town”.

Others have commented on Oprah’s somewhat tacky obsession, possibly even mania, with money and expensive things. Girlfriend is always bringing up the Benjamins, and not necessarily to her credit. Anyone remember the time she interviewed Anderson Cooper, whose old money mom Gloria Vanderbilt was in the audience, and she started going on about how she’s always impressed by people who don’t have to work who do make something of themselves? You could just see that Cooper was so appalled and mortified. It was a car crash of old money and the nouveau riche.

I’m afraid this unseemly aspect of her personality was in full force. First, she walks in to the huge spotless multi-jillion dollar kitchen which is possibly bigger than the average person’s home and says “It’s just SO NORMAL and kitchen like!” and then proceeds to compliment the wood paneled refrigerator. Show of hands of everyone out there with their fridge paneled to match the rest of their solid oak kitchen. Later, when Tom is showing her all his scripts, which he’s had leather bound, she becomes almost apoplectic over how much he could get for these on eBay, which she insists on repeating multiple times. It was not attractive.

Possibly my favorite moment of “When Wealthy Folk Visit Each Other” comes after visiting the gym, the toy wing, the spotless kitchen and then the dining room, Oprah tells Tom why she loves his home, and this is a direct quote: “[it’s] so earthy and so simple…Oh! There’s the photo that Annie Liebowitz did [of TomKat & Suri for Vanity Fair]”. Uh, yeah. I’m not going to ask for a show of hands for how many of you have an Annie Liebowitz portrait of yourselves on your earthy, simple dining room wall.

Lots of other sites offer a play by play of “the Interview” that follows. Oprah does bring up the “tough” questions, though you get the sense that Tom had received a list of them weeks before hand. As I watched the interview, I realized something about the way Cruise handles interviews which I’ve never witnessed so clearly before. Cruise has two ways of answering questions. Well, technically three.

One is to recite a very carefully rehearsed anecdote which has nothing to do with the topic at hand. Hence we get him telling the (highly suspicious) sounding story of how he himself carefully waxed the floor so his socks would slide for that shot in Risky Business, and later the oh so cute story about how he dressed up like Santa but his genius daughter Suri saw through his sham immediately.

The second similar way he has of answering questions is to repeat a carefully rehearsed sound bite. Thus he repeatedly said in answer to the Oprah Q&A about Brooke Shields “It came out wrong” and “It should be up to the parents”. Since we’re talking about Tom accusing Brooke of ruining her career by taking anti-depressants, and no one said a darn thing about giving drugs to kids, it sounded really weird.

The third way he had of answering questions is to simply repeat the question he’s just been asked in the form of a statement. “Were you surprised?” “Oh…yeah…I was totally…you know…surprised….absolutely surprised.” “Were you prepared [for the crazy fame that followed Risky Business]? I mean, how could you be?” “Oh, no, no, of course not….how could anyone be…prepared” God, I wanted to slap him myself through the TV, and though I haven’t been giving Oprah credit for much in this dog and pony show, I do give her credit for not smacking him.

He declined to say anything substantive about Scientology except “I think it’s best for people to read about it for themselves,” and then quickly reassured the world that respect for other religions is an absolute tenant of faith for Scientology, and OF COURSE he believes in God. I was particularly interested in how he handled Oprah’s questions about whether he was preventing Nicole from having access to the children. He described their relationship as “good, easy”, and “we share custody, that’s what we do.” Then, in case we didn’t get that, he said again that they “share custody, whenever”. So, whenever what? Whenever Nicole makes up her mind to move back to LA and stops behaving like a Suppressive Person?

Honestly, it’s hard to tell sometimes if Cruise is a lousy liar or just a lousy interview. Perhaps it’s the same difference. I have no doubt that he’ll be totally controlled and perfect for Monday’s chapter in front of a live audience, especially since the whole point of the show is to laud him for a movie which most people barely remember from twenty five years ago. Yay! Let’s pretend we all care! Yay!

I don’t think I can bear to watch it. Best of luck to you if you manage!!

[Above is a guest post from KT at Populucious, please visit often, and thx KT]

Crazy bitch is crazy.

