The World Reacts To Paris Hilton's Jail Sentence
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News has spread like a virus throughout the internet that our beloved Paris Hilton was sentenced to 45 days in county jail. While we console ourselves with this tragic outcome and the feelings of hopelessness that will slowly begin to fester in our hearts, I decided that I as citizen journalist, would share some of the responses from the public to this shocking news.Â
*cue the National Anthem*Â
"Like the great Alan Lomax, and the folklorists of yore who went out into the masses after such epic tragedies like the bombing at Pearl Harbor, and more recently September 11 — I too wish to capture the unfiltered and raw emotions as we react to this historic moment in time. It is my hope to preserve this memory for generations to come, so that they will see what the past has wrought and may correct for the betterment of humanity as a whole."
*bullsh*t*, *cough**
From ASL:Funkoniya said:Â Everytime a herpes spreading, attention whore goes to jail and angel gets its wings. Bravo, Superior Court Judge Michael T. Sauer, bravo. Posted on May 4, 2007 07:50 PM
The Superficial:Âedb87said: This is the best news since Jesus. Although I would have preferred he gave her 1,000 hours of community service. Could you imagine her picking up trash on the side of the highway? I'd drive all the way out to California to throw some McDonald's at her.
The county should make it ok for men to stop by the jail and dry hump her and slap the back of her head all day, every day.
Tiger_Tanaka says: Eliot Mintz rigged the whole thing so he could get a freakin' VACATION from these people. Genius.
Radar Online has some advice for Paris from ex-con Heidi Fleiss - here's my favorite quote on Paris defending herself:
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