Nicole Richie Pregnant, With A Real Baby And Everything
 
While I cannot independently confirm or deny this rumor, TMZ and In Touch Magazine feel comfortable enough to move forward, so that's good enough for me. Â
Nicole Richie is said to be about 3-months pregnant (and always the picture of health!!) and it is assumed that the child is her boyfriend's, Joel Madden, frontman for the almost punk band Good Charlotte.Â
If you will recall, Joel dated pop singer Hilary Duff a while back but broke up with her because she was too mature for his liking and expected him to, um, not act like a 12-year-old d-bag. Sadly Madden, who is 27, was unable to acquiesce to Hilary's (age 20) outrageous demands for age-appropriate behavior and the two broke up. Fortunately for Joel, Nicole Richie is 26 and is said to have the emotional maturity of a 7-year old, so if you do some quick math, (minus 5, carry the 2, subtract the 3) er that makes them perfect for each other.  And baby makes 3.Â
Would I be going out on a limb here to say that this is the most selfish and pathetic attempt to avoid jailtime ever cooked up by two sh*tforbrains? Rumors are that Nicole and Joel were "hoping" Nicole's pregnancy would afford her some leniency during her upcoming court date on July 11 for a DUI arrest back in February. Nicole was pulled over for driving the wrong way on the freeway. She admitted to police that she had smoked marijuana and was on vicodin while driving - proving that she isn't just a bad driver, but also a particular kind of stupid.
I can't wait to see the outcome of this one - both the birth AND the court appearance.
GRRRRREAT! Two dumbasses breeding, the circle of life is complete.
Cripes, Armageddon can't come soon enough.