A while back a story emerged about Nic Cage which was excerpted from a new autobiography from Kathleen Turner, Send Yourself Roses. Kathleen holds a special place in my heart because a.) her voice is deeper than mine (and that folks is SOMETHING) and b.) she’s a crazy bitch.

Kathleen accused actor Nic Cage of stealing someone’s dog, but that’s not all. She also accused him of being arrested for TWO DUI’s. Cage’s “solicitor” in this case in a London court revealed the lies:

Neither Hollywood actor was at London’s High Court for the hearing, where Cage’s solicitor Simon Smith told the judge that Turner’s claims were utterly false.

He said an extract of the book Send Yourself Roses, which appeared in the Daily Mail in January, described their experience of working together on the movie Peggy Sue Got Married in 1986.

Turner, 53, stated that her 44-year-old co-star was “arrested twice for drunk-driving and, I think, for stealing a dog. He’d come across a Chihuahua he liked and stuck it in his jacket.”

So basically, she just made this stuff up? Ok, the DUI thing I can understand, I mean WHO hasn’t gotten a DUI in Hollywood? But dog-knapper? That’s slander! Or is it libel? Whatever, Kathleen Turner is delusional, hormonally challenged, possibly male and altogether too old and in the way. Luckily, she’s been forced to come clean and must now suffer the consequences. No, she doesn’t have to turn in her penis.

Mr Smith said that Turner, Associated Newspapers and Headline Publishing Group now accepted that the allegations were defamatory and false and ought never to have been published.

He said it was put down to a mistake on Turner’s part and the other defendants had published in good faith.

They personally apologised for the damage caused to Cage’s personal and professional reputation and for the considerable distress and embarrassment.

They had agreed to reimburse all his legal costs and make a substantial donation to a charity chosen by him to benefit abuse victims.

Jane Phillips, counsel for the defendants, said they sincerely apologised and accepted that the allegations were false.

Outside court, Mr Smith said: “My client is extremely pleased with the outcome, which sets the record straight, since he has never been arrested for drunk driving, dog theft, or anything else.”

Yet.

Just kidding, I like Nic Cage, his best role ever was as Randy in Valley Girl. For reals!

Just because we love you and the YouTubes!

When I began writing about Anonymous’ protests against the Church of Scientology I had NO idea what to think, expect or envision. As far as I was concerned, they were two sinister organizations battling it out, and it was good idea to stay removed.

During my coverage, I was rickrolled, memed, exposed to weird variations of intentionally misspelled words and utterly lost in this seemingly surreal world. At some point, I visited Encyclopedia Dramatica and the Something Awful forums to do some research on “Anonymous” and I genuinely thought to myself, “how is it possible I could be blogging for over six years and be so clueless about an entire subculture of people.”

In all fairness, Anonymous does have a fairly sordid past, with a strange sense of humor. Both sites listed above have a tendency to make fun of the kinds of people and things that society politely protects due to an abundance of political correctness. The SA and ED sites are not for the PC or easily offended. You’ve been warned.

This however, does not mean that all individuals who call themselves Anonymous, are in fact “Anonymous.” Even those people who are Anonymous aren’t even Anonymous. Does that make sense? It shouldn’t. For months now I have read various parties try to define who Anonymous are and who they aren’t. Most Anonymous feel there is no proper way to define the group, and many are repulsed at the idea of even trying to do so. From my perspective, this stems from the very nature of the word “anonymous.” From Merriam-Websters definition:

anonymous

1 : not named or identified 2 : of unknown authorship or origin 3 : lacking individuality, distinction, or recognizability

Still confused? That’s natural. While I am not an authority by any means, I feel as informed as anyone else in the media to make distinctions. Yes, even in a group calling itself “Anonymous” there are distinctions. And in this case, quite marked.

Glosslip has actively chosen to interact with all sorts of people calling themselves “anonymous” and from what I have observed, there are three distinct groupings of Anonymous. I will attempt to define as best I understand.

But wait, there’s more…

There are images circulating which show a lovely brunette naked and engaged in various sex acts from artistic angles who looks vaguely like a famous actress. Or to put it another way, some chick with brown hair, who may or may not be Kristen Davis aka Charlotte from Sex In The City (and Melrose Place before that) allowed her picture to be taken while she was taking it.

