Britney Officially Bails On Rehab, Says She's Cured! I Says BS!
Â
Well, TMZ called it yesterday that Britney would get an early reprieve from her rehab sentence, exactly 28 days, minus a few excursions here and there, some making out in the bushes, and the errant case a day Coca Cola habit she picked up in the joint.Â
According to Britney's rep Larry Rudolph:
"Britney Spears has been released by the Promises Malibu Treatment Center after successfully completing their program. We ask that the media respects her privacy as well as those of her family and friends at this time."
Frankly, rehab sounds like a lot of good times. Hanging out with other drug addicts and alcoholics, make-out sessions, lazing about, harassing the staff, day trips into the city — sign me up.
And for anyone who thinks this the last we've heard of Britney's trouble, I've got a magical tale to tell about a virginal princess named Paris whose hugs and kisses cure blindness and whose very soul brings all of the world's many colored people together in a swirling mass of peace and humanity.Â
Did I say cures blindness? Er, I meant causes your face to explode.
