Another Attention-Starved Lohan Won't Shut Up
 
My soul is dying one molecule at a time. Today's soul-killer is Dina Lohan. In an interview for April's edition of Harper's Bizarre, Dina Lohan talks about her party mom image and daughter Lindsay's recent stint in rehab.Â
Logorreah Lohan laments:
"Oh, the party mom, the party mom, the party mom!" Lohan says. "Whoever said that, my ex-husband or whatever, I'm not the party mom!""Listen to me: Lindsay would drag me, literally drag my loser butt (to a club) and say, `I need you to know who these people are, Yeah, she trusts my judgment. She's in such a whirlwind; she's in a tornado. I mean, we're talking serious earthquake, you know?"
Um no, I don't know because I don't accompany my underage children to drinking establishments dressed like a hooker, riding on their coattails trying to live vicarously through their lives in the hopes of reliving my youth. Sorry, can't relate.Â
Dina Lohan on Lilo's substance abuse problems:
"Noooo! She is just a 20-year-old who had to reel it in. And she's from an addictive personality genetically. Lindsay had to fall and get up. I knew it was coming. I told her, but finally she was like, `Mommy, I had to do it myself. Cut her some slack."
I will be happy to cut Lindsay some slack just as soon as she does something useful. Like wear some underwear, stop being an attention-whore, stop trying to hump every guy in sight, stop showing up late for work, stop being an a-hole, stop sucking huge schwappe. Just stop in general.Â
In the meantime Dina, may I suggest you shut your lying cakehole? You know that you are the Numero Uno reason Lindsay's gone from being a sweet freckle-faced tween, to being a jizz-guzzling barfly who looks twice her age, with only half her braincells.Â
Blech. Hollywood stagemoms.