Before we get into the specifics of the aforementioned photos, the first thing that struck me is why on earth would a famous woman allow herself to be photographed in the nude, with penises near her vajayjay or her face? I mean isn’t that the sort of cardinal sin any self-respecting actress would never commit? Sure Paris Hilton would, or Lindsay Lohan, or porn stars (wait are Paris and Lindsay porn stars? nevermind), but not sweet, innocent Kristin Davis!

Well, yes, even sweet girls like to be naughty and apparently having yourself photographed while doing the nasty is like, totally hot. Or something.

Kristin has denied the photos are hers, and since the angles are such that we can’t get a straight shot of her, then really it’s her word against the totally creepy scumbag who leaked the photos to the press. Did I mention that was a really scummy and creepy thing to do? What does this say about society when you can’t pick up some random dude, have unprotected sex with him, allow him to take pictures of you while having unprotected sex, and trust said guy to not leak these pictures on the eve of your first major film debut?

I guess it says we like naked pics of celebs, that’s what. So without further ado, some naked pics after the jump. NSFW

But wait, there’s more…

I honestly don’t even know what to make of this. Like everything that comes out of RTC and presented to the world as Scientology, this is both disturbing AND funny.

How do they do that? It’s like a Shakespearean tragedy. You are entertained for sure, but then you are deeply saddened.

Creating new realities and distorting what we call music.

One of the worst things about the WGA strike this past fall/winter was missing some of my favorite shows. We don’t watch a lot of TV in our house, but the shows we do watch, we watch religiously. Our favorite by far is Fox’s 24.

24 is centered around CTU agent Jack Bauer, played by the ruggedly handsome and sometimes reckless drinker, Kiefer Sutherland. The show missed its taping schedule due to the writer’s strike. This means we will have to wait until the fall to catch this year’s 24 episodes, as we follow Jack Bauer and the rest of the Counter-Terrorism Unit, track down terrorists who seek to destroy the United States and ultimately, the fabric of civilization.

So, being a big fan of this show, it also shocked me to find Marisol Nichols, who played CTU Associate-Special-Agent-in-Charge Nadia Yassir, is also a Scientologist, and has been for many years. Marisol had been in a few films and had some minor TV appearances prior to landing her role on 24, and not surprisingly like many actors who belong to Scientology, she credits the “tech” of L. Ron Hubbard, founder of Scientology for helping her with her career.

In an issue of Source, the Scientology magazine, Marisol talks about her solo NOT’s auditing sessions and her training at Flag Land Base in Clearwater, Florida:

But wait, there’s more…

No word yet, however, on whether he copped to being a gelatinous skidmark in the underwear of the music business.

Yes, Lou Pearlman, the musical genius behind (some would say literally) some of the world’s most famous boy bands, finally agreed to plead guilty to various charges:

The creator of the Backstreet Boys and ‘N Sync has agreed to plead guilty to charges he laundered money and made false statements during a bankruptcy proceeding. 

Boy band creator Lou Pearlman has agreed to plead guilty to money laundering and making false statements.

Lou Pearlman will appear in court Thursday, according to a 47-page plea agreement released Tuesday.

Federal prosecutors accuse Pearlman of lying to investors to raise millions of dollars for fake companies.

They say the total loss to investors is estimated at more than $300 million.

The plea deal says Pearlman will help investigators develop cases and testify against others who helped in his schemes.

Federal prosecutors still plan to seek a significant prison sentence for Pearlman.

Well, that’s good.  At least he still has a chance to use his talents.

So what exactly did Big Poppa (as he wanted his young proteges to call him) do, besides obviously exist on a diet of chocolate-covered bacon?  He fled the country after allegedly bilking investors out of almost $320M in fifteen years, duping people (mostly Florida retirees) in an intricate Ponzi scheme that eventually came crashing down.  He fabricated companies for investors to pour money into, he ruined lives with endless lawsuits, and in the end ran off with his tail between his legs when the truth came out.  He was eventually busted by the FBI on the island of Bali, where he had registered at a hotel under the alias “A. Incognito Johnson.”

As if that were not bad enough, it turns out that Lou, who had begun his empire in the blimp business (you can make up your own gas joke there), had an eye for the boys…not just for their talent, how well they could sing or dance or how nice they looked for the camera, but for his own nefarious purposes.  Starstruck young men (and their parents) were duped into falling for his line of bull, only to find themselves sharing more than profits with the rotund Svengali:

Some, especially the teenagers, shrugged and giggled when he showed them pornographic movies or jumped naked onto their beds in the morning to wrestle and play. Others, it appears, didn’t get off so easily. These were the young singers seen emerging from his bedroom late at night, buttoning their pants, sheepish looks on their faces. Some deny anything improper ever happened. But the parents of at least one, a member of the Backstreet Boys, complained. And for any number of young men who sought to join the world’s greatest boy bands, Big Poppa’s attentions were an open secret, the price some paid for fame.

“Some guys joked about it; I remember [one singer] asking me, ‘Have you let Lou blow you yet?’” says Steve Mooney, an aspiring singer who served as Pearlman’s assistant and lived in his home for two years. “I would absolutely say the guy was a sexual predator. All the talent knew what Lou’s game was. If they say no, they’re lying to you.”

Vanity Fair published a great article on this, from which the above quote was taken.  It’s a long read, but well worth the time if you want to know more about the seedy side of creating those innocuous boy band hits and the perfectly coiffed young males in them.  For example:

From outward appearances, Pearlman was not gay; in fact, over the years he dated several women, including a nurse. But even in those early years, when Pearlman shepherded the Backstreet Boys to appearances around the U.S. and Europe, members of the group and their families frequently gossiped about his sexual proclivities. “As a mother, you kind of put two and two together,” remembers Denise McLean, A. J. McLean’s mother. “Yet there was always that fine line where you sat back and went, ‘O.K., is this a guy who always wanted to be a father or an uncle? Is this all innocent? Or is it more?’ I kind of thought that there might have been some strange things going on. But you just didn’t know.” […]

It was during this period, in 1997 and 1998, that the first allegations of inappropriate behavior involving Pearlman appear to have surfaced. One incident centered on the youngest of the Backstreet Boys, Nick Carter, who in 1997 turned 17. Even for many of those closest to the group, what happened remains unclear. “My son did say something about the fact that Nick had been uncomfortable staying [at Pearlman’s house],” Denise McLean says. “For a while Nick loved going over to Lou’s house. All of a sudden it appeared there was a flip at some point. Then we heard from the Carter camp that there was some kind of inappropriate behavior. It was just odd. I can just say there were odd events that took place.” […]

In a telephone interview, Jane Carter stops just short of acknowledging Pearlman made improper overtures to her son. “Certain things happened,” she tells me, “and it almost destroyed our family. I tried to warn everyone. I tried to warn all the mothers.” Told that this article would detail allegations that Pearlman made overtures to other young men, she replies, “If you’re doing that, and exposing that, I give you a big flag. I tried to expose him for what he was years ago.… I hope you expose him, because the financial [scandal] is the least of his injustices.” When I ask why she won’t discuss it further, Carter says she doesn’t want to jeopardize her relationship with Nick. “I can’t say anything more,” she says. “These children are fearful, and they want to go on with their careers.”

I won’t go on, but trust me…the article is worth a read.  Grab a cup of coffee and some cookies and take a few minutes out of your life.

Oh, here’s a bit of Fat Louie trivia…I noticed this little throwaway sentence while rereading the article, and a little recognition bell went off in my head:

Other groups were soon in the works, including a five-teen band named Take 5, a three-teen group called LFO, and an all-girl group named Innosense.

And who was in Innosense, but none other than our own favorite trainwreck Britney Spears?

You know, before I saw the above video of “American Idol” hopeful Danny Noriega I already didn’t like him. Not because he’s a total flaming fruitcake of nonsense, because hey, it takes all kinds to make up the rainbow of life. Nope what I didn’t like about Danny, besides the fact he’s way prettier than I am, is that he’s such a little snotbag sh*t.

The way he rolls his eyes, pours it on for the camera, oozes pettiness and hostility, it’s all the things about today’s teenagers that I despise. His angst is completely insincere. We get it Danny, you are here, you’re queer, you want us to get used to it.

You aren’t the first gay teenager America’s ever seen. You aren’t even the first gay American Idol we’ve ever seen (Hello? Clay Aiken anyone?). Clearly, regardless of the opportunity you’ve been given to perform on the most watched singing talent show in the world, you are obviously pissed off about something in your life. Despite the fact, you are talented, attractive, charismatic and live in a world where you can be as openly “out” there as you want and for the most part, people accept you, you still can’t seem to spare us the drama and immaturity of your flippant insolence.

Also, how dare you crap on Santa and Christmas? This shows me how overly indulgent your parents must have been. They clearly should have spanked you more.

Danny, if you were my son, I’d wash your filthy mouth out with soap. Then I’d put a pretty little pink bow in your hair, some pick lipstick on your pouty little mouth and send you to your room.

John Travolta is stepping up to the plate and doing all he can to promote his favorite cause: Scientology.

Recently published, in the December 2007 issue of Scientology magazine, Source, is an ad (seen above) of John Travolta receiving a Platinum Meritorious award for having donated an additional $1.5 million to the IAS for a total of $2.5 million to the Church of Scientology’s “war chest” or the IAS. Over the summer, John had received the Gold Meritorious award for donating $1 million dollars.

Wikipedia states has this quote on their IAS entry:

The stated purpose of the IAS is “To unite, advance, support and protect the Scientology religion and Scientologists in all parts of the world, so as to achieve the aims of Scientology as originated by L. Ron Hubbard.”

This seems to corroborate the claims of the source who gave me this information. According to my source, Platinum Meritorious status is quite an honor among Scientologists, especially considering what these funds are used for:

“IAS, (International Association of Scientologists)…is also known as Scientology’s “War Chest”, and that money is used to attack critics of Scientology. Scn will tell you that the money is for their “protection” and to fund their “good works” but it’s really all going after and trying to silence anyone that gets in their way of “freeing mankind.”

Some of you may recall a story Glosslip broke a few weeks back showing a video from an IAS convention with CoS leader David Miscavige proclaiming success in their war on psychiatry and their efforts to “clear the planet” and “obliterate psychiatry.” It seems Mr. Travolta is putting his money where views are.

Though Travolta’s donation was quite generous, it’s nothing compared to the $10 million dollars voice-over star Nancy Cartright gave to the IAS. That story broke in Page Six a few weeks back, and it seemed incredible that such a large sum would come from someone whose affiliation with the Church of Scientology has been relatively low-key. Then again, Nancy does the voice of Bart Simpson on Fox’s longest-running series and hit show, “The Simpsons”, and isn’t really as visible, as say, the handsome, though often bizarre, Tom Cruise, whom, by the way, has only donated $5 million to the IAS.

There’s another strange coincidence to Nancy’s donation. “The Simpsons,” an immensely popular cartoon, which prides itself on biting satire, and has lampooned almost every institution and facet of American culture from religion to politics, has somehow managed to avoid even a hint of parody on Scientology. Could this be due to Nancy’s importance to the show?

Having seen what the makers of South Park went through to air their “Trapped In The Closet” episode poking fun at Tom Cruise, rumors of a secret gay life, and the story of Scientology’s Xenu, it’s hardly any wonder “Simpson” creator Matt Groening and the execs at Fox have avoided the controversial religion altogether. Scientology has a history for lacking a sense of humor as it pertains to their religion.

Keeping Scientology Working, or KSW, runs in the Travolta family it seems, as Source magazine, ran an ad in it’s Oct. issue showing Travolta’s wife and fellow Scientologist, Kelly Preston with her FLAG OT aware. Interestingly, Preston, is only a Gold Meritorious award holder, only having donated a mere $1 million dollars to the IAS coffer. Then again, Ms. Preston hasn’t had a hit film since 2003’s, Cat In The Hat, starring Michael Myers - so money might be a bit tight.

Fortunately, with all the stars in Scientology’s roster of “celeb” spokespeople jocking to be on the top of the list of most charitable, Scientology should have no shortage of funds to “obliterate psychiatry,” “clear the planet” of SP’s, PTS’ and other “undesirables”.